Turkeys will thaw in the morning, then warm in the oven to an afternoon high near 190°F.
The kitchen will turn hot and humid, and if you bother the cook, be ready for a severe squall or cold shoulder.
During the late afternoon and evening, the cold front of a knife will slice through the turkey, causing an accumulation of one to two inches on plates.
Mashed potatoes will drift across one side while cranberry sauce creates slippery spots on the other. Please pass the gravy.
A weight watch and indigestion warning have been issued for the entire area, with increased stuffiness around the beltway.
During the evening, the turkey will diminish and taper off to leftovers, dropping to a low of 34°F in the refrigerator.
Looking ahead to the next two days, high pressure to eat sandwiches will be established.
Flurries of leftovers can be expected both days with a 50 percent chance of scattered soup late in the day.
We expect a warming trend where soup develops.
By early next week, eating pressure will be low as the only wish left will be the bone.
Chili: Edible weather - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Weather forecast for tonight: dark. - George Carlin
You bring your own weather to the picnic. - Harlan Coben
Eternity is two people and a roast turkey. - James Dent
A turkey never voted for an early Christmas. - Unknown
Despite the forecast, live like it's spring. - Lilly Pulitzer
Climate is what we expect. Weather is what we get. - Mark Twain
An end is in sight to the severe weather shortage. - Ian Macaskill
No duty is more urgent than that of returning thanks. - St. Ambrose
Weekend forecast: crafting with a chance of chocolate. - Unknown
There is no friend like a sister, in calm or stormy weather. - Christina Rossetti
For all that has been - thanks.
For all that will be - yes. - Dag Hammarskjold
We take for granted the things that we should be giving thanks for. - Unknown
Everybody talks about the weather, but nobody does anything about it. - Charles Dudley Warner
Thanks to this man I've gone from over-the-counter to over-the-barrel. - Unknown
I suppose the best kind of spring morning is the best weather God has to offer. - Dodie Smith
The turkey is living proof that an animal can survive with no intelligence at all. - Harvey D. Comstock
Thanksgiving is the one occasion each year when gluttony becomes a patriotic duty. - Michael Dresser
Go see that turkey for yourself, and see for yourself why you shouldn't see it. - Samuel Goldwyn
Advice from your friends is like the weather, some of it is good, some of it is bad. - Unknown
A lot of Thanksgiving days have been ruined by not carving the turkey in the kitchen. - Kin Hubbard
I don't make plans, because life is short and unpredictable - much like the weather. - Al Roker
I'm leaving because the weather is too good. I hate London when it's not raining. - Groucho Marx
Thanks you for being a part of my life, whether you were a Reason, a Season, or a Lifetime. - Unknown
Let's get an extended weather forecast from a jittery, inconsistent, reddish brown rodent. - Unknown
The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing. - Steven Wright
It's not my fault I was dragged out of my house by a mob and forced to predict the weather. - Punxsutawney Phil
I love Thanksgiving turkey - it's the only time in Los Angeles that you see natural breasts. - Arnold Schwarzenegger
My mother gave me my drive, but my father gave me my dreams. Thanks to him, I could see a future. - Liza Minnelli
We would worry less if we praised more. Thanksgiving is the enemy of discontent and dissatisfaction. - Harry Ironside
Thanksgiving is the language of heaven, and we had better start to learn it if we are not to be mere dumb aliens there. - AJ Gossip
They invented the three-day bank holiday weekend because you can't lump all the bad weather into just Saturday and Sunday. - Unknown
Rejoice evermore. Pray without ceasing. In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you. - I Thessalonians 5:16-18
Don't knock the weather. Nine-tenths of the people couldn't start a conversation if it didn't change once in a while. - Kin Hubbard
The trouble with weather forecasting is that it's right too often for us to ignore it, and wrong too often for us to rely on it. - Patrick Young
The long, dull, monotonous years of middle-aged prosperity or middle-aged adversity are excellent campaigning weather for the devil. - C S Lewis
Iron rusts from disuse; stagnant water loses its purity and in cold weather becomes frozen; even so does inaction sap the vigor of the mind. - Leonardo da Vinci
We're having something a little different this year for Thanksgiving. Instead of a turkey, we're having a swan. You get more stuffing. - George Carlin
NBC News just called it "The Great Freeze" - coldest weather in years. Is our country still spending money on the global warming hoax? - Donald Trump
Got no checkbooks, got no banks,
Still I'd like to express my thanks -
I got the sun in the mornin'
And the moon at night. - Irving Berlin
Thanksgiving, Turkey & Weather Sections
Going Cold Turkey
Grandma’s Beautiful Pies
Happy Thanksgiving, Y’all!
How To Cook A Turkey
Ode To A Turkey
Redneck Turkey Shoot
Run, Turkey, Run!
Thanksgiving Harvest Time
Thanksgiving Joe-ks 4U
Too Much Turkey
Turkey Wants You To Eat Pork!
’Twas The Night Before Thanksgiving
Build Back Better - Season 2
Build Back Better - Season 1
9 Months On The Inside
The Mighty Stegosaurus
Get A Dog They Said
Are You Ready?
Peddle Sewing Machine Sink
You Never Call
Navy Golf Course for Aircraft Carriers
Less Severe Inflation
Home Made Limo