Handicap Parking

Parking is such street sorrow. - Herb Caen

Chop your own path. Get off the car track. - A.Y. Jackson

In politics an absurdity is not a handicap. - Napoleon Bonaparte

Didn't he take the exercise tax off cars? - Archie Bunker

Being unconscious is the ultimate disability. - Jessa Gamble

Feminism is a wonderful idea until the car goes wrong. - Nicola Zweig

Auto racing began 5 minutes after the second car was built. - Henry Ford

The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it. - Dudley Moore

I have a strong sense that I have to educate people about disability. - Oscar Pistorius

A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who has never owned a car. - Carrie Snow

A private railroad car is not an acquired taste. One takes to it immediately. - Eleanor R. Belmont

I spent a lot of my money on booze, birds and fast cars... the rest I squandered. - George Best

I'm not an advocate for disability issues. Human issues are what interest me. - Aimee Mullins

You don't have to carry a designer bag that costs more than a car to look cool. - Kesha

A guy knows he’s in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days. - Tim Allen

I can get motivated seeing a kid at my son's school overcome a learning disability. - Jason Alexander

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke

A real patriot is the fellow who gets a parking ticket and rejoices that the system works. - Bill Vaughan

It was ability that mattered, not disability, which is a word I'm not crazy about using. - Marlee Matlin

Yesterday I parked my car in a tow-away zone... when I came back the entire area was missing. - Steven Wright

Ronald Reagan knew who he was. Barack Obama is still working through that equation politically. - Joe Scarborough

Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery. - Erma Bombeck

I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving. - Steven Wright

Many people with dyslexia truly suffer, and their lives are worse off for having had that disability. - Malcolm Gladwell

When Henry Ford made cheap, reliable cars people said, 'Nah, what's wrong with a horse?' - Elon Musk

Obama and his attack dogs have nothing but hate and anger in their hearts and spew it whenever possible. - Donald Trump

Women are like cars: we all want a Ferrari, sometimes want a pick-up truck, and end up with a station wagon. - Tim Allen

My disability exists not because I use a wheelchair, but because the broader environment isn't accessible. - Stella Young

Inherited wealth is a big handicap to happiness. It is as certain death to ambition as cocaine is to morality. - William K Vanderbilt

Life's golden age is when the children are too old to need babysitters and too young to borrow the family car. - Unknown

For all of the fights I have had in my life, both on and off the ice, I have only been in the back of a cop car once. - Tie Domi

I'm not a car guy. The subway gets me where I need to go efficiently and cheaply, and I don't worry about traffic. - Joe Scarborough

Even a race to Obama, she was gonna beat Obama. I don't know who would be worse, I don't know, how could it be worse? - Donald Trump

Disability is a way of getting some extremity, some kind of very difficult situation, that throws an interesting light on people. - Mark Haddon

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did, in his sleep. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car. - Unknown

I have an answering machine in my car. It says, "I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out." - Steven Wright

A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad. - Theodore Roosevelt

Now that women are jockeys, baseball umpires, atomic scientists, and business executives, maybe someday they can master parallel parking. - Bill Vaughan

A car hits a Jewish man. The paramedic rushes over and says, "Are you comfortable?" The guy says, "I make a good living." - Henny Youngman

My life is the land, the dogs, the car, the motorcycle, the pond, the canoe, going to pick up mail. It's just a rural retreat that I enjoy. - Burt Shavitz