Singing Gynecologist

Gynecologist’s “tip”: whistle while you work


A new, young MD was doing his residency in gynecology. He was quite embarrassed performing female pelvic exams. To conceal his embarrassment he had unconsciously formed a habit of whistling softly.

A middle aged lady upon whom he was performing this exam suddenly burst out laughing and further embarrassed him.

He looked up from his work and sheepishly said, “I’m sorry. Was I tickling you?”

She replied, “No Doctor, but the song you were whistling was ‘I wish I was an Oscar Meyer Wiener.’ ”


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We are here on Earth to fart around. - Kurt Vonnegut

Society is a hospital of incurables. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

A young doctor makes a humpy graveyard. - English Proverb

Hollywood is like Picasso's bathroom. - Candice Bergen

The doctor is to be feared more than the disease. - French Proverb

I write poems like some people sing in the bathroom. - Amit Bhatia

After two days in hospital I took a turn for the nurse. - WC Fields

A half doctor near is better than a whole one far away. - German Proverb

No man is a good doctor who has never been sick himself. - Chinese Proverb

I had plastic surgery last week. I cut up my credit cards. - Henny Youngman

A doctor whose breath smells has no right to medical opinion. - Martin H. Fischer

The kitchen. The bathroom. The yin and yang of the household. - David C. Holley

About half my time is spent on business operation type stuff. - Mark Zuckerberg

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A smart mother makes often a better diagnosis than a poor doctor. - August Bier

That Gerald Ford. He can't fart and chew gum at the same time. - Lyndon B. Johnson

The patient is not likely to recover who makes the doctor his heir. - Thomas Fuller

Confucius say: "Man who want pretty nurse, must be patient." - Unknown

You couldn't tell if she was dressed for an opera or an operation. - Irvin S Cobb

The best way to reduce the cost of medical care is to reduce the illness. - Arlen Specter

When it comes to plastic surgery and sushi, never be attracted by a bargain. - Graham Norton

Oh, when I was a kid, I was ugly. When I was born, the doctor smacked my mother. - Rodney Dangerfield

People pay the doctor for his trouble; for his kindness they still remain in his debt. - Seneca

A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines. - Frank Lloyd Wright

I have had my television aerials removed. It is the moral equivalent of a prostate operation. - Malcolm Muggeridge

My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people. - Orson Welles

With every bathroom renovation, there are three areas that I focus on: budget, function and style. - Candice Olson

When you’re a nurse you know that every day you will touch a life or a life will touch yours. - Unknown

I do like to read in bed, but because I have two kids I'm often forced to read in the bathroom. - Eoin Colfer

You might be a nurse if you firmly believe that "too stupid to live" should be a diagnosis. - Unknown

For marriage to be a success, every woman and every man should have her and his own bathroom. The end. - Catherine Zeta-Jones

When I was born the Doctor took one look at my face, turned me over and said, "Look, twins!" - Rodney Dangerfield

The only equipment lack in the modern hospital? Somebody to meet you at the entrance with a handshake! - Martin H. Fischer

I sleep with a light on in the bathroom so I can see where I'm at, because I wake up and have no clue. - Carrie Underwood

If my doctor told me I had only six minutes to live, I wouldn't brood, I'd just type a little faster. - Isaac Asimov

The doctor sees all the weakness of mankind, the lawyer all the wickedness, the theologian all the stupidity. - Arthur Schopenhauer

Only one rule in medical ethics need concern you: that action on your part which best conserves the interest of your patient. - Martin H. Fischer

There are three subjects on which the knowledge of the medical profession in general is woefully weak; they are manners, morals, and medicine. - Gerald F Lieberman


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13-Jul-2020