That’s Your Father

Tracing the family tree at the beach


A young boy was looking through the family album and asked his mother, “Who’s this guy on the beach with you with all the muscles and curly hair?”

“That’s your father.”

“Then who’s that old bald-headed fat man who lives with us now?”


QuotaBills
People like to trace their ancestry. - Richard Dawkins

A father is a banker provided by nature. - French Proverb

Grandmas are moms with lots of frosting. - Unknown

Poverty is the parent of revolution and crime. - Aristotle

Aren't most of you descended from pirates? - Prince Philip

I wonder if you can refuse to inherit the world. - Bill Watterson

Take it from me, parents just don't understand. - Will Smith

Family is not an important thing - it's everything. - Michael J. Fox

Anybody can make history, only a great man can write it. - Oscar Wilde

The two things children wear out are clothes and parents. - Unknown

My parents were neither very poor nor conspicuously honest. - Mark Twain

On Halloween, the parents sent their kids out looking like me. - Rodney Dangerfield

Family means putting your arms around each other and being there. - Barbara Bush

My father was grounded, a very meat-and-potatoes man. He was a baker. - Anthony Hopkins

You can't choose your ancestors, and neither can your descendants. - Unknown

The meek shall inherit the world, but they'll never increase market share. - William G McGowan

My father didn't tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it. - Clarence B. Kelland

The Holy Father's newest Encyclacle? Like anyone cares what he rides around on. - Archie Bunker

You don't choose your family. They are God's gift to you, as you are to them. - Desmond Tutu

My father used to say, "Don't raise your voice. Improve your argument." - Desmond Tutu

Fathers should be neither seen nor heard. That is the only proper basis for family life. - Oscar Wilde

I just wasn't cut out to be a Chinese Tiger Mom. I'm more of an Irish Setter Dad. - P.J. O'Rourke

A perfect parent is a person with excellent child-rearing theories and no actual children. - Dave Barry

The other night I ate at a real nice family restaurant. Every table had an argument going. - George Carlin

I don't know who my grandfather was, I am much more concerned to know what his grandson will be. - Abraham Lincoln

Why pay money to have your family tree traced; go into politics and your opponents will do it for you. - Unknown

The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a family all wrapped up in each other. - Bill Vaughan

Until you become a parent, you can't begin to discover your capacity for strength, love and fatigue. - Peter Gallagher

I want to die like my father; peacefully in his sleep, not screaming and terrified, like his passengers. - Bob Monkhouse

Children today are tyrants. They contradict their parents, gobble their food, and tyrannize their teachers. - Socrates

My parents have been visiting me for a few days. I just dropped them off at the airport. They leave tomorrow. - Margaret Smith

I don't think he's gonna come Edith. He just ain't got none of that, waddya call, family unconscious. - Archie Bunker

I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent back a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof. - Rodney Dangerfield

My father instilled in me that if you don't see things happening the way you want them to, you get out there and make them happen. - Susan Powter

I used to live an isolated existence, even in relationships, but now my family knows me for who I really am. Mostly, that's a good thing. - Tim Allen

Fang took the entire family out for coffee and donuts the other night. The kids enjoyed it. It was the first time they'd ever given blood. - Phyllis Diller

Clay. It's rain, dead leaves, dust, all my dead ancestors. Stones that have been ground into sand. Mud. The whole cycle of life and death. - Martine Vermeulen

A man finds room in the few square inches of the face for the traits of all his ancestors; for the expression of all his history, and his wants. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

I have frequently been questioned, especially by women, of how I could reconcile family life with a scientific career. Well, it has not been easy. - Marie Curie

Historically the family has played the primary role in educating children for life, with the school providing supplemental scaffolding to the family. - Stephen Covey


see also   Family  &  Relationship   Sections
A Woman’s Mind
“Female Speak” Translation
Flower Shop For Men
iGifts
Looking For Your Wife?
Secret Of A Long Marriage
Understanding Women

 

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29-May-2020