That’s Your Father

Tracing the family tree at the beach


A young boy was looking through the family album and asked his mother, “Who’s this guy on the beach with you with all the muscles and curly hair?”

“That’s your father.”

“Then who’s that old bald-headed fat man who lives with us now?”


QuotaBills
The Child is father of the Man. - William Wordsworth

By ancestry, I was born to rule. - Nelson Mandela

It is a wise father that knows his own child. - William Shakespeare

Aren't most of you descended from pirates? - Prince Philip

Take it from me, parents just don't understand. - Will Smith

Anybody can make history, only a great man can write it. - Oscar Wilde

There is never a problem child; there is only a problem parent. - A.S. Neill

Genealogy: Tracing yourself back to people better than you are. - John G. Pollard

If your parents never had children, chances are... neither will you. - Dick Cavett

The meek may inherit the earth, but they don't get in to Harvard. - Robin Williams

My father was grounded, a very meat-and-potatoes man. He was a baker. - Anthony Hopkins

Misers aren't fun to live with, but they make wonderful ancestors. - Unknown

For our immediate family and relatives, Canada was a land of opportunity. - Sidney Altman

Necessity may be the mother of invention, but play is certainly the father. - Roger von Oech

Live so you won't be ashamed to sell the family parrot to the town gossip. - Will Rogers

I don't have to look up my family tree, because I know that I'm the sap. - Fred Allen

My father used to say, "Don't raise your voice. Improve your argument." - Desmond Tutu

The family you came from isn't as important as the family you're going to have. - Ring Lardner

My parents always told me I could do anything, but never told me how long it would take. - Rita Rudner

I came from a big family. As a matter of fact, I never got to sleep alone until I was married. - Lewis Grizzard

Don't forget Mother's Day. Or as they call it in Beverly Hills, Dad's Third Wife Day. - Jay Leno

I fart in your general direction. Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries. - Monty Python Anb The Holy Grail

The first who was king was a fortunate soldier: Who serves his country well has no need of ancestors. - Voltaire

We are the children of many sires, and every drop of blood in us in its turn ... betrays its ancestor. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison. - WC Fields

Until you become a parent, you can't begin to discover your capacity for strength, love and fatigue. - Peter Gallagher

The place of the father in the modern suburban family is a very small one, particularly if he plays golf. - Bertrand Russell

Aw, Dad, you've done a lot of great things, but you're a very old man, and old people are useless. - Homer Simpson

All dentists talk while they work. They have inherited this from their professional ancestors, the barbers. - Mark Twain

A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold. - Ogden Nash

That he delights in the misery of others no man will confess, and yet what other motive can make a father cruel? - Joseph Addison

I don't think he's gonna come Edith. He just ain't got none of that, waddya call, family unconscious. - Archie Bunker

I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent back a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof. - Rodney Dangerfield

Call it a clan, call it a network, call it a tribe, call it a family. Whatever you call it, whoever you are, you need one. - Jane Howard

Our ancestors are very good kind of folks; but they are the last people I should choose to have a visiting acquaintance with. - Richard B. Sheridan

To be a successful father... there's one absolute rule: when you have a kid, don't look at it for the first two years. - Ernest Hemingway

The greatest thing in family life is to take a hint when a hint is intended - and not to take a hint when a hint isn't intended. - Robert Frost

My father was a baker and a lot of people do what their families did and I could have done that but I wanted to stay in show business. - Christopher Walken

Parents can only give good advice or put them on the right path, the final forming of a person's character lies in their own hands. - Anne Frank

Our ancestors believed in magic, prayers, trickery, browbeating and bullying. I think it would be fair to sum that up as 'Irish politics'. - Flann O'Brien


see also   Family  &  Relationship   Sections
A Woman’s Mind
“Female Speak” Translation
Flower Shop For Men
iGifts
Looking For Your Wife?
Secret Of A Long Marriage
Understanding Women

 

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18-Feb-2020