The fellow stormed into the postmaster’s office in a fury.
“I’ve been getting threatening letters in the mail for months and I want them stopped.”
“Of course,” said the postmaster. “Sending threatening letters through the mail is a federal offense. Do you know who’s sending them?”
“Yes,” shouted the man. “It’s those idiots down at the Internal Revenue Service.”
My own tax expert, H & R Crock. - Archie Bunker
The current tax code is a daily mugging. - Ronald Reagan
Man is not free unless government is limited. - Ronald Reagan
Every country has the government it deserves. - Joseph de Maistre
A hypocrite is a man who pays his taxes with a smile. - Will Rogers
Government always finds a need for whatever money it gets. - Ronald Reagan
Every decent man is ashamed of the government he lives under. - H L Mencken
My problem lies in reconciling my gross habits with my net income. - Errol Flynn
The duty of a patriot is to protect his country from its government. - Edward Abbey
In this world nothing can be said to be certain, except death and taxes. - Benjamin Franklin
Income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has. - Will Rogers
When a man retires his wife gets twice the husband but only half the income. - Chi Chi Rodriguez
The mystery of government is not how Washington works but how to make it stop. - P.J. O'Rourke
Disbelief in magic can force a poor soul into believing in government and business. - Tom Robbins
Either the government will be given to us or we shall seize it by marching on Rome. - Benito Mussolini
I just filled out my income tax forms. Who says you can't get killed by a blank? - Milton Berle
There's nothing like a two-hour tax appointment to make you question your career. - Shawn Hitchins
Of all the tasks of government, the most basic is to protect its citizens from violence. - John Foster Dulles
Patriotism is supporting your country all the time and your government when it deserves it. - Mark Twain
A broken heart is a very pleasant complaint for a man in London if he has a comfortable income. - George Bernard Shaw
A tax loophole is something that benefits the other guy. If it benefits you, it is a tax reform. - Russell B Long
There is one difference between a tax collector and a taxidermist - the taxidermist leaves the hide. - Mortimer Caplan
A government big enough to give you everything you want, is strong enough to take everything you have. - Thomas Jefferson
I believe a little incompatibility is the spice of life, particularly if he has income and she is pattable. - Ogden Nash
When government accepts responsibility for people, then people no longer take responsibility for themselves. - George Pataki
Relying on the government to protect your privacy is like asking a peeping tom to install your window blinds. - John P Barlow
If you put the federal government in charge of the Sahara Desert, in 5 years there'd be a shortage of sand. - Milton Friedman
Tariff: A scale of taxes on imports, designed to protect the domestic producer against the greed of his consumer - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Tariff: A scale of taxes on imports, designed to protect the domestic producer against the greed of his consumer. - Ambrose Bierce
Only government can take perfectly good paper, cover it with perfectly good ink and make the combination worthless. - Milton Friedman
Frankly, I'd like to see the government get out of war altogether and leave the whole field to private industry. - Joseph Heller
The best measure of a man's honesty isn't his income tax return. It's the zero adjust on his bathroom scale. - Arthur C. Clarke
If the government was as afraid of disturbing the consumer as it is of disturbing business, this would be some democracy. - Kin Hubbard
Very few of these panic-mongers have any personal knowledge of the countries that are already under blackshirt government. - Lord Rothermere
To compel a man to subsidize with his taxes the propagation of ideas which he disbelieves and abhors is sinful and tyrannical. - Thomas Jefferson
On my income tax 1040 it says, "Check this box if you are blind." I wanted to put a check mark about three inches away. - Tom Lehrer
In general, the art of government consists of taking as much money as possible from one party of the citizens to give to the other. - Voltaire
Love is much nicer to be in than an automobile accident, a tight girdle, a higher tax bracket, or a holding pattern over Philadelphia. - Judith Viorst
Indoors or out, no one relaxes in March, that month of wind and taxes;
The wind will presently disappear, the taxes last us all the year. - Ogden Nash
Ever occur to you why some of us can be this much concerned with animals suffering? Because government is not. Why not? Animals don't vote. - Paul Harvey
The current tax code is a daily mugging. - Ronald Reagan
Man is not free unless government is limited. - Ronald Reagan
Every country has the government it deserves. - Joseph de Maistre
A hypocrite is a man who pays his taxes with a smile. - Will Rogers
Government always finds a need for whatever money it gets. - Ronald Reagan
Every decent man is ashamed of the government he lives under. - H L Mencken
My problem lies in reconciling my gross habits with my net income. - Errol Flynn
The duty of a patriot is to protect his country from its government. - Edward Abbey
In this world nothing can be said to be certain, except death and taxes. - Benjamin Franklin
Income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has. - Will Rogers
When a man retires his wife gets twice the husband but only half the income. - Chi Chi Rodriguez
The mystery of government is not how Washington works but how to make it stop. - P.J. O'Rourke
Disbelief in magic can force a poor soul into believing in government and business. - Tom Robbins
Either the government will be given to us or we shall seize it by marching on Rome. - Benito Mussolini
I just filled out my income tax forms. Who says you can't get killed by a blank? - Milton Berle
There's nothing like a two-hour tax appointment to make you question your career. - Shawn Hitchins
Of all the tasks of government, the most basic is to protect its citizens from violence. - John Foster Dulles
Patriotism is supporting your country all the time and your government when it deserves it. - Mark Twain
A broken heart is a very pleasant complaint for a man in London if he has a comfortable income. - George Bernard Shaw
A tax loophole is something that benefits the other guy. If it benefits you, it is a tax reform. - Russell B Long
There is one difference between a tax collector and a taxidermist - the taxidermist leaves the hide. - Mortimer Caplan
A government big enough to give you everything you want, is strong enough to take everything you have. - Thomas Jefferson
I believe a little incompatibility is the spice of life, particularly if he has income and she is pattable. - Ogden Nash
When government accepts responsibility for people, then people no longer take responsibility for themselves. - George Pataki
Relying on the government to protect your privacy is like asking a peeping tom to install your window blinds. - John P Barlow
If you put the federal government in charge of the Sahara Desert, in 5 years there'd be a shortage of sand. - Milton Friedman
Tariff: A scale of taxes on imports, designed to protect the domestic producer against the greed of his consumer - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Tariff: A scale of taxes on imports, designed to protect the domestic producer against the greed of his consumer. - Ambrose Bierce
Only government can take perfectly good paper, cover it with perfectly good ink and make the combination worthless. - Milton Friedman
Frankly, I'd like to see the government get out of war altogether and leave the whole field to private industry. - Joseph Heller
The best measure of a man's honesty isn't his income tax return. It's the zero adjust on his bathroom scale. - Arthur C. Clarke
If the government was as afraid of disturbing the consumer as it is of disturbing business, this would be some democracy. - Kin Hubbard
Very few of these panic-mongers have any personal knowledge of the countries that are already under blackshirt government. - Lord Rothermere
To compel a man to subsidize with his taxes the propagation of ideas which he disbelieves and abhors is sinful and tyrannical. - Thomas Jefferson
On my income tax 1040 it says, "Check this box if you are blind." I wanted to put a check mark about three inches away. - Tom Lehrer
In general, the art of government consists of taking as much money as possible from one party of the citizens to give to the other. - Voltaire
Love is much nicer to be in than an automobile accident, a tight girdle, a higher tax bracket, or a holding pattern over Philadelphia. - Judith Viorst
Indoors or out, no one relaxes in March, that month of wind and taxes;
The wind will presently disappear, the taxes last us all the year. - Ogden Nash
Ever occur to you why some of us can be this much concerned with animals suffering? Because government is not. Why not? Animals don't vote. - Paul Harvey
see also Finance, Government & Stress Sections
2012 Tax Return (U.S.)
DiscourageMeant
IRS Custom Tax Thumb Drive
IRS Middle Class Pencil Sharpener
I.R.S. Humor
Letter to the IRS
New IRS Form
Pay Your Taxes
Revenue Canada Simplified Tax Form
Revenue Canada Subscription Cancellation
The Importance of Tax Return Accuracy (U.K.)
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05-Aug-2021 |