The fellow stormed into the postmaster’s office in a fury.
“I’ve been getting threatening letters in the mail for months and I want them stopped.”
“Of course,” said the postmaster. “Sending threatening letters through the mail is a federal offense. Do you know who’s sending them?”
“Yes,” shouted the man. “It’s those idiots down at the Internal Revenue Service.”
How large an income is thrift. - Cicero
Good government is good politics. - Richard J. Daley
Didn't he take the exercise tax off cars? - Archie Bunker
I'm spending a year dead for tax reasons. - Douglas Adams
Self-government won't work without self-discipline. - Paul Harvey
A wise man will live as much within his wit as his income. - Philip Dormer Stanhope
Government cannot and must not replace private initiative. - Kim Campbell
Every decent man is ashamed of the government he lives under. - H L Mencken
We have the best government in the world... that money can buy. - Mark Twain
A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of. - Jane Austen
For every action, there is an equal and opposite government program. - Bob Wells
Income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has. - Will Rogers
The avoidance of taxes is the only pursuit that still carries any reward. - John Maynard Keynes
Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for. - Will Rogers
The tax collector must love poor people, he's creating so many of them. - Bill Vaughan
Freedom of opinion can only exist when the government thinks itself secure. - Bertrand Russell
Baseball is a skilled game. It's America's game - it, and high taxes. - Will Rogers
The police force cannot be completely independent of the executive government. - P Chidambaram
I wouldn't mind paying taxes if I knew they were going to a friendly country. - Dick Gregory
Either the government will be given to us or we shall seize it by marching on Rome. - Benito Mussolini
I love Canada. I am from Canada. I will bash the Canadian government but never Canada. - Jason Priestley
Taxes are the dues that we pay for the privilege of membership in an organized society. - Franklin D Roosevelt
At the heart of the Irish economy has always been the philosophy of tax competitiveness. - Bono
A tax loophole is something that benefits the other guy. If it benefits you, it is a tax reform. - Russell B Long
So, if we lie to the government, it's a felony.
But if they lie to us, it's politics. - Bill Murray
A little government and a little luck are necessary in life, but only a fool trusts either of them. - P.J. O'Rourke
We don't seem to be able to check crime, so why not legalize it and then tax it out of business. - Will Rogers
Government, even in its best state, is but a necessary evil; in its worst state, an intolerable one. - Thomas Paine
I could juggle anything in my day: balls, cigar boxes, knives. But I could never juggle my income tax. - WC Fields
Ex-Presidents of the United States get state subsidies. Not so in Russia. You get no government support. - Mikhail Gorbachev
If a child, a spouse, a life partner, or a parent depends on you and your income, you need life insurance. - Suze Orman
Government is the great fiction, through which everybody endeavors to live at the expense of everybody else. - Frederic Bastiat
When government accepts responsibility for people, then people no longer take responsibility for themselves. - George Pataki
Frankly, I'd like to see the government get out of war altogether and leave the whole field to private industry. - Joseph Heller
All progress is based upon a universal, innate desire on the part of every living organism to live beyond its income. - Samuel Butler
There was a fire at the main Inland Revenue office in London today, but it was put out before any serious good was done. - Ronnie Corbett
Very few of these panic-mongers have any personal knowledge of the countries that are already under blackshirt government. - Lord Rothermere
Psychiatrists say it's not good for man to keep too much to himself. The Internal Revenue Service says the same thing. - Harold Smith
The punishment which the wise suffer who refuse to take part in the government, is to live under the government of worse men. - Plato
If you make any money, the government shoves you in the creek once a year with it in your pockets, and all that don't get wet you can keep. - Will Rogers
Good government is good politics. - Richard J. Daley
Didn't he take the exercise tax off cars? - Archie Bunker
I'm spending a year dead for tax reasons. - Douglas Adams
Self-government won't work without self-discipline. - Paul Harvey
A wise man will live as much within his wit as his income. - Philip Dormer Stanhope
Government cannot and must not replace private initiative. - Kim Campbell
Every decent man is ashamed of the government he lives under. - H L Mencken
We have the best government in the world... that money can buy. - Mark Twain
A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of. - Jane Austen
For every action, there is an equal and opposite government program. - Bob Wells
Income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has. - Will Rogers
The avoidance of taxes is the only pursuit that still carries any reward. - John Maynard Keynes
Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for. - Will Rogers
The tax collector must love poor people, he's creating so many of them. - Bill Vaughan
Freedom of opinion can only exist when the government thinks itself secure. - Bertrand Russell
Baseball is a skilled game. It's America's game - it, and high taxes. - Will Rogers
The police force cannot be completely independent of the executive government. - P Chidambaram
I wouldn't mind paying taxes if I knew they were going to a friendly country. - Dick Gregory
Either the government will be given to us or we shall seize it by marching on Rome. - Benito Mussolini
I love Canada. I am from Canada. I will bash the Canadian government but never Canada. - Jason Priestley
Taxes are the dues that we pay for the privilege of membership in an organized society. - Franklin D Roosevelt
At the heart of the Irish economy has always been the philosophy of tax competitiveness. - Bono
A tax loophole is something that benefits the other guy. If it benefits you, it is a tax reform. - Russell B Long
So, if we lie to the government, it's a felony.
But if they lie to us, it's politics. - Bill Murray
A little government and a little luck are necessary in life, but only a fool trusts either of them. - P.J. O'Rourke
We don't seem to be able to check crime, so why not legalize it and then tax it out of business. - Will Rogers
Government, even in its best state, is but a necessary evil; in its worst state, an intolerable one. - Thomas Paine
I could juggle anything in my day: balls, cigar boxes, knives. But I could never juggle my income tax. - WC Fields
Ex-Presidents of the United States get state subsidies. Not so in Russia. You get no government support. - Mikhail Gorbachev
If a child, a spouse, a life partner, or a parent depends on you and your income, you need life insurance. - Suze Orman
Government is the great fiction, through which everybody endeavors to live at the expense of everybody else. - Frederic Bastiat
When government accepts responsibility for people, then people no longer take responsibility for themselves. - George Pataki
Frankly, I'd like to see the government get out of war altogether and leave the whole field to private industry. - Joseph Heller
All progress is based upon a universal, innate desire on the part of every living organism to live beyond its income. - Samuel Butler
There was a fire at the main Inland Revenue office in London today, but it was put out before any serious good was done. - Ronnie Corbett
Very few of these panic-mongers have any personal knowledge of the countries that are already under blackshirt government. - Lord Rothermere
Psychiatrists say it's not good for man to keep too much to himself. The Internal Revenue Service says the same thing. - Harold Smith
The punishment which the wise suffer who refuse to take part in the government, is to live under the government of worse men. - Plato
If you make any money, the government shoves you in the creek once a year with it in your pockets, and all that don't get wet you can keep. - Will Rogers
see also Finance, Government & Stress Sections
2012 Tax Return (U.S.)
DiscourageMeant
IRS Custom Tax Thumb Drive
IRS Middle Class Pencil Sharpener
I.R.S. Humor
Letter to the IRS
New IRS Form
Pay Your Taxes
Revenue Canada Simplified Tax Form
Revenue Canada Subscription Cancellation
The Importance of Tax Return Accuracy (U.K.)
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