Did you hear about the guy who had a job circumsizing elephants?
The pay was lousy but the tips were big.
No doctor is better than three. - German Proverb
The best doctor gives the least medicines. - Benjamin Franklin
The way a doctor writes out a subscription. - Archie Bunker
A little chocolate a day keeps the doctor at bay. - Marcia Carrington
The elephant can survive only if forests survive. - Mark Shand
Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. - Erma Bombeck
Three out of four doctors recommend another doctor. - Graffito
Anything related to elephants is irrelephant. - Unknown
A half doctor near is better than a whole one far away. - German Proverb
No man is a good doctor who has never been sick himself. - Chinese Proverb
A doctor whose breath smells has no right to medical opinion. - Martin H. Fischer
My doctor gave me two weeks to live. I hope they're in August. - Ronnie Shakes
The patient is not likely to recover who makes the doctor his heir. - Thomas Fuller
A good laugh and a long sleep are the best cures in the Doctor's book. - Irish Proverb
Before you eat the elephant, make sure you know what parts you want to eat. - Todd Stocker
I have a memory like an elephant. I remember every elephant I've ever met. - Herb Caen
Oh, when I was a kid, I was ugly. When I was born, the doctor smacked my mother. - Rodney Dangerfield
The best doctors in the world are Doctor Diet, Doctor Quiet, and Doctor Merryman. - Jonathan Swift
First the Doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me. - Steve Martin
No, Doctor, I don't want to grow young again. I just want to keep on growing old. - Madame de Rothschild
I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places. - Henny Youngman
I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course. - Groucho Marx
A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines. - Frank Lloyd Wright
I wonder why you can always read a Doctor's bill but you can never read his prescription. - Finley Peter Dunne
One morning I shot an elephant in my pyjamas.
How he got into my pyjamas I'll never know. - Groucho Marx
I wondher why ye can always read a doctor's bill an' ye niver can read his purscription. - Finley Peter Dunne
When I was born the Doctor took one look at my face, turned me over and said, "Look, twins!" - Rodney Dangerfield
When you have an elephant by the hind legs and he is trying to run away, it's best to let him run. - Abraham Lincoln
If my doctor told me I had only six minutes to live, I wouldn't brood, I'd just type a little faster. - Isaac Asimov
The doctor sees all the weakness of mankind, the lawyer all the wickedness, the theologian all the stupidity. - Arthur Schopenhauer
I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster. - Joe E. Lewis
My illness is due to my doctor's insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid they force down helpless babies. - WC Fields
Following his doctor's orders, Nikita (Khrushchev) has cut his drinking in half. He's leaving out the water. - Bob Hope
The best doctor in the world is a veterinarian. He can't ask his patients what is the matter - he's got to know. - Will Rogers
My doctor recently told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years older already. - Milton Berle
A doctor who cannot take a good history and a patient who cannot give one are in danger of giving and receiving bad treatment. - Unknown
I've got a great doctor. He gave a guy six months to live. They couldn't pay his bill so he gave him another six months. - Henny Youngman
Let no one suppose that the words doctor and patient can disguise from the parties the fact that they are employer and employee. - George Bernard Shaw
I went to the doctor because I'd swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills. My doctor told me to have a few drinks and get some rest. - Rodney Dangerfield
A man who cannot work without his hypodermic needle is a poor doctor. The amount of narcotic you use is inversely proportional to your skill. - Martin H. Fischer
The best doctor gives the least medicines. - Benjamin Franklin
The way a doctor writes out a subscription. - Archie Bunker
A little chocolate a day keeps the doctor at bay. - Marcia Carrington
The elephant can survive only if forests survive. - Mark Shand
Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. - Erma Bombeck
Three out of four doctors recommend another doctor. - Graffito
Anything related to elephants is irrelephant. - Unknown
A half doctor near is better than a whole one far away. - German Proverb
No man is a good doctor who has never been sick himself. - Chinese Proverb
A doctor whose breath smells has no right to medical opinion. - Martin H. Fischer
My doctor gave me two weeks to live. I hope they're in August. - Ronnie Shakes
The patient is not likely to recover who makes the doctor his heir. - Thomas Fuller
A good laugh and a long sleep are the best cures in the Doctor's book. - Irish Proverb
Before you eat the elephant, make sure you know what parts you want to eat. - Todd Stocker
I have a memory like an elephant. I remember every elephant I've ever met. - Herb Caen
Oh, when I was a kid, I was ugly. When I was born, the doctor smacked my mother. - Rodney Dangerfield
The best doctors in the world are Doctor Diet, Doctor Quiet, and Doctor Merryman. - Jonathan Swift
First the Doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me. - Steve Martin
No, Doctor, I don't want to grow young again. I just want to keep on growing old. - Madame de Rothschild
I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places. - Henny Youngman
I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course. - Groucho Marx
A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines. - Frank Lloyd Wright
I wonder why you can always read a Doctor's bill but you can never read his prescription. - Finley Peter Dunne
One morning I shot an elephant in my pyjamas.
How he got into my pyjamas I'll never know. - Groucho Marx
I wondher why ye can always read a doctor's bill an' ye niver can read his purscription. - Finley Peter Dunne
When I was born the Doctor took one look at my face, turned me over and said, "Look, twins!" - Rodney Dangerfield
When you have an elephant by the hind legs and he is trying to run away, it's best to let him run. - Abraham Lincoln
If my doctor told me I had only six minutes to live, I wouldn't brood, I'd just type a little faster. - Isaac Asimov
The doctor sees all the weakness of mankind, the lawyer all the wickedness, the theologian all the stupidity. - Arthur Schopenhauer
I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster. - Joe E. Lewis
My illness is due to my doctor's insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid they force down helpless babies. - WC Fields
Following his doctor's orders, Nikita (Khrushchev) has cut his drinking in half. He's leaving out the water. - Bob Hope
The best doctor in the world is a veterinarian. He can't ask his patients what is the matter - he's got to know. - Will Rogers
My doctor recently told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years older already. - Milton Berle
A doctor who cannot take a good history and a patient who cannot give one are in danger of giving and receiving bad treatment. - Unknown
I've got a great doctor. He gave a guy six months to live. They couldn't pay his bill so he gave him another six months. - Henny Youngman
Let no one suppose that the words doctor and patient can disguise from the parties the fact that they are employer and employee. - George Bernard Shaw
I went to the doctor because I'd swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills. My doctor told me to have a few drinks and get some rest. - Rodney Dangerfield
A man who cannot work without his hypodermic needle is a poor doctor. The amount of narcotic you use is inversely proportional to your skill. - Martin H. Fischer
see also Doctor & Elephant Sections
Circumcision
Circumcision Without Paining
Whale Circumcision
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15-Nov-2019 |