“No Time For Anesthetic” Golfer

Make sure the Dentist doesn’t slow down your golf game


A man and his wife walked into a Dentist’s office. The man said to the Dentist, “Doctor, I’m in a big hurry! I have two buddies sitting out in my car waiting for us to go play golf. So forget about the anesthetic and just pull the tooth and be done with it - I don’t have time to wait for the anesthetic to work!”

The Dentist thought to himself, “My goodness, this sure is a very brave man, asking me to pull his tooth without using anything to kill the pain.”

So the Dentist asked him, “Which tooth is it, sir?”

The man turned to his wife and said, “Open your mouth, Honey, and show the Doctor which tooth hurts.”


QuotaBills
Teeth are always in style. - Dr. Seuss

Never floss with a stranger. - Joan Rivers

Drill Sergeant: An army dentist. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The tongue is ever turning to the aching tooth. - Thomas Fuller

We break bones and we lose teeth. We play rugby. - Martin Johnson

My friend has false teeth - with braces on them. - Steven Wright

Golf is an easy game, it's just hard to play. - Unknown

Even pearls are dark before the whiteness of his teeth. - William R. Alger

Love conquers all things - except poverty and toothache. - Mae West

Conflict Of Interest: A dental school with a hockey team - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

He lied through his teeth and even his teeth were false. - Phil Callaway

The uglier a man's legs are, the better he plays golf. - H G Wells

Hold me, grip me, cherish me, pretend that I'm a golf club! - Unknown

When I die, bury me on the golf course so my husband will visit. - Unknown

Be kind to your dentist because he has "fillings" too. - Unknown

I got a new set of golf clubs for my husband. Best trade I ever made. - Unknown

Now Bart, since you broke Grandpa's teeth, he gets to break yours. - Homer Simpson

It is after you have lost your teeth that you can afford to buy steaks. - Pierre Renoir

You don't have to brush your teeth - just the ones you want to keep. - Unknown

A man loses his illusions first, his teeth second, and his follies last. - Helen Rowland

How has retirement affected my golf game? A lot more people beat me now. - Dwight D Eisenhower

I know I am getting better at golf because I am hitting fewer spectators. - Gerald R. Ford

We do have a zeal for laughter in most situations, give or take a dentist. - Joseph Heller

In golf as in life, it's the follow-through that makes the difference. - Unknown

An aching tooth is better out than in.
To lose a rotting member is a gain. - Richard Baxter

It is impossible to imagine Goethe or Beethoven being good at billiards or golf. - H L Mencken

If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball. - Jack Lemmon

I still have my teeth. I don't want to lose them at age 61 in some hockey game. - Jim Flaherty

Golf is the worst drug in the world. You just keep coming back fro more embarrassment. - Deacon Jones

It's good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling. - Mark Twain

Sometimes the game of golf is just too difficult to endure with a golf club in your hands. - Bobby Jones

It is almost impossible to remember how tragic a place the world is when one is playing golf. - Robert Lynd

Dentist: a prestidigitator who, putting metal into your mouth, pulls coin out of your pocket. - Ambrose Bierce

The only reason I ever played golf in the first place was so I could afford to hunt and fish. - Sam Snead

I have a tip that can take five strokes off anyone's golf game. It's called an eraser. - Arnold Palmer

A physician buries his mistakes, a dentist pulls them out, but a teacher has to live with them. - Unknown

If a tie is like kissing your sister, losing is like kissing your grandmother with her teeth out. - George Brett

Don't you just hate it when you try to think of something other than golf... and you can't? - Mike Purkey

Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air. - Jack Benny

The reason your golf pro tells you to keep your head down is so that you can't see him laughing. - Phyllis Diller

Many of us are at the 'metallic' age - gold in our teeth, silver in our hair, and lead in our pants. - Unknown

I'm 42 around the chest, 52 around the waist, 92 around the golf course, and a nuisance around the house. - Groucho Marx

I don't get off on romantic parts. But I often think if I had had my dental work done early on, well, maybe. - Morgan Freeman

All satire is blind to the forces liberated by decay. Which is why total decay has absorbed the forces of satire. - Theodor Adorno

Nothing soothes me more after a long and maddening course of pianoforte recitals than to sit and have my teeth drilled. - George Bernard Shaw

Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps. - Tiger Woods

I still play hockey every now and then, and I still golf. But my biggest exercise is walking my big dog in the park every day. - Michael J. Fox

It's a funny relationship that makeup artists have. I always feel kind of like a dentist. People look at me and think of pain. - Rick Baker

I like cast iron coated with enamel for longevity and forgiveness if I happen to take my eyes off the prize while pouring Chianti. - Mario Batali

I don't know him very well... I've played him at golf and beat him badly both times, and I think that probably had a negative impact on him. - Donald Trump


see also   Golf  Section
Beautiful Bride - “In-dentured” For Life
Dental Checkup
Dentist Talk
Denture Cup
Dental Plan - Latest Extraction Technology
False Teeth
Hillbilly Tooth Fairy
Hippo Toothbrush
Modern Dentistry - Painful but Fast!
Nice Teeth For All The Crap He Eats
Pastor’s New Teeth
Pet Dentist
Redneck Bird Dogs
Staff Teeth
Uplifting Tooth Extraction

 

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21-May-2022