A man and his wife walked into a Dentist’s office. The man said to the Dentist, “Doctor, I’m in a big hurry! I have two buddies sitting out in my car waiting
for us to go play golf. So forget about the anesthetic and just pull the tooth
and be done with it - I don’t have time to wait for the anesthetic to work!” Floss like a boss! - Unknown Teeth are always in style. - Dr. Seuss Golf is a good walk spoiled. - Mark Twain I'm a golfer, not an athlete. - Lee Westwood Work: The thing that interferes with golf. - Frank Dane The tongue is ever turning to the aching tooth. - Thomas Fuller My friend has false teeth - with braces on them. - Steven Wright Even pearls are dark before the whiteness of his teeth. - William R. Alger Trips to the dentist - I like to postpone that kind of thing. - Johnny Depp Every tooth in a man's head is more valuable than a diamond. - Miguel de Cervantes A dentist at work in his vocation always looks down in the mouth. - George D. Prentice I'm as old as my tongue and a little bit older than my teeth. - Kris Kringle I got a new set of golf clubs for my husband. Best trade I ever made. - Unknown Harmony makes small things grow; lack of it makes great things decay. - Sallust If a patient cannot clean his teeth, no dentist can clean them for him. - Martin H. Fischer The last thing my kids ever did to earn money was lose their baby teeth. - Phyllis Diller Income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has. - Will Rogers A man loses his illusions first, his teeth second, and his follies last. - Helen Rowland If you break 100, watch your golf. If you break 80, watch your business. - Joey Adams How has retirement affected my golf game? A lot more people beat me now. - Dwight D Eisenhower One advantage of golf over bowling is that you never lose a bowling ball. - Don Carter I told my dentist my teeth are going yellow. he told me to wear a brown tie. - Rodney Dangerfield It is impossible to imagine Goethe or Beethoven being good at billiards or golf. - H L Mencken If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball. - Jack Lemmon I still have my teeth. I don't want to lose them at age 61 in some hockey game. - Jim Flaherty The grinding of the intellect is for most people as painful as a dentist's drill. - Leonard Woolf Logic is the hygiene the mathematician practices to keep his ideas healthy and strong. - Hermann Weyl Adam and Eve had many advantages but the principal one was that they escaped teething. - Mark Twain A man begins cutting his wisdom teeth the first time he bites off more than he can chew. - Herb Caen I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course. - Groucho Marx Sometimes the game of golf is just too difficult to endure with a golf club in your hands. - Bobby Jones The only reason I ever played golf in the first place was so I could afford to hunt and fish. - Sam Snead I have a tip that can take five strokes off anyone's golf game. It's called an eraser. - Arnold Palmer Hockey players wear numbers because you can't always identify the body with dental records. - Unknown My wife is such a bad cook, if we leave dental floss in the kitchen the roaches hang themselves. - Rodney Dangerfield Golf combines two favorite American pastimes: taking long walks, and hitting things with a stick. - P.J. O'Rourke Some tortures are physical And some are mental, But the one that is both is dental. - Ogden Nash Don't you just hate it when you try to think of something other than golf... and you can't? - Mike Purkey I live at the dentist's. I'm on my third set of teeth that they put in with nails and screws. - Charles N. Reilly If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you work at it, it's golf. - Bob Hope The place of the father in the modern suburban family is a very small one, particularly if he plays golf. - Bertrand Russell The best and cheapest dentistry is when the right thing is done extremely well the first time and it lasts. - Unknown My parents live in a retirement community, which is basically a minimum-security prison with a golf course. - Joel Warshaw I don't get off on romantic parts. But I often think if I had had my dental work done early on, well, maybe. - Morgan Freeman I do get scared of the dentist, so a drive-through dentist might make me feel more at home. If I got to stay in my car. - Jessica Pare I like cast iron coated with enamel for longevity and forgiveness if I happen to take my eyes off the prize while pouring Chianti. - Mario Batali Learning to play golf is like learning to play the violin. It's not only difficult to do, it's very painful to everyone around you. - Hal Linden How is it that mercury is not safe for food additives and Over the Counter drug products, but it is safe in our vaccines and dental amalgams? - Dan Burton Zipper: Two rows of unsmiling teeth that often induce laughter in others, especially when inadvertently left open following a trip to the john - Daffynitions joe-ks.com Golf is a thinking man's game. You can have all the shots in the bag, but if you don't know what to do with them, you've got troubles. - Chi Chi Rodriguez see also Golf Section Beautiful Bride - “In-dentured” For Life Dental Checkup Dentist Talk Denture Cup Dental Plan - Latest Extraction Technology False Teeth Hillbilly Tooth Fairy Hippo Toothbrush Modern Dentistry - Painful but Fast! Nice Teeth For All The Crap He Eats Pastor’s New Teeth Pet Dentist Redneck Bird Dogs Staff Teeth Uplifting Tooth Extraction |
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