What You Get When You Cross an
Elephant with a Rhinoceros

I can't mate in captivity. - Gloria Steinem

When turkeys mate they think of swans. - Johnny Carson

It's the time of year when Canadians mate. - Craig Ferguson

The elephant can survive only if forests survive. - Mark Shand

Anything related to elephants is irrelephant. - Unknown

Before you eat the elephant, make sure you know what parts you want to eat. - Todd Stocker

I have a memory like an elephant. I remember every elephant I've ever met. - Herb Caen

My roommate got a pet elephant. Then it got lost. It's in the apartment somewhere. - Steven Wright

One morning I shot an elephant in my pyjamas.
How he got into my pyjamas I'll never know. - Groucho Marx

When you have an elephant by the hind legs and he is trying to run away, it's best to let him run. - Abraham Lincoln

Valentine's Day: Rubbing singles' noses in their lack of a mate and the noses of couples in their lack of time. - Emma McLaughlin

If you are really Master of your Fate,
It shouldn't make any difference to you whether Cleopatra or the Bearded Lady is your mate. - Ogden Nash