The Stress Diet

Coping with constant stress


This diet is designed to help you cope with constant stress ...

BREAKFAST
1/2 grapefruit
1 slice whole wheat toast, dry
8 oz skimmed milk

LUNCH
4 oz lean broiled chicken breast
1 cup steamed spinach
1 cup herb tea
1 Oreo cookie

MID AFTERNOON SNACK
rest of the Oreos in the package
2 pints of rocky road ice cream
1 jar hot fudge sauce
nuts, cherries, whipped cream

DINNER
2 loaves garlic bread with cheese
large sausage, mushroom and cheese pizza
3 milky way candy bars

LATE EVENING SNACK
Entire frozen cheesecake, eaten directly from freezer

RULES FOR THIS DIET
1. If you eat something and no one sees you eat it, it has no calories;
2. If you drink a diet soda with a candy bar, the calories in the candy bar are canceled out by the diet soda;
3. When you eat with someone else, calories don’t count if you don’t eat more than they do;
4. Food used for medicinal purposes NEVER count, such as brandy, hot chocolate and Sara Lee cheesecake;
5. If you fatten up everyone else around you, then you look thinner;
6. Movie related foods (Milk Duds, Buttered popcorn, Junior Mints, Red Hots, Tootsie Rolls, etc.) do not have additional calories because they are part of the entertainment package and not part of one’s personal fuel;
7. Cookie pieces contain no calories - the process of breaking causes calorie leakage;
8. Things licked off knives and spoons have no calories if you are in the process of preparing something. Examples are: peanut butter on a knife making a sandwich and ice cream on a spoon making a sundae;
9. Foods that have the same color have the same number of calories. Examples are: Spinach and pistachio ice cream; mushrooms and white chocolate. NOTE: Chocolate is a universal color and may be substituted for any other food color;
10. Foods that are frozen have no calories because calories are units of heat. Examples are ice cream, frozen pies and popsicles.




QuotaBills
I'm a fat anorexic. - Kiri Te Kanawa

The first wealth is health. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

I could eat my body weight in sushi. - Mikey Way

Happiness is good health and a bad memory. - Ingrid Bergman

Happiness is equilibrium. Shift your weight. - Tom Stoppard

Leave off all thin potations and addict thyself to sack. - William Shakespeare

I don't trust any diet that doesn't allow sugar. - Bethenny Frankel

If you ignore your health for long enough, it'll go away. - Unknown

The first couple of days on the detox diet aren't pleasant. - Carol Vorderman

I don't mind that I'm fat. You still get the same money. - Marlon Brando

Fond of lawsuits, little wealth; fond of doctors, little health. - Hebrew Proverb

I don't diet, I just don't eat as much as I'd like to. - Linda Evangelista

Once you lose the weight, you're really anxious to eat healthy. - Etta James

Being in a good frame of mind helps one keep in the picture of health. - Unknown

I've been on a diet for two weeks and all I've lost is two weeks. - Totie Fields

A rich rogue is like a fat hog, who never does good 'til as dead as a log. - Benjamin Franklin

Health is like money - we never have a true idea of its value until we lose it. - Josh Billings

The only time to eat diet food is while you're waiting for the steak to cook. - Julia Child

Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing. - Redd Foxx

Man should not try to avoid stress any more than he would shun food, love, or exercise. - Hans Selye

Our marriage vows: till death do us part, for better for worse, in secrets and in health. - Archie Bunker

I believe that how you feel is very important to how you look - that healthy equals beautiful. - Victoria Principal

The second day of a diet is always easier than the first. By the second day you're off it. - Jackie Gleason

What can be added to the happiness of man who is in health, out of debt, and has a clear conscience? - Adam Smith

If fat people just gave skinny people more food, we could solve obesity and hunger at the same time. - Ashton Kutcher

Most fat food is fried. Fried food tastes great, and people don't seem to care about the fat aspect. - Eric Schlosser

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat. - Alex Levine

Moderation. Small helpings. Sample a little bit of everything. These are the secrets of happiness and good health. - Julia Child

When wealth is lost, nothing is lost. When health is lost, something is lost. When character is lost, all is lost. - Rev. Billy Graham

Health is your greatest wealth, so experiencing a marathon and seeing what you're capable of is really special. - Christy Turlington

Perfect freedom is as necessary to the health and vigor of commerce as it is to the health and vigor of citizenship. - Patrick Henry

A dark-chocolate truffle melts in my mouth, and I forget about everything else... even the fact that I'm on a diet. - Barbara Brooke

Does America really need to be the best at everything? You already dominate the world in economics, military power and obesity. - Trevor Noah

A party of order or stability, and a party of progress or reform, are both necessary elements of a healthy state of political life. - John Stuart Mill

The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd druther not. - Mark Twain

I pray for forgiveness. For help and guidance. To be a better person. For the health of my family. For the world to be a better place. - Tyson Fury

Animals are not our selfie props. If there's any risk that your photo is going to hurt or stress an animal, it's not worth it. - Angela Henderson

I worked in a health food store once. A guy came in and asked me, "If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?" - Steven Wright

She's so fat she's my two best friends. She wears stretch caftans. She's got more chins than the Chinese telephone directory. - Joan Rivers

Health is the finest possession. Contentment is the ultimate wealth. Trustworthy people are the best relatives. Unbinding is the supreme ease. - Buddha


see also   Food  Section
A Balanced Diet
Balanced Diet
Balanced Food Delivery
Balanced Meal
Beauty Bag
Bus Wait Weight
Coffee Spoon
Diet Fork
Diet Hard
Diet Pills
Diet Silverware
Diet Spoon
Diet Utensils
Donut Sale
Gin & Tonic Diet
Important Health Information
Jogger’s Weight Scale
Learn To Cook
Milkshake Diet
My New Diet
Obesity Is OK
Reasons to Stop Dieting
Squeegee Clothing
Texas Diet
Vodka Diet
Weight Watchers Bus

 

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19-Jan-2021