The Rules of Chocolate

Are you eating too slowly?


If you’ve got melted chocolate all over your hands, you’re eating it too slowly.

Chocolate covered raisins, cherries, orange slices & strawberries all count as fruit, so eat as many as you want.

The problem: How to get 2 pounds of chocolate home from the store in hot car. The solution: Eat it in the parking lot.

Diet tip: Eat a chocolate bar before each meal. It’ll take the edge off your appetite and you’ll eat less.

A nice box of chocolates can provide your total daily intake of calories in one place. Isn’t that handy?

If you can’t eat all your chocolate, it will keep in the freezer. But if you can’t eat all your chocolate, what’s wrong with you?

If calories are an issue, store your chocolate on top of the fridge. Calories are afraid of heights, and they will jump out of the chocolate to protect themselves.

If I eat equal amounts of dark chocolate and white chocolate, is that a balanced diet? Don’t they actually counteract each other?

Money talks. Chocolate sings.

Chocolate has many preservatives. Preservatives make you look younger.

Q. Why is there no such organization as Chocoholics Anonymous?
A. Because no one wants to quit.

If not for chocolate, there would be no need for control top pantyhose. An entire garment industry would be devastated.

Put “eat chocolate” at the top of your list of things to do today. That way, at least you’ll get one thing done.


QuotaBills
Chocolate cake is the bomb! - Scarlett Pomers

Hot Chocolate: Stolen candy - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

It's never too late for chocolate. - Unknown

I'm a woman who wants her chocolate. - Jessica Simpson

A balanced diet is chocolate in both hands. - Unknown

I am a chocolatarian. I only eat chocolate. - Unknown

I'm Hybrid. I run on chocolate and wine. - Unknown

Behind every good woman is a lot of chocolate. - Unknown

Forget love - I'd rather fall in chocolate! - Unknown

We have chocolate in common - that's enough. - Rachel Hollis

A little chocolate a day keeps the doctor at bay. - Marcia Carrington

It does seem like the chocolate brings good luck. - Lauren Oliver

Sometimes a girl's gotta have some chocolate. - Carrie Underwood

In the cookie of life, friends are chocolate chips. - Salman Rushdie

If chocolate is the answer, the question is irrelevant. - Kim Knott

Chocolate is nature's way of making up for Mondays. - Unknown

To chocolate or not to chocolate... is there any question? - Unknown

It was 2:00 p.m., too early for wine but not for chocolate. - Andrea Hurst

Chocolate doesn't ask silly questions. Chocolate understands. - Unknown

Chocolate is medicinal. I just did another study that confirms it. - Michelle M. Pillow

Nine out of ten people like chocolate. The tenth person always lies. - Unknown

Chocolate is something you take for granted until you don't have any. - Marja McGraw

Chocolate is cheaper than therapy, and you don't need an appointment. - Unknown

I want someone who will look at me the same way I look at chocolate cake. - Unknown

All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt. - Charles M. Schulz

I need God's grace and something baked with peanut butter and chocolate. - Gloria Furman

A nice creamy chocolate cake does a lot for a lot of people; it does for me. - Audrey Hepburn

Moderation, honey, in all things but love and chocolate. That's my motto. - Barbara Bretton

Some people are chocolate and sweets people. I love French fried. That and caviar. - Cameron Diaz

I want to stay curled and cosied and chocolated... forever in my mother's arms. - Sanober Khan

Happiness. Simple as a glass of chocolate or tortuous as the heart. Bitter. Sweet. Alive. - Joanne Harris

The greatest tragedies were written by the Greeks and Shakespeare... neither knew chocolate. - Sandra Boynton

There's no point in wasting calories on cheap chocolate, always opt for the darkest and richest. - Nanci Rathbun

Then she thought bitterly that it would be much easier to resist chocolate if her life were less stressful. - J K Rowling

Dear Diamond,
We all know who is really a girl's best friend.
Yours sincerely,
Chocolate Cake - Unknown

I have this theory that chocolate slows down the aging process. It may not be true, but do I dare take the chance? - Unknown

It was like having a box of chocolates shut in the bedroom drawer. Until the box was empty it occupied the mind too much. - Graham Greene

Put 'eat chocolate' at the top of your list of things to do today. That way, at least you'll get one thing done. - Unknown

My greatest strength is common sense. I'm really a standard brand - like Campbell's tomato soup or Baker's chocolate. - Katharine Hepburn

I've got this thing for spicy stuff. Now, if you give me hot chocolate with chili pepper, a book and a bubble bath, I'm a happy girl. - Shiloh Walker


see also   Chocolate  Section
Chocolate Bed
Chocolate Chip Cookies for Engineers & Scientists
Chocolate Couch
Chocolate Easter Eggs
Chocolate Math
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26-May-2022