The Rules of Chocolate

Are you eating too slowly?


If you’ve got melted chocolate all over your hands, you’re eating it too slowly.

Chocolate covered raisins, cherries, orange slices & strawberries all count as fruit, so eat as many as you want.

The problem: How to get 2 pounds of chocolate home from the store in hot car. The solution: Eat it in the parking lot.

Diet tip: Eat a chocolate bar before each meal. It’ll take the edge off your appetite and you’ll eat less.

A nice box of chocolates can provide your total daily intake of calories in one place. Isn’t that handy?

If you can’t eat all your chocolate, it will keep in the freezer. But if you can’t eat all your chocolate, what’s wrong with you?

If calories are an issue, store your chocolate on top of the fridge. Calories are afraid of heights, and they will jump out of the chocolate to protect themselves.

If I eat equal amounts of dark chocolate and white chocolate, is that a balanced diet? Don’t they actually counteract each other?

Money talks. Chocolate sings.

Chocolate has many preservatives. Preservatives make you look younger.

Q. Why is there no such organization as Chocoholics Anonymous?
A. Because no one wants to quit.

If not for chocolate, there would be no need for control top pantyhose. An entire garment industry would be devastated.

Put “eat chocolate” at the top of your list of things to do today. That way, at least you’ll get one thing done.


QuotaBills
Books and chocolate make life bearable. - Unknown

A balanced diet is chocolate in both hands. - Unknown

When coffee dreams, it dreams of chocolate. - Unknown

I am a chocolatarian. I only eat chocolate. - Unknown

Chocolate is what I love. I have it every day. - Jennifer Hudson

Anything is good if it's made of chocolate. - Jo Brand

We have chocolate in common - that's enough. - Rachel Hollis

When no one understands you, chocolate is there. - Daniel Worona

A little chocolate a day keeps the doctor at bay. - Marcia Carrington

I've never met a chocolate I didn't like. - Unknown

If it's not chocolate, it's not breakfast. - Laini Taylor

In the cookie of life, friends are chocolate chips. - Salman Rushdie

Chocolate is nature's way of making up for Mondays. - Unknown

If there's no chocolate in Heaven, I'm not going. - Jane Seabrook

Life without books, chocolate and coffee is just useless. - Nadun Lokuliyanage

To chocolate or not to chocolate... is there any question? - Unknown

It was 2:00 p.m., too early for wine but not for chocolate. - Andrea Hurst

Chocolate is medicinal. I just did another study that confirms it. - Michelle M. Pillow

Venice is like eating an entire box of chocolate liqueurs in one go. - Truman Capote

Chemically speaking, chocolate really is the world's perfect food. - Michael Levine

I only eat chocolate for you... so there'll be more of me to love! - Unknown

In Heaven, chocolate has no calories and is served as the main course. - Unknown

Some say women are addicted to chocolate. I say we're merely loyal. - Cathy Guisewite

Chocolate is something you take for granted until you don't have any. - Marja McGraw

All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt. - Charles M. Schulz

I need God's grace and something baked with peanut butter and chocolate. - Gloria Furman

Chocolate makes otherwise normal people melt into strange states of ecstasy. - John West

What you see before you, my friend, is the result of a lifetime of chocolate. - Katharine Hepburn

The 12-step chocolate program: Never be more than 12 steps away from chocolate! - Terry Moore

Happiness. Simple as a glass of chocolate or tortuous as the heart. Bitter Sweet. Alive. - Joanne Harris

Happiness. Simple as a glass of chocolate or tortuous as the heart. Bitter. Sweet. Alive. - Joanne Harris

Mama always said life was like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get. - Forrest Gump

Money can't buy happiness. But, it can buy a chocolate, which is pretty much the same thing. - Hanako Ishii

There's no point in wasting calories on cheap chocolate, always opt for the darkest and richest. - Nanci Rathbun

Then she thought bitterly that it would be much easier to resist chocolate if her life were less stressful. - J K Rowling

I have this theory that chocolate slows down the aging process. It may not be true, but do I dare take the chance? - Unknown

It was like having a box of chocolates shut in the bedroom drawer. Until the box was empty it occupied the mind too much. - Graham Greene

Remember the days when you let your child have some chocolate if he finished his cereal? Now, chocolate is one of the cereals. - Robert Orben

Whenever I have a spare second, I'm in the kitchen whipping up a batch of cookies. I make a mean batch of chocolate chippers. - Karlie Kloss

I've got this thing for spicy stuff. Now, if you give me hot chocolate with chili pepper, a book and a bubble bath, I'm a happy girl. - Shiloh Walker


see also   Chocolate  Section
Chocolate Bed
Chocolate Chip Cookies for Engineers & Scientists
Chocolate Couch
Chocolate Easter Eggs
Chocolate Math
Eat Your Vegetables

 

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17-Jan-2020