Pet Lobsters

Fishing without a license

After a day fishing in the ocean a fisherman is walking from the pier carrying two lobsters in a bucket. He is approached by the Game Warden who asks him for his fishing license.

The fisherman says to the warden, “I did not catch these lobsters, they are my pets. Every day I come down to the water and whistle, and these lobster jump out and I take them for a walk only to return them at the end of the day.”

The warden, not believing him, reminds him that it is illegal to fish without a license. The fisherman turns to the warden and says, “If you don’t believe me then watch,” as he throws the lobsters back into the water.

The warden says, “Now whistle to your lobsters and show me that they will come out of the water.”

The fisherman turns to the warden and says, “What lobsters?”


QuotaBills
The world is your lobster! - Arthur Daley

All men are equal before fish. - Herbert Hoover

There's always a bigger fish. - Qui-Gon Jinn

Paraffins: Found on sides of fish - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

There are plenty more fish in the sea. - English Proverb

He fishes well who uses a golden hook. - Latin Proverb

A woman needs a man like a fish needs a net. - Cynthia Heimel

You know why fish are so thin? They eat fish. - Jerry Seinfeld

No good fish goes anywhere without a porpoise. - Lewis Carroll

Net Worth: Measurement of a fisherman's wealth - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Electric Eel: Fish that thrives in strong currents - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

When life gives you lemons, order the lobster tail. - Ziad K. Abdelnour

One can think of life after the fish is in the canoe. - Hawaii Proverb

A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle. - Gloria Steinem

Be patient and calm; no one can catch a fish with anger. - Herbert Hoover

At high tide, fish eat ants; at low tide, ants eat fish. - Thai Saying

Retire to what? I already play golf and fish for a living. - Julius Boros

A sushi chef has to spot the best-quality fresh fish instantly. - Nobu Matsuhisa

A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats. - Benjamin Franklin

It's okay to eat fish because they don't have any feelings. - Kurt Cobain

If you were to make little fishes talk, they would talk like whales. - Oliver Goldsmith

Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things. - George Carlin

A lawyer is an odd sort of fish, first rotten, then green, then ripe. - Robert Christy

No human being, however great or powerful, was ever so free as a fish. - John Ruskin

Unabated: 1. A fishhook without a worm; 2. A mousetrap without cheese. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Europe's the mayonnaise, but America supplies the good old lobster. - D.H. Lawrence

Govern a great nation as you would cook a small fish. Do not overdo it. - Lao Tzu

A fishing rod is a stick with a hook at one end and a fool at the other. - Samuel Johnson

What you need is somebody new - there's more than 1 fish in the woodpile. - Archie Bunker

Fishing is boring, unless you catch an actual fish, and then it is disgusting. - Dave Barry

Let your hook be always cast. In the pool where you least expect it, will be fish. - Ovid

We've drifted away from being fishers of men to being keepers of the aquarium. - Paul Harvey

Is this chicken or is this fish? I know it's tuna but it says chicken of the sea. - Jessica Simpson

I went fishing with Rod Ewert. He was using a dotted line. He caught every other fish. - Steven Wright

The only reason I ever played golf in the first place was so I could afford to hunt and fish. - Sam Snead

Cajun is country food by farmers and fisherman that arrived in Louisiana from Acadiana, Canada. - Paul Prudhomme

Grilling outside with my parents at the Jersey shore. We would grill lobster and corn in the summer. - Bobby Flay

When they see me holding fish, they can see that I am comfortable with kings as well as with paupers. - Imelda Marcos

I was readin' an article about the animal population - there's millions of pets explodin'. - Archie Bunker

If people concentrated on the really important things in life, there'd be a shortage of fishing poles. - Doug Larson

It is our art that has an opportunity to leave a footprint in the sand. They don't wrap fish in our work. - Hugh N Jacobsen

Luck affects everything; let your hook always be cast. In the stream where you least expect it, there will be fish. - Ovid

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. - George Carlin

Don't tell fish stories where the people know you; but particularly, don't tell them where they know the fish. - Mark Twain

The only kind of seafood I trust is the fish stick, a totally featureless fish that doesn't have eyeballs or fins. - Dave Barry

Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime. Unless he doesn't like sushi, then you also have to teach him to cook. - Auren Hoffman

It is, admittedly, a base foodstuff, but lobster, well prepared, can nevertheless be made to satisfy the distinguished gourmand. - Eli Brown

I'm fairly adventurous with my eating. I've tried kangaroo, and Moreton Bay bugs, which are a kind of lobster, are so good. - Brian O'Driscoll

Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it was stupid. - Albert Einstein

I'll paddle board, swim in the ocean, roll in the sand, soak up the sun, eat good food, be with friends and family and go fishing with my dad. - Behati Prinsloo


see also   Fishing  Section
Pet Fish
Pet Fish Chores

 

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23-Oct-2020