Pet Lobsters

Fishing without a license

After a day fishing in the ocean a fisherman is walking from the pier carrying two lobsters in a bucket. He is approached by the Game Warden who asks him for his fishing license.

The fisherman says to the warden, “I did not catch these lobsters, they are my pets. Every day I come down to the water and whistle, and these lobster jump out and I take them for a walk only to return them at the end of the day.”

The warden, not believing him, reminds him that it is illegal to fish without a license. The fisherman turns to the warden and says, “If you don’t believe me then watch,” as he throws the lobsters back into the water.

The warden says, “Now whistle to your lobsters and show me that they will come out of the water.”

The fisherman turns to the warden and says, “What lobsters?”


QuotaBills
I got bigger fish to fly - Archie Bunker

The world is your lobster! - Arthur Daley

All men are equal before fish. - Herbert Hoover

Paraffins: Found on sides of fish - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

There are plenty more fish in the sea. - English Proverb

A woman needs a man like a fish needs a net. - Cynthia Heimel

All cats love fish but fear to wet their paws. - Chinese Proverb

No good fish goes anywhere without a porpoise. - Lewis Carroll

Love is the net where hearts are caught like fish. - Muhammad Ali

Net Worth: Measurement of a fisherman's wealth - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Electric Eel: Fish that thrives in strong currents - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle. - Gloria Steinem

Don't bargain for fish which are still in the water. - India Proverb

The fun of fishing is catching 'em, not killing 'em. - Norman Schwarzkopf

I'm a terrible cook, but I make very good lobster salad. - Nancy Carell

A sushi chef has to spot the best-quality fresh fish instantly. - Nobu Matsuhisa

It's okay to eat fish because they don't have any feelings. - Kurt Cobain

If you were to make little fishes talk, they would talk like whales. - Oliver Goldsmith

Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things. - George Carlin

A lawyer is an odd sort of fish, first rotten, then green, then ripe. - Robert Christy

Europe's the mayonnaise, but America supplies the good old lobster. - D.H. Lawrence

A fishing rod is a stick with a hook at one end and a fool at the other. - Samuel Johnson

A dead fish can float downstream, but it takes a live one to swim upstream. - WC Fields

Clement Attlee reminds me of a dead fish before it has had time to stiffen. - George Orwell

Any man who puts his intelligence up against a fish and loses had it coming. - John Steinbeck

I think fish is nice, but then I think that rain is wet, so who am I to judge? - Douglas Adams

Fishing is boring, unless you catch an actual fish, and then it is disgusting. - Dave Barry

We've drifted away from being fishers of men to being keepers of the aquarium. - Paul Harvey

I went fishing with Rod Ewert. He was using a dotted line. He caught every other fish. - Steven Wright

Governing a large country is like frying a small fish. You spoil it with too much poking. - Lao-Tzu

Many men go fishing all of their lives without knowing that it is not fish they are after. - Henry David Thoreau

The dent in his car is hardly cold and he's coming over here to claim his pound of fish. - Archie Bunker

I was in a sushi bar and it dawned on me - how could I discriminate between a cow and a fish? - Carre Otis

Cajun is country food by farmers and fisherman that arrived in Louisiana from Acadiana, Canada. - Paul Prudhomme

Without my pets, my wallet would be full, my house would be clean, but my heart would be empty. - Unknown

When they see me holding fish, they can see that I am comfortable with kings as well as with paupers. - Imelda Marcos

I was readin' an article about the animal population - there's millions of pets explodin'. - Archie Bunker

That's why I don't eat lobster or anything like that. Because they're alive when you kill it. - Nicole Polizzi

Give a man a fish and you have fed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you have fed him for a lifetime. - Chinese Proverb

It is our art that has an opportunity to leave a footprint in the sand. They don't wrap fish in our work. - Hugh N Jacobsen

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. - George Carlin

Don't tell fish stories where the people know you; but particularly, don't tell them where they know the fish. - Mark Twain

The only kind of seafood I trust is the fish stick, a totally featureless fish that doesn't have eyeballs or fins. - Dave Barry

There is only one thing harder than looking for a dewdrop in the dew, and that is fishing for a clam in the clam chowder. - New England Proverb

I love lean meats like chicken, turkey. I'm obsessed with sushi and fish in general. I eat a lot of veggies and hummus. - Shawn Johnson

Only when the last tree has withered, and the last fish caught, and the last river been poisoned, will we realize we cannot eat money. - Cree Proverb

A woman should never be seen eating or drinking, unless it be lobster salad and Champagne, the only true feminine and becoming viands. - George G. Byron

Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it was stupid. - Albert Einstein

When I get through tearing a lobster apart, or one of those tender West Coast octopuses, I feel like I had a drink from the fountain of youth. - Joseph Mitchell

I'll paddle board, swim in the ocean, roll in the sand, soak up the sun, eat good food, be with friends and family and go fishing with my dad. - Behati Prinsloo


see also   Fishing  Section
Pet Fish
Pet Fish Chores

 

7 Hours In 1 Image

Mexican School Bus

Tree Sorrow

OCD Electrician

2021 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Redneck Shower Head

Wise Moves

Fox Hunting Madness

Emperor Penguins

The Side Effects of Veganism

Stair Railing Electrician

Cold Faucet

Make Womb For Baby

Hardtail Bike

Birth Control Kit
Full list of creditsFacebookTwitterDiggStumbleUponDelicious

28-Jan-2021