A young clerk’s responsibilities included bringing the judge a hot cup of coffee at the start of every day. Each morning the judge was enraged that the coffee cup arrived two-thirds full. The clerk explained that he had to rush to get the coffee delivered while it was still hot, which caused him to spill much of it along the way.
None of the judge’s yelling and insults produced a full cup of coffee, until he finally threatened to cut the clerk’s pay by one-third if he continued to produce one-third less than the judge wanted.
The next morning he was greeted with a cup of coffee that was full to the brim, and the next morning and the morning after that.
The judge couldn’t resist gloating over his success and smugly complimented the clerk on his new technique.
“Oh, there’s not much to it,” admitted the clerk happily, “I take some coffee in my mouth right outside the coffee room, and spit it back in when I get outside your office.”
Necessity hath no law. - Oliver Cromwell
Agree, for the law is costly. - William Camden
Judge me when you are perfect. - Unknown
A good lawyer is a bad neighbor. - French Proverb
Whenever law ends, tyranny begins. - John Locke
Position is nine-tenths of the law. - Archie Bunker
The good of the people is the chief law. - Cicero
Do you not know that I am above the law? - James II
Lawyers are guardians of the legal order. - Philip Wood
In law, nothing is certain but the expense. - Samuel Butler
Our ancestors ... were laborers, not lawyers. - Thomas Jefferson
A government of law is a government of lawyers. - Saying
Lawyers are the foot soldiers of our Constitution. - Rennard Strickland
The law must be stable, but it must not stand still. - Roscoe Pound
Judge a man by his questions rather than his answers. - Voltaire
Lawyers are in the business of advocacy, not judgment. - Allan C Hutchinson
Law of Inflation: Whatever goes up will go up some more. - Kin Hubbard
Life without books, chocolate and coffee is just useless. - Nadun Lokuliyanage
Coffee is a beverage that puts one to sleep when not drank. - Alphonse Allais
It is a secret worth knowing, that lawyers rarely go to law. - Moses Crowell
I can have peace of mind only when I forgive rather than judge. - Gerald Jampolsky
Death is not the end. There remains the litigation over the estate. - Ambrose Bierce
You can not stop the spread of an idea by passing a law against it. - Harry S Truman
Tragedy: a busload of lawyers going over a cliff with an empty seat. - Unknown
Books should be tried by a judge and jury as though they were crimes. - Samuel Butler
Layers are the only persons in whom ignorance of the law is not punished. - Jeremy Bentham
The only stable state is the one in which all men are equal before the law. - Aristotle
You cannot live without the lawyers, and certainly you cannot die without them. - Joseph H Choate
Time is money, especially when you're talking to a lawyer or an accountant. - Joe-kster
Lawyers are operators of toll bridges which anyone in search of justice must pass. - Jane Bryant Quinn
It is the trade of lawyers to question everything, yield nothing, and talk by the hour. - Thomas Jefferson
My husband and I had our best sex during our divorce. It was like cheating on our lawyers. - Priscilla Lopez
If this is coffee, please bring me some tea. But if this is tea, please bring me some coffee. - Abraham Lincoln
At his best, man is the noblest of all animals; separated from law and justice he is the worst. - Aristotle
You are the one who calls the law of attraction into action, and you do it through your thoughts. - Rhonda Byrne
I learned law so well, the day I graduated I used the college, won the case, and got my tuition back. - Fred Allen
Children begin by loving their parents; after a time they judge them; rarely, if ever, do they forgive them. - Oscar Wilde
The legal system is often a mystery, and we, its priests, preside over rituals baffling to everyday citizens. - Henry G. Miller
A lawyer's duty is to read the law well himself, then tell the people what it is, and let them act upon it. - Brigham Young
There are not enough jails, not enough policemen, not enough courts to enforce a law not supported by the people. - Hubert H Humphrey
The minute you read something that you can't understand, you can almost be sure that it was drawn up by a lawyer. - Will Rogers
No oppression is so heavy or lasting as that which is inflicted by the perversion and exorbitance of legal authority. - Joseph Addison
The courtrooms of America all too often have Piper Cub advocates trying to handle the controls of Boeing 747 litigation. - Warren E. Burger
How lawyers make work for one another! You're all priests, worshipping the same god. No wonder you adore one another. - Joyce Carol Oates
If we judge ourselves only by our aspirations and everyone else only their conduct we shall soon reach a very false conclusion. - Calvin Coolidge
Anyone who takes it on himself, on his own authority, to break a bad law, thereby authorizes everyone else to break the good ones. - Denis Diderot
A nation that is afraid to let its people judge the truth and falsehood in an open market is a nation that is afraid of its people. - John F Kennedy
Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it was stupid. - Albert Einstein
Music is amoral law. It gives soul to the universe, wings to the mind, flight to the imagination, and charm and gaiety to life and to everything. - Plato
The Post Office just recalled their newest stamps. They had a picture of lawyers on them, and people couldn't figure out which side to spit on. - Marvin Lebman
Agree, for the law is costly. - William Camden
Judge me when you are perfect. - Unknown
A good lawyer is a bad neighbor. - French Proverb
Whenever law ends, tyranny begins. - John Locke
Position is nine-tenths of the law. - Archie Bunker
The good of the people is the chief law. - Cicero
Do you not know that I am above the law? - James II
Lawyers are guardians of the legal order. - Philip Wood
In law, nothing is certain but the expense. - Samuel Butler
Our ancestors ... were laborers, not lawyers. - Thomas Jefferson
A government of law is a government of lawyers. - Saying
Lawyers are the foot soldiers of our Constitution. - Rennard Strickland
The law must be stable, but it must not stand still. - Roscoe Pound
Judge a man by his questions rather than his answers. - Voltaire
Lawyers are in the business of advocacy, not judgment. - Allan C Hutchinson
Law of Inflation: Whatever goes up will go up some more. - Kin Hubbard
Life without books, chocolate and coffee is just useless. - Nadun Lokuliyanage
Coffee is a beverage that puts one to sleep when not drank. - Alphonse Allais
It is a secret worth knowing, that lawyers rarely go to law. - Moses Crowell
I can have peace of mind only when I forgive rather than judge. - Gerald Jampolsky
Death is not the end. There remains the litigation over the estate. - Ambrose Bierce
You can not stop the spread of an idea by passing a law against it. - Harry S Truman
Tragedy: a busload of lawyers going over a cliff with an empty seat. - Unknown
Books should be tried by a judge and jury as though they were crimes. - Samuel Butler
Layers are the only persons in whom ignorance of the law is not punished. - Jeremy Bentham
The only stable state is the one in which all men are equal before the law. - Aristotle
You cannot live without the lawyers, and certainly you cannot die without them. - Joseph H Choate
Time is money, especially when you're talking to a lawyer or an accountant. - Joe-kster
Lawyers are operators of toll bridges which anyone in search of justice must pass. - Jane Bryant Quinn
It is the trade of lawyers to question everything, yield nothing, and talk by the hour. - Thomas Jefferson
My husband and I had our best sex during our divorce. It was like cheating on our lawyers. - Priscilla Lopez
If this is coffee, please bring me some tea. But if this is tea, please bring me some coffee. - Abraham Lincoln
At his best, man is the noblest of all animals; separated from law and justice he is the worst. - Aristotle
You are the one who calls the law of attraction into action, and you do it through your thoughts. - Rhonda Byrne
I learned law so well, the day I graduated I used the college, won the case, and got my tuition back. - Fred Allen
Children begin by loving their parents; after a time they judge them; rarely, if ever, do they forgive them. - Oscar Wilde
The legal system is often a mystery, and we, its priests, preside over rituals baffling to everyday citizens. - Henry G. Miller
A lawyer's duty is to read the law well himself, then tell the people what it is, and let them act upon it. - Brigham Young
There are not enough jails, not enough policemen, not enough courts to enforce a law not supported by the people. - Hubert H Humphrey
The minute you read something that you can't understand, you can almost be sure that it was drawn up by a lawyer. - Will Rogers
No oppression is so heavy or lasting as that which is inflicted by the perversion and exorbitance of legal authority. - Joseph Addison
The courtrooms of America all too often have Piper Cub advocates trying to handle the controls of Boeing 747 litigation. - Warren E. Burger
How lawyers make work for one another! You're all priests, worshipping the same god. No wonder you adore one another. - Joyce Carol Oates
If we judge ourselves only by our aspirations and everyone else only their conduct we shall soon reach a very false conclusion. - Calvin Coolidge
Anyone who takes it on himself, on his own authority, to break a bad law, thereby authorizes everyone else to break the good ones. - Denis Diderot
A nation that is afraid to let its people judge the truth and falsehood in an open market is a nation that is afraid of its people. - John F Kennedy
Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it was stupid. - Albert Einstein
Music is amoral law. It gives soul to the universe, wings to the mind, flight to the imagination, and charm and gaiety to life and to everything. - Plato
The Post Office just recalled their newest stamps. They had a picture of lawyers on them, and people couldn't figure out which side to spit on. - Marvin Lebman
see also Coffee & Judge Sections
Justice Is Blind
Legal Assistance For All
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02-Mar-2021 |