[Notes from an inexperienced Seattle chili taster named Frank who was visiting Texas...] Texas is as odd as it is vast. - Henry Rollins Olfactory: Texas petroleum refinery - Daffynitions joe-ks.com The people of Texas want us to secede! - William Clements You can always tell a Texan, but not much. - Unknown Parts of Texas look like Kansas with a goiter. - Unknown I never saw anything funnier than Texas politics. - Molly Ivins Texas is a hotbed of insanely good bands and musicians. - Henry Rollins Calling a taxi in Texas is like calling a rabbi in Iraq. - Fran Lebowitz In plain Texas talk, it's 'do the right thing'. - Ross Perot I'm super laid back. I'm from Texas. I love my family. - Selena Gomez In Texas it's always hot, dry, sunny, not a cloud in the sky. - Piper Perabo I love Cincinnati, but you can keep that spaghetti chili product. - Ron White Texas is now a cornerstone of the electoral college for Republicans. - Ed Gillespie You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans. - George Carlin We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in California and mine is in Texas. - Red Skelton News events are like Texas weather. If you don't like it, wait a minute. - Jessica Savitch You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't. - Jeff Foxworthy The landscape of Texas is in all my work. It's that light; it's that sky. - Robert Wilson Texas has yet to learn submission to any oppression, come from what source it may. - Sam Houston How can you look at the Texas legislature and still believe in intelligent design? - Kinky Friedman Being from Texas, I would say I favor a pair of jeans you can wear some boots with. - Jensen Ackles I thought I knew Texas pretty well, but I had no notion of its size until I campaigned it. - Ann Richards Texas could exist without the United States but the United States cannot exist without Texas. - Sam Houston The definition of insanity in Texas is so insane that it's impossible to be insane in Texas. - Malcolm McDowell I'm from Texas, and one of the reasons I like Texas is because there's no one in control. - Willie Nelson Most of my memories of Texas are of mosquitoes, watermelons, crickets, and my brother teasing me. - Robin Wright You might be a redneck if your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather. - Jeff Foxworthy Good thing we've still got politics in Texas - finest form of free entertainment ever invented. - Molly Ivins I don't think I'm a celebrity. I'm just a guy from east Texas who loves cars and airplanes. - Carroll Shelby When I make a vow to God, then I would suggest to you that's even stronger than a handshake in Texas. - Rick Perry You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it. - Jeff Foxworthy You can take the girl out of Texas but not the Texas out of the girl and ultimately not the girl out of Texas. - Janine Turner The reason gas prices are so high is because the oil is in Texas and Oklahoma and all the dipsticks are in Washington. - Yakov Smirnoff You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze Mancation: A man's vacation. Generally includes lots of beer, a Redneck grill, slabs of meat for cooking and a sack of fireworks. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com I've got this thing for spicy stuff. Now, if you give me hot chocolate with chili pepper, a book and a bubble bath, I'm a happy girl. - Shiloh Walker Hypothesis: 1. First thing a Redneck teenager says to his father on the phone; 2. Hippo, horse; thesis, placing: putting something on a horse. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com The sky in Texas is the most amazing sky in the whole country, I think, like you can see more sky in Texas than you can see anywhere else in the world. - dina Menzel The pleasure of jogging and running is rather like that of wearing a fur coat in Texas in August: the true joy comes in being able to take the damn thing off. - Joseph Epstein If you want to surf, move to Hawaii. If you like to shop, move to New York. If you like acting and Hollywood, move to California. But if you like college football, move to Texas. - Ricky Williams see also Chili, Redneck & Stress Sections “BIG” Texas Rattlesnake Chili Cheater My Daughter & My Money Only In Texas Redneck Porch Hunter Survivor - Texas Style (2013) Texas Bank Security Texas Drought Texas Hunting Vehicle Texas Office Chair Texas Outhouse Art Texas Wink Why We Live in Texas |
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