Bear Praise

Survival kit for bears


Jack loved to hunt. Every winter he went out with his friends on the weekends looking for bear. One weekend, he couldn’t find a friend to go with, so he went out into the woods himself.

In the middle of a forest, he was taking a break when suddenly he was confronted by the largest, meanest looking bear he had ever seen. In his fear, all attempts to shoot the bear were unsuccessful.

Finally, he turned and ran as fast as he could in a vain attempt to outrun the bear. Jack ran and ran and ran, until he ended up at the edge of a very steep cliff. His hopes were dim.

Seeing no way out of his predicament, and with the bear closing in rather quickly, Jack got down on his knees, opened his arms, and exclaimed, “Dear Lord! Please give this bear some *religion*!”

The skies darkened and there was lightning in the air. Just a few feet short of Jack, the bear came to an abrupt stop, and glanced around, somewhat confused. He seemed to have become very calm and friendly...

Suddenly, the bear looked up into the sky, put his paws together, bent his head and said, “Thank you, Lord, for the food I am about to receive.”


QuotaBills
damn with faint praise - Alexander Pope

Support the right to arm bears. - Unknown

The best way to get praise is to die. - Italian Proverb

Praise the ripe field, not the green corn. - Unknown

I will praise any man that will praise me. - William Shakespeare

In doing what we ought we deserve no praise. - St. Augustine

My parents put a live teddy bear in my crib. - Woody Allen

Survival is a major contributor to longevity. - Unknown

A puff of wind and popular praise weigh the same. - English Proverb

Humor is one of the best ingredients of survival. - Aung San Suu Kyi

Thanks, Darth Obvious. Or is it Emperor Palpable? - Chuck Wendig

Every survival kit should include a sense of humor. - Unknown

It is more difficult to praise rightly than to blame. - Thomas Fuller

A classic is a book which people praise and don't read. - Mark Twain

We come not to mourn our dead soldiers, but to praise them. - Francis A Walker

Praise is the only gift for which people are really grateful. - Marguerite

The measure of a man is the way he bears up under misfortune. - Plutarch

It is simpler and easier to flatter people than to praise them. - Jean Paul Richter

For all that has been - thanks.
For all that will be - yes. - Dag Hammarskjold

It has yet to be proven that intelligence has any survival value. - Arthur C. Clarke

It is not clear that intelligence has any long-term survival value. - Stephen Hawking

Most people would rather be ruined by praise than saved by criticism. - Unknown

The silence of a man who loves to praise is a censure sufficiently severe. - Charlotte Lennox

Thanks to this man I've gone from over-the-counter to over-the-barrel. - Unknown

Wake at dawn with a winged heart and give thanks for another day of loving. - Unknown

Bulls and bears aren't responsible for as many stock losses as bum steers. - Olin Miller

It's not the bulls or the bears you need to avoid, it's the bum steers. - Chuck Hillis

To be blind is not miserable; not to be able to bear blindness, that is miserable. - John Milton

The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate. - Oprah Winfrey

Praise the Lord. Blessed is the man who fears the Lord, who finds great delight in his commands. - Bible

You can't let praise or criticism get to you. It's a weakness to get caught up in either one. - John Wooden

Your majesty, I thank you from the bottom of my heart, and Madame Houde thanks you from her bottom too. - Camillein Houde

Let us be of good cheer, remembering that the misfortunes hardest to bear are those that will never happen. - James Russell Lowell

Drunk Man: "I can't bear fools."
Dorothy Parker: "Apparently your mother could." - Dorothy Parker

We deem those happy who, from the experience of life, have learned to bear its ills, without being overcome by them. - Juvenal

Even if my strength should fail, my daring will win me praise: in might enterprises even the will to succeed is enough. - Propertius

When I am afraid, I will trust in you. In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I will not be afraid. What can mortal man do to me? - Bible

Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art. It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things that give value to survival. - C S Lewis

The chief ingredients in the composition of those qualities that gain esteem and praise, are good nature, truth, good sense, and good breeding. - Joseph Addison

If you think that nobility consists of having sixteen ancestors rather than merit, great Prince, then you may - and you may also praise or condemn me. - Franz Grillparzer


see also   Bear  &  Safety   Sections
Bear Pinata
Bear Print
Bear Protection
Canadian Food Chain
Canadian High Five
Golf Gimme
Grizzly Bear Chair
I Found A Bear Cub!
Russian Car Pool
Salmon Fight

 

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24-Jan-2020