Not long ago and far away, Santa was getting ready for his annual trip ... but there were problems everywhere. Four of his elves got sick and the trainee elves did not produce the toys as fast as the regular ones, so Santa was beginning to feel the pressure of being behind schedule. Santa's Guh-nomes - Archie Bunker In heaven an angel is nobody in particular. - George Bernard Shaw Christmas comes, but once a year is enough. - American Proverb A baby's laugh is an angel's voice. - Unknown A turkey never voted for an early Christmas. - Unknown Every time a bell rings, an angel gets his wings. - It's a Wonderful Life Never drive faster than your guardian angel can fly. - Unknown I get really grinchy right up until Christmas morning. - Dan Aykroyd Halloween starts earlier and earlier, just like Christmas. - Robert Englund All that I am or ever hope to be, I owe to my angel mother. - Abraham Lincoln I'm going to the North Pole to help out Santa this year. - Jimmy Fallon I'm walking backwards for Christmas Across the Irish Sea. - Spike Milligan Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people only once a year. - Victor Borge A nurse will always give us hope, an angel with a stethoscope. - Terri Guillemets Trust no friend without faults, and love a woman, but no angel. - Doris Lessing Nothing's as mean as giving a little child something useful for Christmas. - Kin Hubbard The question is this: Is man an ape or an angel? I am on the side of the angels. - Benjamin Disraeli Mail your packages early, so the Post Office can lose them in time for Christmas. - Johnny Carson The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live. - George Carlin If my Valentine you won't be, I'll hang myself on your Christmas tree. - Ernest Hemingway Aren't we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa. - Bart Simpson I built my church on Easter services, Christmas Eve services, and Norman Vincent Peale. - Robert H. Schuller True and solemn meaning of Christmas, which is a time for peace and quiet contemptation. - Archie Bunker Every blade of grass has its angel that bends over it and whispers, 'Grow, grow.' - Talmud If 'ifs and buts' were 'candy and nuts', we'd have Christmas every day. - Unknown Humans need fantasy to be human. To be the place where the falling angel meets the rising ape. - Terry Pratchett The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing. - Steven Wright I still have my Christmas Tree. I looked at it today. Sure enough, I couldn't see any forests. - Steven Wright No matter how carefully you stored the lights last year, they will be snarled again this Christmas. - Robert Kirby The Christmas season has come to mean the period when the public plays Santa Claus to the merchants. - John Andrew Holmes The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a family all wrapped up in each other. - Bill Vaughan An angel is a spiritual creature created by God without a body for the service of Christendom and the church. - Leo Rosten Might make a real good Christmas present for the uninformed. The book is called 'Taking America Back.' - Paul Harvey I gave my young nephew a book for Christmas. He's spent six months looking for where to put the batteries. - Milton Berle I'm owned by the people. I mean, I'm telling you, I'm no angel, but I'm gonna do right by them. - Donald Trump A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together. - Garrison Keillor Did you read about Starbucks? No more "Merry Christmas" at Starbucks. No more. Maybe we should boycott Starbucks. - Donald Trump I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my autograph. - Shirley Temple I am good, but not an angel. I do sin, but I am not the devil. I am just a small girl in a big world trying to find someone to love. - Marilyn Monroe Canadian Christmas Tree Candle-lit Christmas Tree Christmas Fruit Tree ChristMoose Tree CPU Tree Light Christmas Tree Redneck Christmas Lights Redneck Christmas Tree |
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