Amish Elevator View

What goes up “better” come down

An Amish boy and his father were visiting a mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and then slide back together again.

The boy asked, “What is this, Father?”
The father (never having seen an elevator) responded, “Son, I have never seen anything like this in my life - I don’t know what it is.”

While the boy and his father were watching with amazement, a fat old lady in a wheelchair rolled up to the moving walls and pressed a button. The walls opened and the lady rolled between them into a small room. The walls closed and the boy and his father watched the small circular numbers above the walls light up sequentially. They continued to watch until it reached the last number and then the numbers began to light in the reverse order. Finally the walls opened up again and a gorgeous, voluptuous 24-year-old blonde woman stepped out.

The father, not taking his eyes off the young woman, said quietly to his son, “Go get your mother.”

QuotaBills
Wisdom requires the long view. - John F. Kennedy

Woman was God's second mistake. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

A woman's work is never done - by men. - Unknown

A woman needs a man like a fish needs a net. - Cynthia Heimel

A man's only as old as the woman he feels. - Groucho Marx

I think Queen Elizabeth II is a charming woman. - Malcolm Muggeridge

A man without a woman is like a neck without a pain. - WC Fields

A woman who strives to be like a man lacks ambition. - Unknown

When the devil finds a lazy woman, he puts her to work. - Russian Proverb

A woman's best protection is a little money of her own. - Clare B Luce

If you can make a woman laugh, you can make her do anything. - Marilyn Monroe

A friend is one who sees through you and still enjoys the view. - Wilma Askinas

A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke. - Groucho Marx

There is no force more powerful than a woman determined to rise. - Unknown

I've never struck a woman in my life, not even my own mother. - WC Fields

It is much easier to take care of a sackful of fleas than a woman. - German Proverb

The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it. - Dudley Moore

Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them. - Unknown

Break the ice in a crowded elevator by asking how much everyone weighs. - Bill Murray

At Motel 6 in Amish Country, I wonder if they leave the light on for you? - Jay London

A woman must have money and a room of her own if she is to write fiction. - Virginia Woolf

I think gay marriage is something that should be between a man and a woman. - Arnold Schwarzenegger

Coquette: A woman without a heart, who makes a fool of a man who has no head - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Bimbo: Any woman to whom you pay a compliment, while in the company of your wife - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A man's face is his autobiography. A woman's face is her work of fiction. - Oscar Wilde

Co-Operation: An exchange between a woman and a man in which she coos and he operates - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The Book of Life begins with a man and woman in a garden, and it ends with Revelations. - Oscar Wilde

In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man; if you want anything done, ask a woman. - Margaret Thatcher

I have the body but of a weak and feeble woman, but I have the heart and stomach of a King. - Elizabeth I

You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen, which doesn't say much for you. - Groucho Marx

By the time a woman realizes her mother was right, she has a daughter who thinks she's wrong. - Unknown

Sex between a man and a woman can be wonderful, provided you get between the right man and the right woman. - Woody Allen

No man succeeds without a good woman behind him. Wife or mother, if it is both, he is twice blessed indeed. - Godfrey Winn

A mother takes twenty years to make a man of her boy, and another woman makes a fool of him in twenty minutes. - Robert Frost

Career Woman: One who goes out and earns a man's salary instead of sitting at home and taking it away from him - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Time and trouble will tame an advanced young woman, but an advanced old woman is uncontrollable by any earthly force. - Dorothy L Sayers

I wore a thong and a bra and a wig. Those things hurt. I mean, thongs? Like, they dig in. It takes a tough man to be a woman. - Hank Azaria

The more the diamond is cut the brighter it sparkles; and in what seems hard dealing, there God has no end in view but to perfect His people. - Thomas Guthrie

Never play cards with a man called Doc, never eat at a place called Mom's, and never sleep with a woman whose troubles are worse than your own. - Nelson Algren

Advice from a tree:
- Stand tall and proud
- Go out on a limb
- Remember your roots
- Drink plenty of water
- Enjoy the view - Unknown


see also   Amish & Mennonite   Section
Amish 3 Horsepower Country Camper
Amish Airlines – Maiden Voyage
Amish Centerfold
Amish Friends
Amish Man’s Occupation
Amish Mechanical Problems
Amish Prom Limo
Amish Smart Car
Looking For Your Wife?

 

Sunset Eclipse

Ikea Blueprint

Flight of the Ladybug

Nerve Twitch

Yellowstone Bears

Kayak Funeral

Dutch Bike

Breadlace

Sled Dog

Hog Hunter

Magic Puppies

Log Sticks

Tree Face

Camper Tank

Shipley Donut Pants
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26-May-2022