An Amish lady is trotting down the road in her horse and buggy when she is pulled over by a cop.
“Ma’am, I’m not going to ticket you, but I do have to issue you a warning. You have a broken reflector on your buggy.”
“Oh, I’ll let my husband, Jacob, know as soon as I get home.”
“That’s fine. Another thing, ma’am. I don’t like the way that one rein loops across the horse’s back and around one of his testicles. I consider that animal abuse. That’s cruelty to animals. Have your husband take care of that right away!”
Later that day, the lady is home telling her husband about her encounter with the cop.
“Well, dear, what exactly did he say?”
“He said the reflector is broken.”
“I can fix that in two minutes. What else?”
“I’m not sure, Jacob... something about the emergency brake...”
Trojan Horse: A phony pony - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Nag: A woman with no horse sense - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Reindeer: A horse with a hat rack - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Installment: Putting a horse in his stall - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Why, I'd horse-whip you if I had a horse. - Groucho Marx
The speed of a runaway horse counts for nothing. - Jean Cocteau
The old horse in the stable still yearns to run. - Mongolian Proverb
Paying alimony is like feeding hay to a dead horse. - Groucho Marx
Never invest emergency savings in the stock market. - Suze Orman
I had the best buffalo horse that ever made a track. - Buffalo Bill
This is really a lovely horse. I once rode her mother. - Ted Walsh
You don't have to have been a horse to be a jockey. - Arigo Saachi
Life is like a horse - either you ride it or it rides you. - Unknown
Horse Manure: 50p per pre-packed bag. 20p - do it your self. - Unknown
Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight, and bull-strong. - Unknown
Coward: One who, in a perilous emergency, thinks with his legs. - Ambrose Bierce
The only thing worse than beating a dead horse is betting on one. - Relient K
You can not lead a battle if you think you look silly on a horse. - Napoleon Bonaparte
Riding: The art of keeping a horse between yourself and the ground - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
The power of music feels like taking a a nice brake from this busy world. - Millie DeWitt
At Motel 6 in Amish Country, I wonder if they leave the light on for you? - Jay London
Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people. - WC Fields
A horse doesn't care how much you know until it knows how much you care. - Tom Smith
There is nothing so strong or safe in an emergency of life as the simple truth. - Charles Dickens
Perspective is to painting what the bridle is to the horse, the rudder to a ship. - Leonardo da Vinci
Here lies the body of Jonathan Blake.
Stepped on the gas instead of the brake. - Jonathan Blake
Sherbet: 1. A horse that can't lose; 2. A tip on a horse race or sporting event. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
The one thing I do not want to be called is First Lady. It sounds like a saddle horse. - Jacqueline Kennedy
Thank you, horseradish, for being neither a radish nor a horse. What you are is a liar food. - Jimmy Fallon
Good Secretary: A stenographer who must think like a man, act like a lady, and work like a horse - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
A definite purpose, like blinders on a horse, inevitably narrows its possessor's point of view. - Robert Frost
One of the tests of leadership is the ability to recognize a problem before it becomes an emergency. - Arnold H. Glasow
When Henry Ford made cheap, reliable cars people said, 'Nah, what's wrong with a horse?' - Elon Musk
Democracy is very different in U.S. and A. from Kazakhstan. In America, woman can vote, but horse cannot! - Borat Sagdiyev
I have left orders to be awakened at any time in case of national emergency, even if I'm in a cabinet meeting. - Ronald Reagan
Flaming enthusiasm, backed up by horse sense and persistence, is the quality that most frequently makes for success. - Dale Carnegie
A fly, Sir, may sting a stately horse and make him wince; but, one is but an insect, and the other is a horse still. - Samuel Johnson
Horse: 1. An oatsmobile; 2. An animal that cannot say yes, only neigh; 3. An animal that goes to bed with its shoes on. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
When you're young and you fall off a horse, you may break something. When you're my age and you fall off, you splatter. - Roy Rogers
Hypothesis: 1. First thing a Redneck teenager says to his father on the phone; 2. Hippo, horse; thesis, placing: putting something on a horse. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Nag: A woman with no horse sense - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Reindeer: A horse with a hat rack - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Installment: Putting a horse in his stall - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Why, I'd horse-whip you if I had a horse. - Groucho Marx
The speed of a runaway horse counts for nothing. - Jean Cocteau
The old horse in the stable still yearns to run. - Mongolian Proverb
Paying alimony is like feeding hay to a dead horse. - Groucho Marx
Never invest emergency savings in the stock market. - Suze Orman
I had the best buffalo horse that ever made a track. - Buffalo Bill
This is really a lovely horse. I once rode her mother. - Ted Walsh
You don't have to have been a horse to be a jockey. - Arigo Saachi
Life is like a horse - either you ride it or it rides you. - Unknown
Horse Manure: 50p per pre-packed bag. 20p - do it your self. - Unknown
Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight, and bull-strong. - Unknown
Coward: One who, in a perilous emergency, thinks with his legs. - Ambrose Bierce
The only thing worse than beating a dead horse is betting on one. - Relient K
You can not lead a battle if you think you look silly on a horse. - Napoleon Bonaparte
Riding: The art of keeping a horse between yourself and the ground - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
The power of music feels like taking a a nice brake from this busy world. - Millie DeWitt
At Motel 6 in Amish Country, I wonder if they leave the light on for you? - Jay London
Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people. - WC Fields
A horse doesn't care how much you know until it knows how much you care. - Tom Smith
There is nothing so strong or safe in an emergency of life as the simple truth. - Charles Dickens
Perspective is to painting what the bridle is to the horse, the rudder to a ship. - Leonardo da Vinci
Here lies the body of Jonathan Blake.
Stepped on the gas instead of the brake. - Jonathan Blake
Sherbet: 1. A horse that can't lose; 2. A tip on a horse race or sporting event. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
The one thing I do not want to be called is First Lady. It sounds like a saddle horse. - Jacqueline Kennedy
Thank you, horseradish, for being neither a radish nor a horse. What you are is a liar food. - Jimmy Fallon
Good Secretary: A stenographer who must think like a man, act like a lady, and work like a horse - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
A definite purpose, like blinders on a horse, inevitably narrows its possessor's point of view. - Robert Frost
One of the tests of leadership is the ability to recognize a problem before it becomes an emergency. - Arnold H. Glasow
When Henry Ford made cheap, reliable cars people said, 'Nah, what's wrong with a horse?' - Elon Musk
Democracy is very different in U.S. and A. from Kazakhstan. In America, woman can vote, but horse cannot! - Borat Sagdiyev
I have left orders to be awakened at any time in case of national emergency, even if I'm in a cabinet meeting. - Ronald Reagan
Flaming enthusiasm, backed up by horse sense and persistence, is the quality that most frequently makes for success. - Dale Carnegie
A fly, Sir, may sting a stately horse and make him wince; but, one is but an insect, and the other is a horse still. - Samuel Johnson
Horse: 1. An oatsmobile; 2. An animal that cannot say yes, only neigh; 3. An animal that goes to bed with its shoes on. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
When you're young and you fall off a horse, you may break something. When you're my age and you fall off, you splatter. - Roy Rogers
Hypothesis: 1. First thing a Redneck teenager says to his father on the phone; 2. Hippo, horse; thesis, placing: putting something on a horse. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
see also Amish, Horse & Mechanic Sections
Amish 3 Horsepower Country Camper
Amish Airlines – Maiden Voyage
Amish Elevator View
Amish Friends
Amish Man’s Occupation
Amish Prom Limo
Amish Smart Car
Fire Truck Parts
 Tenacity |  Better Call Saul |  Hair Notes |  Gold Silk Fabric |  Orthodox Weapon |
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28-Nov-2021 |