An Amish lady is trotting down the road in her horse and buggy when she is pulled over by a cop.
“Ma’am, I’m not going to ticket you, but I do have to issue you a warning. You have a broken reflector on your buggy.”
“Oh, I’ll let my husband, Jacob, know as soon as I get home.”
“That’s fine. Another thing, ma’am. I don’t like the way that one rein loops across the horse’s back and around one of his testicles. I consider that animal abuse. That’s cruelty to animals. Have your husband take care of that right away!”
Later that day, the lady is home telling her husband about her encounter with the cop.
“Well, dear, what exactly did he say?”
“He said the reflector is broken.”
“I can fix that in two minutes. What else?”
“I’m not sure, Jacob... something about the emergency brake...”
Whoa! A brake for horses - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Install: Where you keep your horse - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Use a little of your horse's sense. - Archie Bunker
A Horse! A Horse! My kingdom for a horse! - William Shakespeare
Life looks better from the back of a horse. - Unknown
Stabilized: A horse that's been locked in - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
A unicorn is just a horse with a point of view. - Ron Sexsmith
Care shouldn't start in the emergency room. - James Douglas
The speed of a runaway horse counts for nothing. - Jean Cocteau
The old horse in the stable still yearns to run. - Mongolian Proverb
Never invest emergency savings in the stock market. - Suze Orman
Giftedness is your accelerator; wisdom is your brake. - Gerald Brooks
You don't have to have been a horse to be a jockey. - Arigo Saachi
A rabbit's foot is a poor substitute for horse sense. - Unknown
Life is like a horse - either you ride it or it rides you. - Unknown
Horse Manure: 50p per pre-packed bag. 20p - do it your self. - Unknown
Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight, and bull-strong. - Unknown
Coward: One who, in a perilous emergency, thinks with his legs. - Ambrose Bierce
You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink. - English Proverb
The only thing worse than beating a dead horse is betting on one. - Relient K
It's too late to close the stable door after the horse has bolted. - French Proverb
Unicorn: 1. A single blemish on the foot; 2. A horse with a point of view. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people. - WC Fields
You can lead a horse to water but I'd rather ride it to the liquor store. - Wayne Nowazek
In fifty years, he never worked a day. To him, nine to five was odds on a horse. - Archie Bunker
To God I speak Spanish, to women Italian, to men French, and to my horse - German. - Emperor Charles V
You've got to concentrate on one idea. You can't ride a horse with two asses. - Joe Segal
The one thing I do not want to be called is First Lady. It sounds like a saddle horse. - Jacqueline Kennedy
A horse gallops with his lungs, perseveres with his heart, and wins with his character. - Tesio
Thank you, horseradish, for being neither a radish nor a horse. What you are is a liar food. - Jimmy Fallon
An Irishman after trying American beer for the first time: "Put it back in the horse!" - Unknown
It is not best that we should all think alike; it is differences of opinion that make horse races. - Mark Twain
When Henry Ford made cheap, reliable cars people said, 'Nah, what's wrong with a horse?' - Elon Musk
My husband is so good at home repairs that they have a special VIP area for him in the emergency room. - Unknown
Democracy is very different in U.S. and A. from Kazakhstan. In America, woman can vote, but horse cannot! - Borat Sagdiyev
Like the old adverb, "you can lead a gift horse to the water but ya can't look in his mouth." - Archie Bunker
Do you ever get halfway through eating a horse and go, 'You know, I'm not as hungry as I thought I was'? - Tim Vinel
I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone. - Steven Wright
When you're young and you fall off a horse, you may break something. When you're my age and you fall off, you splatter. - Roy Rogers
The best way to meet a woman is in an emergency situation - if you're in a shipwreck, or you find yourself behind enemy lines, or in a flood. - Mark Helprin
Install: Where you keep your horse - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Use a little of your horse's sense. - Archie Bunker
A Horse! A Horse! My kingdom for a horse! - William Shakespeare
Life looks better from the back of a horse. - Unknown
Stabilized: A horse that's been locked in - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
A unicorn is just a horse with a point of view. - Ron Sexsmith
Care shouldn't start in the emergency room. - James Douglas
The speed of a runaway horse counts for nothing. - Jean Cocteau
The old horse in the stable still yearns to run. - Mongolian Proverb
Never invest emergency savings in the stock market. - Suze Orman
Giftedness is your accelerator; wisdom is your brake. - Gerald Brooks
You don't have to have been a horse to be a jockey. - Arigo Saachi
A rabbit's foot is a poor substitute for horse sense. - Unknown
Life is like a horse - either you ride it or it rides you. - Unknown
Horse Manure: 50p per pre-packed bag. 20p - do it your self. - Unknown
Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight, and bull-strong. - Unknown
Coward: One who, in a perilous emergency, thinks with his legs. - Ambrose Bierce
You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink. - English Proverb
The only thing worse than beating a dead horse is betting on one. - Relient K
It's too late to close the stable door after the horse has bolted. - French Proverb
Unicorn: 1. A single blemish on the foot; 2. A horse with a point of view. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people. - WC Fields
You can lead a horse to water but I'd rather ride it to the liquor store. - Wayne Nowazek
In fifty years, he never worked a day. To him, nine to five was odds on a horse. - Archie Bunker
To God I speak Spanish, to women Italian, to men French, and to my horse - German. - Emperor Charles V
You've got to concentrate on one idea. You can't ride a horse with two asses. - Joe Segal
The one thing I do not want to be called is First Lady. It sounds like a saddle horse. - Jacqueline Kennedy
A horse gallops with his lungs, perseveres with his heart, and wins with his character. - Tesio
Thank you, horseradish, for being neither a radish nor a horse. What you are is a liar food. - Jimmy Fallon
An Irishman after trying American beer for the first time: "Put it back in the horse!" - Unknown
It is not best that we should all think alike; it is differences of opinion that make horse races. - Mark Twain
When Henry Ford made cheap, reliable cars people said, 'Nah, what's wrong with a horse?' - Elon Musk
My husband is so good at home repairs that they have a special VIP area for him in the emergency room. - Unknown
Democracy is very different in U.S. and A. from Kazakhstan. In America, woman can vote, but horse cannot! - Borat Sagdiyev
Like the old adverb, "you can lead a gift horse to the water but ya can't look in his mouth." - Archie Bunker
Do you ever get halfway through eating a horse and go, 'You know, I'm not as hungry as I thought I was'? - Tim Vinel
I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone. - Steven Wright
When you're young and you fall off a horse, you may break something. When you're my age and you fall off, you splatter. - Roy Rogers
The best way to meet a woman is in an emergency situation - if you're in a shipwreck, or you find yourself behind enemy lines, or in a flood. - Mark Helprin
see also Amish, Horse & Mechanic Sections
Amish 3 Horsepower Country Camper
Amish Airlines – Maiden Voyage
Amish Elevator View
Amish Friends
Amish Man’s Occupation
Amish Prom Limo
Amish Smart Car
Fire Truck Parts
 Chair Boy |  Cheers Beer |  African Airstrip |  Horsepower vs Torque |  Filling Up Is OverRated |
 Flywood |  Ukraine Aid |  Handicap Motorcyclist |  Auto Warranty: New Extend-ed Coverage |  Messerschmitt |
 UNinvolved |  Plane Oops! |  Manitoba Home Security System |  Outdoor Pool |  Working From Home |
 Snowbound Train |  Smirnoff Women |  Redneck Dent Repair |  Cocktail Shirt |  Mega Samurai Sudoku Puzzles |
18-May-2022 |