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You Are What You Eat

Humour on the thin and lean side

You Are What You Eat thanks to Phil Callaway

QuotaBills
Diets are mainly food for thought. - N Wylie Jones

Americans like fat books and thin women. - Russell Baker

Laugh a lot. It burns a lot of calories. - Jessica Simpson

Mine is the least fat diet in the world. - Pierre Dukan

A balanced diet is chocolate in both hands. - Unknown

Happiness is equilibrium. Shift your weight. - Tom Stoppard

Milk without fat is like nonalcoholic Scotch. - Andy Rooney

Have great, secret, big, fat hopes for yourself. - Gloria Vanderbilt

I'm not gaining weight. I'm living large. - Unknown

My weight is perfect for my height - which varies. - Unknown

Anybody who doesn't like this book is healthy. - Groucho Marx

Eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow you may diet. - Unknown

In skating over thin ice our safety is in our speed. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The wish for healing has always been half of health. - Lucius Annaeus Seneca

Attention to health is life's greatest hindrance. - Plato

Health insurance should be a given for every citizen. - Jesse Ventura

A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat. - Erma Bombeck

Thin people are beautiful, but fat people are adorable. - Jackie Gleason

People who shop in health food stores never look healthy. - Amy Sedaris

Love is, or it ain't. Thin love ain't love at all. - Toni Morrison

I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already. - Tommy Cooper

The only thin a boyfriend was good for was a shattered heart. - Becca Fitzpatrick

The cardiologist's diet: - If it tastes good, spit it out. - Unknown

If you can't tell a spoon from a ladle, then you're fat! - Demetri Martin

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint. - Markus Herz

Sleep, riches, and health to be truly enjoyed must be interrupted. - Johann Paul Friedrich Richter

I don't diet, I just don't eat as much as I'd like to. - Linda Evangelista

Early to bed and early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise. - Benjamin Franklin

Nobody likes insurance companies, especially health insurance companies. - P.J. O'Rourke

I've been on a diet for two weeks and all I've lost is two weeks. - Totie Fields

Never let success get to your head. Never let failure get to your health. - Unknown

One of the major goals of health insurance reform is to bring down the cost. - Valerie Jarrett

Faith and knowledge lean largely upon each other in the practice of medicine. - Peter Mere Latham

A sure way to lose happiness is to want it at the expense of everything else. - Bette Davis

A mother is not a person to lean on, but a person to make leaning unnecessary. - Dorothy C Fisher

I am on a ketos diet so I avoid sugar, dairy products, wheat, grain or pulses. - Puneet Issar

Observe your dog: if he's fat, then you're not getting enough exercise. - Evan Esar

I've exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars. - Erma Bombeck

Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing. - Redd Foxx

A man's health can be judged by which he takes two at a time - pills or stairs. - Joan Welsh

The chief excitement in a woman's life is spotting women who are fatter than she is. - Helen Rowland

An old timer is one who remembers when we counted our blessings instead of our calories. - Unknown

He hath eaten me out of house and home; he hath put all my substance into that fat belly of his. - William Shakespeare

I never worry about diets. The only carrots that interest me are the number you get in a diamond. - Mae West

If fat people just gave skinny people more food, we could solve obesity and hunger at the same time. - Ashton Kutcher

Many of our fears are tissue-paper-thin, and a single courageous step would carry us clear through them. - Brendan Francis

My wife is on a diet. Coconuts and bananas. She hasn't lost any weight, but she can sure climb a tree. - Henny Youngman

Nobody can fail to lose weight in the jungle, unless they've got a secret stash of pork pies somewhere. - Colin Baker

Baloney is the unvarnished lie laid on so thick you hate it. Blarney is flattery laid on so thin you love it. - Fulton J Sheen

I don't weigh myself because most scales don't know how heavy all the grudges I'm holding onto are. - Unknown

What some call health, if purchased by perpetual anxiety about diet, isn't much better than tedious disease. - Alexander Pope

When wealth is lost, nothing is lost. When health is lost, something is lost. When character is lost, all is lost. - Rev. Billy Graham

America is a country where half the money is spent buying food, and the other half is spent trying to lose weight. - Unknown

Lord save us all from old age and broken health and a hope tree that has lost the faculty of putting out blossoms. - Mark Twain

Health is your greatest wealth, so experiencing a marathon and seeing what you're capable of is really special. - Christy Turlington

Perfect freedom is as necessary to the health and vigor of commerce as it is to the health and vigor of citizenship. - Patrick Henry

The biggest seller is cookbooks and the second is diet books - how not to eat what you've just learned now to cook. - Andy Rooney

Confidence is beautiful, no matter your size, no matter your weight. Be confident in who you are and you'll be beautiful. - Unknown

In soap, fatty acids made from boiling pork bone fat are used as a hardening agent, but also for giving it a pearl-like effect. - Christien Meindertsma

Desire is the key to motivation. It is the key to develop a healthy personality and a positive attitude towards oneself and others. - Amit Abraham

I'm off the diet, but not the treadmill. I speak as someone who's attempted to lose weight and get fit thrice before in my life. - Ronnie Screwvala

Every essential oil has a healing purpose. I think it's a great gift because it's something that elevates your mood and your health. - Yolanda Hadid

Sexiness wears thin after a while and beauty fades, but to be married to a man who make you laugh every day, ah, now that's a real treat. - Joanne Woodward

Health is the finest possession. Contentment is the ultimate wealth. Trustworthy people are the best relatives. Unbinding is the supreme ease. - Buddha

Our food pyramid, the kind of diet that is constantly promoted, is completely warped. It's not based around anything to do with healing your body. - Jessica Origliasso


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