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Purrfect Valentine

A heart rendering story

Purrfect Valentine thanks to Marlene Goodman

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A meowing cat catches no mice. - Yiddish proverb

International Spade The Cat Week - Archie Bunker

All cats appear grey in the dark. - English Proverb

Meow means "woof" in cat. - George Carlin

When the cat dies, the mice rejoice. - African saying

Cataract: Where cats hang their coats. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

When the cat's away, the mice will play. - French Proverb

A cat bitten once by a snake dreads even rope. - Arab Proverb

A cat is a puzzle for which there is no solution. - Hazel Nicholson

First Aid Kit: A cat that works for the Red Cross. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Going to law is losing a cow for the sake of a cat. - Mark Twain

Dogs can't operate an MRI machine but cats can. - Unknown

No amount of time can erase the memory of a good cat. - Leo Dworkin

Women's clothes: never wear anything that panics the cat. - P.J. O'Rourke

Valentine's Day is like Armistice Day - you declare a truce. - Milton Berle

Without Valentine's Day, February would be... well, January. - Jim Gaffigan

People that hate cats will come back as mice in their next life. - Faith Resnick

If the cat sits long enough at the hole, it will catch the mouse. - Irish proverb

A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats. - Benjamin Franklin

A dog is a man's best friend. A cat is a cat's best friend. - Robert J Vogel

A lame cat is better than a swift horse when rats infest the palace. - Chinese Proverb

There's no need for a piece of sculpture in a home that has a cat. - Wesley Bates

It was a great interview process. They were fighting like cats and dogs. - Donald Trump

There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats. - Albert Schweitzer

Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a function. - Garrison Keillor

A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere. - Groucho Marx

It doesn't matter if a cat is black or white, so long as it catches mice. - Deng Xiaoping

The main difference between a cat and a lie is that a cat only has nine lives. - Mark Twain

Working with Julie Andrews is like getting hit over the head with a valentine. - Christopher Plummer

I'm like the kid in kindergarten; I really do send valentines to everyone. - Susie Bright

All my wife wanted for Valentine's Day was a little card - American Express. - Milton Berle

Oh, if it be to choose and call thee mine, love, thou art every day my Valentine! - Thomas Hood

In the beginning, God created man, but seeing him so feeble, He gave him the cat. - Warren Eckstein

I was such an ugly kid. When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up. - Rodney Dangerfield

Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier'n puttin' it back. - Will Rogers

If my Valentine you won't be,
I'll hang myself on your Christmas tree. - Ernest Hemingway

It is better to be a mouse in a cat's mouth than a man in a lawyer's hands. - Spanish Proverb

If man could be crossed with the cat, it would improve man, but deteriorate the cat. - Mark Twain

Sleep is like my cat. I can call him by his name, but he still won't come to me. - Shane Koyczan

On Valentine's Day, I wired flowers for my mother-in-law, but she found the fuse. - Milton Berle

I am fond of pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals. - Winston Churchill

The cat could very well be man's best friend but would never stoop to admitting it. - Doug Larson

I love cats because I enjoy my home, and little by little they become its visible soul. - Jean Cocteau

Without my Vulcan cat suit, Frankenstein wig and pointed ears, I don't get recognized. - Jolene Blalock

Always the cat remains a little beyond the limits we try to set for him in our blind folly. - Andre Norton

Skunk: 1. A streamlined cat with a 2-tone finish and a fluid drive; 2. A community scenter. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A mathematician is a blind man in a dark room looking for a black cat which isn't there. - Charles Darwin

Valentine's Day - a nice holiday because it's the first day of the rest of your wife. - Milton Berle

Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind, And therefore is winged Cupid painted blind. - William Shakespeare

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. - Robert A. Heinlein

I love Valentine's Day! I love it, I love it, I love it. I like having doors opened for me. - Ginnifer Goodwin

One of the most striking differences between a cat and a lie is that a cat has only nine lives. - Mark Twain

When I play with my cat, who knows whether she is not amusing herself with me more than I with her. - Montaigne

Why buy flowers for Valentine's Day? Just go to a cemetery and collect a dozen off a few graves. - Jarod Kintz

The thing about Valentine's day is that people discover who are single and who to feel jealous of. - Faye Morgan

When witches go riding and black cats are seen,
The moon laughs and whispers, 'tis near Halloween. - Unknown

I will be deafer than the blue-eyed cat, And thrice as blind as any noonday owl, To holy virgins in their ecstasies. - Alfred Tennyson

Valentine's Day: Rubbing singles' noses in their lack of a mate and the noses of couples in their lack of time. - Emma McLaughlin

A tom cat hijacked a plane, stuck a pistol into the pilot's ribs and demanded, "Take me to the Canaries." - Bob Monkhouse

An actor is never so great as when he reminds you of an animal - falling like a cat, lying like a dog, moving like a fox. - Francois Truffaut

I like to do things for my wife on Valentine's Day. I open the door for her when she puts laundry in the washing machine. - Milton Berle

If a dog jumps in your lap, it is because he is fond of you; but if a cat does the same thing, it is because your lap is warmer. - Alfred N Whitehead

I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles. - Steven Wright

One of my biggest fears is that I'm going to die alone in my home, and my cats will eat me because I am too dead to open their food cans. - Kelli Jae Baeli

When I hear of an 'equity' in a case like this, I am reminded of a blind man in a dark room - looking for a black cat - which isn't there. - Charles Bowen

This Valentine's Day rent a poem for your loved. They come in three sizes - small, medium, and romantic. Free refills available to Premium Members. - Jarod Kintz

Non-Muslims in Saudi Arabia can only celebrate Valentine's Day behind closed doors. Apparently, this has led to a huge black market for flowers and wrapping paper. - John Niven

Dose it ever amaze and delight you that of all the places in the world - cold grassy nests under hedgerows, warm patches of sun on a carpet - the cat chooses to sit on your lap? - Nevada Barr

Hollywood wanted to change my birthdate. I was born after Valentine's Day, so they wanted to change it to February 14. A Latin lover should be born on Valentine's Day. I said no. - Cesar Romero

I don't understand why Cupid was chosen to represent Valentine's Day. When I think about romance, the last thing on my mind is a short, chubby toddler coming at me with a weapon. - Unknown


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