Pocket Change

Marry money. - Max Shulman

No gold, no Holy Ghost. - Samuel Butler

Wisdom is better than gold or silver. - German Proverb

When money speaks, truth keeps silent. - Russian Proverb

A fool and his money are soon elected. - Will Rogers

Too much money ain't enough money. - Lil Wayne

Virtue has never as respectable as money. - Mark Twain

There might be some credit in being jolly. - Charles Dickens

Yacht: a floating box you throw money into. - Unknown

I find all this money a considerable burden. - J Paul Getty

Here's the money for our patentcy (patent). - Archie Bunker

Friendship is like money, easier made than kept. - Samuel Butler

All money is tainted, tain't none of it mine. - Thomas F. McGuire

The creditor hath a better memory than the debtor. - James Howell

Wind to a sailor is what money is to life on shore. - Sterling Hayden

Don't marry for money, you can borrow it cheaper. - Scottish Saying

Soldiers win the battles and generals get the credit. - Napoleon Bonaparte

Stop chasing the money and start chasing the passion. - Tony Hsieh

Yacht: 1. A floating debt; 2. Stretch limo of the seas. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

After money in the bank, a grudge is the next best thing. - Anthony Trollope

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker? - George Carlin

I had plastic surgery last week. I cut up my credit cards. - Henny Youngman

It's morally wrong to allow a sucker to keep his money. - WC Fields

Capitalism is using its money; we socialists throw it away. - Fidel Castro

Generosity begins with our recognition of our debt to others. - Unknown

Britain's last gold medal was a bronze in 1952 in Helsinki. - Nigel Starmer-Smith

Money is like manure. You have to spread it around or it smells. - J Paul Getty

If a little money does not go out, great money will not come in. - Chinese Proverb

If you can count your money, you don't have a billion dollars. - J Paul Getty

I spent all my money on a FAX machine. Now I can only FAX collect. - Steven Wright

I like gold because it is a stabilizer; it is an insurance policy. - Kevin O'Leary

The rich would have to eat money if the poor did not provide food. - Russia Proverb

I was a great student at a great school, Wharton School of Finance. - Donald Trump

He can't help it - he was born with a silver foot in his mouth. - George HW Bush

I have no money, no resources, no hopes. I am the happiest man alive. - Henry Miller

Economics is extremely useful as a form of employment for economists. - John Kenneth Galbraith

Never get deeply in debt to someone who cried at the end of Scarface. - Robert Wieder

There's only one thing money won't buy, and that's poverty. - Joe E Lewis

Whoever said money can't buy happiness didn't know where to shop. - Gertrude Stein

Money can't buy happiness, but it helps you look for it in more places. - Milton Berle

I have enough money to last me the rest of my life, unless I buy something. - Jackie Mason

If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning. - Aristotle Onassis

The man who never has money to pay his debts has too much of something else. - J.L. Basford

Will you marry me? Do you have any money?
Answer the second question first. - Groucho Marx

There's so little money in my bank account, my scenic checks show a ghetto. - Phyllis Diller

The world is divided into people who do things - and people who get the credit. - Dwight Morrow

I don't share blame. I don't share credit. And I don't share desserts. - Beverly Sills

Conventions are like coins, an easy way of dealing with the commerce of relations. - Freya Stark

The quickest way to double your money is to fold it and put it back in your pocket. - Will Rogers

Procrastination is like a credit card: it's a lot of fun until you get the bill. - Christopher Parker

If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to. - Dorothy Parker

With money in your pocket, you are wise and you are handsome - and you sing well too. - Yiddish Proverb

A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it. - Bob Hope

To be clever enough to get a great deal of money, one must be stupid enough to want it. - George Bernard Shaw

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke

Shopping: The fine art of acquiring things you don't need with money you don't have. - Unknown

Critics search for ages for the wrong word which, to give them credit, they eventually find. - Peter Ustinov

Half the money I spend on advertising is wasted; the trouble is, I don't know which half. - John Wannamaker

Money itself doesn't interest me. But you must make money to go on building the business. - Rupert Murdoch

I'm proud to be paying taxes. The only thing is, I could be just as proud for half the money. - Arthur Godfrey

Some people use one half their ingenuity to get into debt, and the other half to avoid paying it. - George D Prentice

Why pay money to have your family tree traced; go into politics and your opponents will do it for you. - Unknown

We shouldn't spend money on things we don't need when others don't have the things they do. - Peter Singer

Gonna be incrimated... they're gonna keep the ashes around the house in one of them silver urinals. - Archie Bunker

Save a little money each month and at the end of the year you'll be surprised at how little you have. - Ernest Haskins

There is not Communism or Marxism, but representative democracy and social justice in a well-planned economy. - Fidel Castro

I don't make deals for the money. I've got enough, much more than I'll ever need. I do it to do it. - Donald Trump

A good financial plan is a road map that shows us exactly how the choices we make today will affect our future. - Alexa Von Tobel

Work like you don't need the money. Love like you've never been hurt. Dance like nobody's watching. - Satchel Paige

Money was never a big motivation for me, except as a way to keep score. The real excitement is playing the game. - Donald Trump

My family didn't have a lot of money, and I'm grateful for that. Money is the longest route to happiness. - Evangeline Lilly

I went to the bank and reviewed my savings. I found out I have all the money I'll ever need if I die tomorrow. - Henny Youngman

No one has yet had the courage to memorialize his wealth on his tombstone. A dollar mark would not look well there. - Corra May Harris

Keeping books on social aid is capitalistic nonsense. I just use the money for the poor. I can't stop to count it. - Evita Peron

Modern poets talk against business, poor things, but all of us write for money. Beginners are subjected to trial by market. - Robert Frost

A good leader is a person who takes a little more than his share of the blame and a little less than his share of the credit. - John Maxwell

Retirement is like a long vacation in Vegas. The goal is to enjoy it to the fullest, but not so fully that you run out of money. - Jonathan Clements

A fruit is a vegetable with looks and money. Plus, if you let fruit rot, it turns into wine; something Brussels Sprouts never do. - P.J. O'Rourke

Money isn't the most important thing in life, but it's reasonably close to oxygen on the "gotta have it" scale. - Zig Ziglar

In general, the art of government consists of taking as much money as possible from one party of the citizens to give to the other. - Voltaire

Street League Skateboarding is the premier professional skateboarding league in the world, with the biggest prize money in history. - Rob Dyrdek

Only when the last tree has withered, and the last fish caught, and the last river been poisoned, will we realize we cannot eat money. - Cree Proverb

NEED now means wanting someone else's money. GREED means wanting to keep your own. COMPASSION is when a politician arranges the transfer. - Joseph Sobran

Money is like gasoline during a road trip. You don't want to run out of gas on your trip, but you're not doing a tour of gas stations. - Tim O'Reilly

Let advertisers spend the same amount of money improving their product that they do on advertising and they wouldn't need to advertise it. - Will Rogers