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Lamp Servings

Making light of today's food selection

Lamp Servings thanks to Keith Blake

QuotaBills
Never trust sheep. - Ryan Stiles

Head Cold: Rheum service - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Uniform: Sheep's clothing - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Love is a kind of military service. - Ovid

Does wine count as a serving of fruit? - Joe-kster

Eyebrows: What I do when I go shopping. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Why don't sheep shrink when it rains? - George Carlin

Liberty for wolves is death to the lambs. - Isaiah Berlin

Tailor Shop: Last of the big-time menders - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

We only serve fine wine. Did you bring any? - Unknown

Rise and rise again until lambs become lions. - Robin Hood

Inequality of knowledge is the key to a sale. - Neil O Gustafson

Room service - don't send up any more ice. - WC Fields

Better to reign in Hell, than serve in Heaven. - John Milton

Occasionally words must serve to veil the facts. - Niccolo Machiavelli

Lamb: An animal that gets more sheepish with age - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

My dream job would be the Karma delivery service. - Bill Murray

Crying is for plain women. Pretty women go shopping. - Oscar Wilde

I always say shopping is cheaper than a psychiatrist. - Tammy Faye Bakker

A shop should be like a song of which you never tire. - Harry Gordon Selfridge

Malaria: Several shopping centers close to each other - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

He that makes himself a sheep shall be eaten by a wolf. - Italian Proverb

Checkroom: Where the sheep are separated from the coats - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

There is never enough time, unless you're serving it. - Malcolm Forbes

People who shop in health food stores never look healthy. - Amy Sedaris

If nominated, I will not run; if elected, I will not serve. - William Tecumseh Sherman

The quickest way to know a woman is to go shopping with her. - Marcelene Cox

Memorial Service: Farewell party for someone who has already left. - Robert Byrne

If the lambs were flying, wolves would have also the wings to fly. - Mehmet M Ildan

It never fails - you get in the bath and there's a rub at the lamp. - Robin Williams

Goat: A lamb who has kidded himself into believing that he knows Wall Street - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Bargain Sale: A place where a woman can ruin one dress while she buys another - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Someone told me that each equation I included in the book would halve the sales. - Stephen Hawking

Marketers need to build digital relationships and reputation before closing a sale. - Chris Brogan

The apprenticeship of difficulty is one which the greatest of men have had to serve. - Samuel Smiles

If the wind will not serve, take to the oars. Destitutus ventis, remos adhibe - Latin Proverb

The service we render to others is really the rent we pay for our room on this earth. - Wilfred Grenfell

Whoever said money can't buy happiness simply didn't know where to go shopping. - Bo Derek

Shopping: The fine art of acquiring things you don't need with money you don't have. - Unknown

Democracy must be something more than two wolves and a sheep voting on what to have for dinner. - James Bovard

How utterly terrible is the current idea that Christians can serve God at their own convenience. - AW Tozer

I am not afraid of an army of lions led by a sheep. I am afraid of an army of sheep led by a lion. - Alexander the Great

Often statistics are used as a drunken man uses lamp posts… for support rather than illumination. - Andrew Lang

The real test of your character is your treatment of those who can be of no possible service to you. - Unknown

To me, job titles don't matter. Everyone is in sales. It's the only way we stay in business. - Harvey Mackay

Cigarette sales would drop to zero overnight if the warning said, "Cigarettes contain fat." - Dave Barry

I remember when the candle shop burned won. Everyone stood around singing "Happy Birthday." - Steven Wright

You get the best effort from others not by lighting a fire beneath them, but by building a fire within. - Bob Nelson

In this age, the man who dares to think for himself and to act independently does a service to his race. - John Stuart Mill

The road to medical knowledge is through the pathological museum and not through an apothecary's shop. - William Withey Gull

An angel is a spiritual creature created by God without a body for the service of Christendom and the church. - Leo Rosten

Service is the rent we pay for being. It is the very purpose of life, and not something you do in your spare time. - Marion Wright Edelman

Always serve too much hot fudge sauce on hot fudge sundaes. It makes people overjoyed, and puts them in your debt. - Judith Olney

Taxpayer - someone who works for the federal government but doesn't have to take the civil service examination. - Ronald Reagan

Waiting around to be perfect never amounts to anything. Don't be a waiter or you'll be serving other people. - Ian Desabrais

The aim of marketing is to know and understand the customer so well the product or service fits him and sells itself. - Peter F Drucker

When faith replaces doubt, when selfless service eliminates selfish striving, the power of God brings to pass His purposes. - Thomas S Monson

Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow internet service to see who they really are. - Will Ferrell

When you inhale, you are taking the strength from God. When you exhale, it represents the service you are giving to the world. - B.K. Iyengar

I'm acting when I serve as a hostess, when I run my wig business. I was born to act, and life itself is the greatest part. - Eva Gabor

We will receive not what we idly wish for but what we justly earn. Our rewards will always be in exact proportion to our service. - Earl Nightingale

The trout enjoys the river,
The whale enjoys the sea,
And dogs love most an old lamp-post,
But you're my cup of tea. - W H Auden

Fall: The season when your wife buys new winter clothes so she will have something to wear when she goes out shopping for spring outfits - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

New Pasta Diet: Just walk pasta bakery without stopping. Walk pasta candy store without stopping. Walk pasta ice cream shop without stopping. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

For you will certainly carry out God's purpose, however you act, but it makes a difference to you whether you serve like Judas or like John. - C S Lewis


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