#1 humor site on the 'net

Knock Hard

We can repair almost anything

Knock Hard thanks to Keith Blake

QuotaBills
Knock on the sky and listen to the sound. - Zen Saying

Maintenance is as much art as it is science. - Unknown

If opportunity doesn't knock, build a door. - Milton Berle

Opportunity may knock, but you must open the door. - Unknown

At the deaf man's door, knock as much as you like. - Greek Proverb

The time to repair the roof is when the sun is shining. - John F Kennedy

There’s good in everybody. Boost. Don't knock. - Warren G. Harding

It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men. - Frederick Douglass

The shortest distance between two points is usually under repair. - Unknown

Opportunities don't knock, they whisper. So shut up and listen. - Thomas Leonard

If I want to knock a story off the front page, I just change my hairstyle. - Hillary Clinton

Opportunity does not knock. It presents itself when you beat down the door. - Kyle Chandler

Never knock on death's door. Ring the bell and run away. Death hates that. - Matt Frewer

Keep your bike in good repair: motorcycle boots are not comfortable for walking. - Unknown

My mom said the only reason men are alive is for lawn care and vehicle maintenance. - Tim Allen

Some people not only expect opportunity to knock, they expect it to beat the door down. - Unknown

The best way to knock the chip off your neighbor's shoulder is to pat him on the back. - Unknown

You know that I'm at death's door. But the trouble is that I'm afraid to knock. - W Somerset Maugham

Why do dogs always race to the door when the doorbell rings? It's hardly ever for them. - Harry Hill

It's easier to build up a child than it is to repair an adult. Choose your words wisely. - Unknown

Look for opportunity. You can't wait for it to knock on the door ... You might not be home. - Jinger Heath

My mechanic told me, "I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder." - Steven Wright

Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you. - Matthew 7:7

Law of Mechanical Repair: After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

We need 4 hugs a day for survival. We need 8 hugs a day for maintenance. We need 12 hugs a day for growth. - Virginia Satir

I wouldn't pay for a personal trainer, but I would pay someone to just knock unhealthy food out of my hands. - Bill Murray

The average auto owner drives so blamed reckless I'm glad that he does git robbed when he pays a repair bill. - Kin Hubbard

There's nothing to match curling up with a good book when there's a repair job to be done around the house. - Joe Ryan

You can spend your precious energy beating down closed doors, or you can choose the doors that open when you knock. - Unknown

Don't knock the weather. Nine-tenths of the people couldn't start a conversation if it didn't change once in a while. - Kin Hubbard

With such riches as I have in life, you're always nervous. Being Irish, you're waiting for something to knock it sideways. - Pierce Brosnan

Perseverance is a great element of success; if you only knock long enough and loud enough at the gate, you are sure to wake up somebody. - Henry Wadsworth Longfellow


Martini Shirt

Mal Nutrition

Stowaway Soccer Fan

Watch Out For Slugger

Canada Frigate

Shimmy Car-nage

Texas Cow Cleaner

DogWood

The Floater

How We Played Online Before The Internet

Sports Hernias

Redneck Power Windows

Star Wars Howl

Leaning Bookshelves

Sometimes Dads Are Wet For Work

Dad Sandwich

Months Apart

Swing Dad

Dadspiration

Daddy, Can I Ride It?

Leaf Surgery

No Wheeler

Dad's Ex-Ferrari

Privileged Corvette Parking