QuotaBillsYou gotta be kitten me. - Unknown
Curiosity killed the cat. - English Proverb
A meowing cat catches no mice. - Yiddish proverb
Scratch a lover, and find a foe. - Dorothy Parker
Catacomb: A feline grooming tool - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
All cats appear grey in the dark. - English Proverb
Don't judge a cat by its coat. - Magdalena VandenBerg
Meow means "woof" in cat. - George Carlin
When the cat dies, the mice rejoice. - African saying
Cataract: Where cats hang their coats. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Happiness is having a scratch for every itch. - Ogden Nash
Chirpes: A canarial disease from kissing a canary. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Going to law is losing a cow for the sake of a cat. - Mark Twain
Dogs can't operate an MRI machine but cats can. - Unknown
Walk as if you are kissing the Earth with your feet. - Thich Nhat Hanh
No amount of time can erase the memory of a good cat. - Leo Dworkin
I wonder what fool it was that first invented kissing. - Jonathan Swift
When my enemies stop hissing, I shall know I'm slipping. - Maria Callas
Women's clothes: never wear anything that panics the cat. - P.J. O'Rourke
People that hate cats will come back as mice in their next life. - Faith Resnick
If you scratch a cynic, you'll find a disappointed idealist. - George Carlin
If the cat sits long enough at the hole, it will catch the mouse. - Irish proverb
A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats. - Benjamin Franklin
Hairball: When a cat throws up to the basketball hoop, and misses - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
A dog is a man's best friend. A cat is a cat's best friend. - Robert J Vogel
Advice is like kissing: it costs nothing and is a pleasant thing to do. - H.W. Shaw
It was a great interview process. They were fighting like cats and dogs. - Donald Trump
There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats. - Albert Schweitzer
Fill what's empty, empty what's full, and scratch where it itches. - Alice Roosevelt Longworth
Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you. - Mary Bly
Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a function. - Garrison Keillor
A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere. - Groucho Marx
It doesn't matter if a cat is black or white, so long as it catches mice. - Deng Xiaoping
If you hold a cat by the tail you learn things you cannot learn any other way. - Mark Twain
When black cats prowl and pumpkins gleam,
May luck be yours on Halloween. - Unknown
This is the machine age. The only thing people do by hand is scratch themselves. - Joe Laurie
In the beginning, God created man, but seeing him so feeble, He gave him the cat. - Warren Eckstein
Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you later. - Unknown
I was such an ugly kid. When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up. - Rodney Dangerfield
If you want to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first create the universe. - Carl Sagan
Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier'n puttin' it back. - Will Rogers
If man could be crossed with the cat, it would improve man, but deteriorate the cat. - Mark Twain
Sleep is like my cat. I can call him by his name, but he still won't come to me. - Shane Koyczan
I am fond of pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals. - Winston Churchill
The cat could very well be man's best friend but would never stoop to admitting it. - Doug Larson
I love cats because I enjoy my home, and little by little they become its visible soul. - Jean Cocteau
I have studied many philosophers and many cats. The wisdom of cats is infinitely superior. - Hippolyte Taine
Always the cat remains a little beyond the limits we try to set for him in our blind folly. - Andre Norton
Skunk: 1. A streamlined cat with a 2-tone finish and a fluid drive; 2. A community scenter. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
A mathematician is a blind man in a dark room looking for a black cat which isn't there. - Charles Darwin
Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. - Robert A. Heinlein
One of the most striking differences between a cat and a lie is that a cat has only nine lives. - Mark Twain
When I play with my cat, who knows whether she is not amusing herself with me more than I with her. - Montaigne
When witches go riding and black cats are seen,
The moon laughs and whispers, 'tis near Halloween. - Unknown
When discovered by his wife, kissing the maid, Groucho said, "I was just whispering in her mouth". - Groucho Marx
Any man who can drive safely while kissing a pretty girl is simply not giving the kiss the attention it deserves. - Albert Einstein
I will be deafer than the blue-eyed cat, And thrice as blind as any noonday owl, To holy virgins in their ecstasies. - Alfred Tennyson
A tom cat hijacked a plane, stuck a pistol into the pilot's ribs and demanded, "Take me to the Canaries." - Bob Monkhouse
The best reason for a knitter to marry is that you can't teach the cat to be impressed when you finish a lace scarf. - Stephanie Pearl-McPhee
Kissing a man with a beard is a lot like going to a picnic. You don't mind going through a little bush to get there! - Minnie Pearl
The real lover is the man who can thrill you by kissing your forehead or smiling into your eyes or just staring into space. - Marilyn Monroe
I'm amazed that my wife and I created two human beings from scratch, yet struggle to assemble the most basic of IKEA cabinets. - John Kinnear
Assmosis: The process by which some people seem to absorb success and advancement by kissing up to the boss rather than working hard. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles. - Steven Wright
I'm finally starting to scratch the surface of what women want. And I think the answer lies somewhere between conversation and chocolate. - Mel Gibson