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Don't Be A Tosser

This is rubbish in the U.K.

Don't Be A Tosser thanks to Keith Blake

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Make good use of bad rubbish. - Elizabeth Beresford

Language is a virus from outer space. - William S Burroughs

Music is the universal language of mankind. - Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

A spotless house is a sign of a misspent life. - Unknown

Problems are not stop signs, they are guidelines. - Robert H Schuller

Life is a foreign language; all men mispronounce it. - Christopher Morley

To play billiards well is a sign of ill-spent youth. - Charles Roupell

Language exerts hidden power, like a moon on the tides. - Rita Mae Brown

A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory. - Steven Wright

The art of communication is the language of leadership. - James Humes

A chip on the shoulder is a sure sign of wood higher up. - Brigham Young

Five exclamation marks, the sure sign of an insane mind. - Terry Pratchett

Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain. - Lily Tomlin

We need a president who's fluent in at least one language. - Buck Henry

Changes in language often reflect the changing values of a culture. - Ravi Zacharias

The four most beautiful words in our common language: I told you so. - Gore Vidal

Silence is the language of God; it is also the language of the heart. - Sivananda

My wife's an earth sign. I'm a water sign. Together we make mud. - Henny Youngman

Toss out the rules; don't think outside the box, throw the box away. - Nido Qubein

Dreams say what they mean, but they don't say it in daytime language. - Gail Godwin

Clean and nourish your mind every day. It can easily become a garbage bin. - Unknown

The sign said "eight items or less." So I changed my name to Les. - Steven Wright

Symptoms are the body's mother tongue; signs are in a foreign language. - John Brown

A sign of celebrity is that his name is often worth more than his services. - Daniel J. Boorstin

Music is the only language in which you cannot say a mean or sarcastic thing. - John Erskine

I got something important here to read and sign and I gotta consecrate on that. - Archie Bunker

No one has a finer command of language than the person who keeps his mouth shut. - Sam Rayburn

Three problems we have: lack of boundaries, insufficient language, incompletions. - Thomas Leonard

The most beautiful words in the English language are "cheque enclosed". - Dorothy Parker

In California, they don't throw their garbage away - they make it into TV shows. - Woody Allen

When a man falls into his anecdotage, it is a sign for him to retire from the world. - Benjamin Disraeli

We really have everything in common with America nowadays except, of course, language. - Oscar Wilde

Great literature is simply language charged with meaning to the utmost possible degree. - Ezra Pound

I'm having difficulty getting the doctors around here to sign the appropriate form. - Spike Milligan

Never make fun of someone who speaks broken English. It means they know another language. - H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

I used to think that one of the great signs of security was the ability to just walk away. - Jack Nicholson

If a cluttered desk is a sign of a cluttered mind, of what, then, is an empty desk a sign? - Albert Einstein

I've been married to a communist and a fascist, and neither would take out the garbage. - Zsa Zsa Gabor

A person's name is, to that person, the sweetest, most important sound in any language. - Dale Carnegie

The first man to use abusive language instead of his fists was the founder of civilization. - Sigmund Freud

Officialese: A government language where you can understand the words, but not the sentences - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

If you are discouraged it is a sign of pride, because it shows you trust in your own powers. - Mother Teresa

If a cluttered desk is the sign of a cluttered mind, what is the significance of a clean desk? - Laurence J. Peter

It is when we notice the dirt that God is most present in us; it is the very sign of His presence. - C S Lewis

A pedestrian ought to be legally allowed to toss at least one hand grenade at a motorist every day. - Brendan Francis

Music is the language of the spirit. It opens the secret of life bringing peace, abolishing strife. - Kahlil Gibran

I got all the schooling any actress needs. That is, I learned to write well enough to sign contracts. - Hermione Gingold

I saw a sign: "Rest Area 25 Miles". That's pretty big. Some people must be really tired. - Steven Wright

I speak to everyone in the same way, whether he is the garbage man or the president of the university. - Albert Einstein

Although he tortures the English language, he has not yet succeeded in forcing it to reveal its meaning. - J B Morton

The names of colors are at the edge, between where language fails and where it's at its most powerful. - A.S. Byatt

If you're not failing every now and again, it's a sign you're not doing anything very innovative. - Woody Allen

Pain is a sign that we are alive. Problems are a sign that we are strong. Prayer is a sign that we are not alone. - Unknown

Language, identity, place, home: these are all of a piece - just different elements of belonging and not-belonging. - Jhumpa Lahiri

Life is one big road with lots of signs. So when you're riding through the ruts, don't complicate your mind. - Bob Marley

If the English language made any sense, 'lackadaisical' would have something to do with a shortage of flowers. - Doug Larson

The longest word in the English language is the one following the phrase, "And now a word from our sponsor." - Hal Eaton

She ran after the garbage truck yelling, "Am I too late for the garbage?"
The driver said, "No, jump in!" - Red Skelton

The greatest sign of success for a teacher is to be able to say, "The children are now working as if I did not exist." - Maria Montessori

One of the signs of passing youth is the birth of a sense of fellowship with other human beings as we take our place among them. - Virginia Woolf

The question arises: whether all lawyers are the same. This is like asking whether everything that gets into a sewer is garbage. - Florynce R Kennedy

I glanced out the window at the signs of spring. The sky was almost blue, the trees were almost budding, the sun was almost bright. - Millard Kaufman

Always try to use the language so as to make quite clear what you mean and make sure your sentence couldn't mean anything else. - C S Lewis

If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his language, that goes to his heart. - Nelson Mandela

A man’s life is interesting primarily when he has failed – I well know. For it’s a sign that he tried to surpass himself. - Georges Clemenceau

"I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence? - George Carlin

Abundance and vigor of automatic movements are desirable, and even a considerable degree of restlessness is a good sign in young children. - G Stanley Hall

Just be good and kind to your children. Not only are they the future of the world, they're the ones who can sign you into the nursing home. - Dennis Miller

I remain convinced that obstinate addiction to ordinary language in our private thoughts is one of the main obstacles to progress in philosophy. - Bertrand Russell

Mathematicians are like Frenchmen: whatever you say to them they translate into their own language and forthwith it is something entirely different. - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe


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