#1 humor site on the 'net

Toepener

Door opener for those with not enough hands

Toepener thanks to Roy Taylor

QuotaBills
Be an opener of doors. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Can Opener: Key to the washroom - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Reaching high keeps a man on his toes. - Unknown

It's opener there in the wide open air. - Dr. Seuss

Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener. - Paula Deen

I got a garage door opener. It can't close. Just open. - Steven Wright

Toe: A part of the foot used to find furniture in the dark - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Acorn: 1. An oak in a nutshell; 2. Something painful on Dad's toe. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who has never owned a car. - Carrie Snow

Guarantee: A legal vehicle which expires on the same day as your mechanical one - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I want someone who can keep me on my toes, has a good sense of humor and a good heart. - Carmen Electra

You have to look for teachers. If you want to be a mechanic, go hang out with mechanics. - Robert Kiyosaki

If quantum mechanics hasn't profoundly shocked you, you haven't understood it yet. - Niels Bohr

The ballet toe shoe is one of the few instruments of torture to survive intact into our time. - Unknown

My mechanic told me, "I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder." - Steven Wright

My tastes are not those of the king, who has none, except for hunting and mechanic's labour. - Marie Antoinette

Law of Mechanical Repair: After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

It is questionable if all the mechanical inventions yet made have lightened the day's toil of any human being. - John S Mill

A designer is an emerging synthesis of artist, inventor, mechanic, objective economist and evolutionary strategist. - R. Buckminster Fuller

The minute there's a map, there is no art. Paint by numbers is not art. Paint by numbers is a mechanical activity. - Seth Godin

Irish poets, learn your trade, sing whatever is well made, scorn the sort now growing up all out of shape from toe to top. - William Butler Yeats

Wit is the key, I think, to anybody's heart. Show me the person who doesn't like to laugh and I'll show you a person with a toe tag. - Julia Roberts


Photo Scratch

Yoda-Churchill

Cup of Mona Lisa

Bar Walker

Olympic Moon Rings

BTTF II Car

Pool Garden

Lunch Break on a Hot Day

Wait For My Human

China Road Load

Burger King Street

Taking The Bait

Redneck Tailgate

Horse Model

What Has America Become?

Billionaire Thoughts

New Style Ribs

Beware Of Sign

Into Fitness - Part I

Puddle Bath

Olympic Hurdle Joe

Katoomba Railway

The Importance Of Education

New Events for Summer Olympics