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Tested Positive

Viral Doctor humour for Canadian Political adherents and TP hoarders

Tested Positive thanks to Barry McCartney

QuotaBills
That virus is a pussycat. - Peter Duesberg

Has Beans: Used coffee grounds - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Time is generally the best doctor. - Ovid

A week is a long time in politics. - Harold Wilson

This virus just breaks all the rules. - Thomas Scott

A morning without coffee is like sleep. - Unknown

How I feel when there is no coffee? DEPRESSO - Unknown

Three out of four doctors recommend another doctor. - Graffito

Nothing is so admirable in politics as a short memory. - John Kenneth Galbraith

A half doctor near is better than a whole one far away. - German Proverb

Endangered forests are being slaughtered for toilet paper. - Daphne Zuniga

Behind every successful woman is a substantial amount of coffee. - Stephanie Piro

A smart mother makes often a better diagnosis than a poor doctor. - August Bier

In order to become the master, the politician poses as the servant. - Charles de Gaulle

What would life be without coffee? But then, what is it even with coffee? - King Louis XV

If you are too smart to pay the doctor, you had better be too smart to get ill. - African Proverb

Oh, when I was a kid, I was ugly. When I was born, the doctor smacked my mother. - Rodney Dangerfield

A good politician, under democracy, is quite as unthinkable as an honest burglar. - H L Mencken

If there's no coffee, I'm not getting up. Make Groundhog Day just better. - ethicalbean

It's amazing how the world begins to change through the eyes of a cup of coffee. - Donna A Favors

Good communication is as stimulating as black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after. - Anne Morrow Lindbergh

In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man; if you want anything done, ask a woman. - Margaret Thatcher

I wondher why ye can always read a doctor's bill an' ye niver can read his purscription. - Finley Peter Dunne

People want change but not too much change. Finding that balance is tricky for every politician. - Eleanor Clift

Get thee glass eyes;
And, like a scurvy politician, seem
To see the things thou dost not. - William Shakespeare

When I was born the Doctor took one look at my face, turned me over and said, "Look, twins!" - Rodney Dangerfield

Politics, for years, or all too long, has been concerned with right or left instead of right or wrong. - Richard Armour

Finish last in your league and they call you idiot. Finish last in medical school and they call you doctor. - Abe Lemons

Politics: Poli, a Latin word meaning "many"; and tics, meaning "bloodsucking creatures." - Robin Williams

If my doctor told me I had only six minutes to live, I wouldn't brood, I'd just type a little faster. - Isaac Asimov

What politicians want to create is irreversible change because when you leave office someone changes it back again. - Estelle Morris

In politics it is necessary either to betray one's country or the electorate. I prefer to betray the electorate. - Charles de Gaulle

One lesson you better learn if you want to be in politics is that you never go out on a golf course and beat the President. - Lyndon B. Johnson

I've got a great doctor. He gave a guy six months to live. They couldn't pay his bill so he gave him another six months. - Henny Youngman

Let no one suppose that the words doctor and patient can disguise from the parties the fact that they are employer and employee. - George Bernard Shaw

I went to the doctor because I'd swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills. My doctor told me to have a few drinks and get some rest. - Rodney Dangerfield

Politicians also have no leisure, because they are always aiming at something beyond political life itself, power and glory, or happiness. - Aristotle

My Doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror. I drink too much. Way too much. My doctor drew blood. He ran a tab. - Rodney Dangerfield

Fang took the entire family out for coffee and donuts the other night. The kids enjoyed it. It was the first time they'd ever given blood. - Phyllis Diller

Our ancestors believed in magic, prayers, trickery, browbeating and bullying. I think it would be fair to sum that up as 'Irish politics'. - Flann O'Brien


Sons Of Arthritis

Husband Colors

Soccer Watch

Finger Lickin' Good!

Scottish Variant

Knight Room

FIFA HQ

Spot The Surfer

Finally Got The Sink Fixed

Antique iPhones

Spongebob Suarez

Auto Correct Passing

Computer Resuscitation

PonyTale

Husband of the Year

Child Disarma-meant

Ancient Greek Stormtrooper

Ferrous Wheel

Dese Are My Bebies

Mega Samurai Sudoku Puzzles

Big Boots To Fill

Redneck Dog Kennel

Mom Posting

Flying is so Overrated