Staple Diet

Diets are mainly food for thought. - N Wylie Jones

The dieting wars have got to stop. - Lady Gaga

I could eat my body weight in sushi. - Mikey Way

Life is uncertain. Eat dessert first. - Ernestine Ulmer

Mine is the least fat diet in the world. - Pierre Dukan

A balanced diet is chocolate in both hands. - Unknown

Smoking cures weight problems... eventually. - Steven Wright

Food is an important part of a balanced diet. - Fran Lebowitz

I'm not gaining weight. I'm living large. - Unknown

Life is too short not to order the bacon dessert. - George Takei

The more you weight the harder you are to kidnap. - Unknown

Eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow you may diet. - Unknown

If stress burned calories, I'd be a supermodel. - Unknown

I've probably tried every fad diet in the world. - Jenna Ushkowitz

A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat. - Erma Bombeck

I don't trust any diet that doesn't allow sugar. - Bethenny Frankel

Nothing burns more calories than dancing in 5-inch heels. - Ariana Grande

Jello: The only food your husband has ever learned to cook - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already. - Tommy Cooper

The cardiologist's diet: - If it tastes good, spit it out. - Unknown

The first couple of days on the detox diet aren't pleasant. - Carol Vorderman

I don't diet, I just don't eat as much as I'd like to. - Linda Evangelista

Whatsoever was the father of a disease, an ill diet was the mother. - George Herbert

Once you lose the weight, you're really anxious to eat healthy. - Etta James

In Heaven, chocolate has no calories and is served as the main course. - Unknown

My metabolism stinks. I can gain weight just listening to dinner music. - Ron Dentinger

A gourmet who thinks of calories is like a tart who looks at her watch. - James Beard

One word frees us of all the weight and pain of life: That word is love. - Sophocles

I've been on a diet for two weeks and all I've lost is two weeks. - Totie Fields

I'm an emotional eater. When I get upset, my diet goes out the window. - Kelly Osbourne

No disease that can be treated by diet should be treated by any other means. - Maimonides

I gotta lose weight, Edith. I hope you remembered my diuretic cottage cheese. - Archie Bunker

A sure way to lose happiness is to want it at the expense of everything else. - Bette Davis

Wouldn't exercise be more fun if calories screamed while you burned them? - Bill Murray

The majority of my diet is made up of the foods that my kid didn't finish. - Carrie Underwood

You can't lose weight by talking about it. You have to keep your mouth shut. - Old Farmer's Almanac

The only time to eat diet food is while you're waiting for the steak to cook. - Julia Child

The best doctors in the world are Doctor Diet, Doctor Quiet, and Doctor Merryman. - Jonathan Swift

Vegetables are a must on a diet. I suggest carrot cake, zucchini bread and pumpkin pie. - Jim Davis

On behalf of every man looking out for every girl, you are the God and weight of her world. - John Mayer

Juicing isn't about binging and cleansing; I try to incorporate it into a balanced diet. - Eddie Huang

I went on a diet, swore off drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I lost two weeks. - Joe E Lewis

The second day of a diet is always easier than the first. By the second day you're off it. - Jackie Gleason

I never worry about diets. The only carrots that interest me are the number you get in a diamond. - Mae West

Grief can be a burden, but also an anchor. You get used to the weight, how it holds you in place. - Sarah Dessen

I'm on a strict liquid diet: Mimosas for breakfast, Margaritas for lunch, Martinis for dinner. - Unknown

There's no point in wasting calories on cheap chocolate, always opt for the darkest and richest. - Nanci Rathbun

A life coach does for the rest of your life what a personal trainer does for your health and fitness. - Elaine MacDonald

My wife is on a diet. Coconuts and bananas. She hasn't lost any weight, but she can sure climb a tree. - Henny Youngman

Nobody can fail to lose weight in the jungle, unless they've got a secret stash of pork pies somewhere. - Colin Baker

I love to go to a movie, get a Diet Coke and a barrel of popcorn, and sit there with my kids and watch a film. - William Shatner

What some call health, if purchased by perpetual anxiety about diet, isn't much better than tedious disease. - Alexander Pope

I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster. - Joe E. Lewis

America is a country where half the money is spent buying food, and the other half is spent trying to lose weight. - Unknown

The first requisite of a good citizen in this republic of ours is that he shall be able and willing to pull his weight. - Theodore Roosevelt

A dark-chocolate truffle melts in my mouth, and I forget about everything else... even the fact that I'm on a diet. - Barbara Brooke

The biggest seller is cookbooks and the second is diet books - how not to eat what you've just learned now to cook. - Andy Rooney

Adversity has the same effect on a man that severe training has on the pugilist: it reduces him to his fighting weight. - Josh Billings

If you maintain a healthy diet, or at least are smart about your food choices, you'll still see the pounds come off. - Misty May-Treanor

Confidence is beautiful, no matter your size, no matter your weight. Be confident in who you are and you'll be beautiful. - Unknown

I like to eat pizza and spaghetti pomodoro, and I'm crazy for dessert. I like all of them: cassata, cheesecake, biscuits. - Stefano Gabbana

In Japan, animation is a big part of your media diet. I moved out to Los Angeles at 9, and when I got homesick, I would watch anime. - Hiro Murai

I'm off the diet, but not the treadmill. I speak as someone who's attempted to lose weight and get fit thrice before in my life. - Ronnie Screwvala

New Pasta Diet: Just walk pasta bakery without stopping. Walk pasta candy store without stopping. Walk pasta ice cream shop without stopping. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I cook croquetas, and I eat jamon. I keep my diet 100% Mediterranean and drink my Rioja. In that sense, I have a piece of Spain in West Hollywood. - Paz Vega