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Redneck Genealogy Lesson
Only a Redneck can become his own Grandpa!
I'm My Own Grandpa - Ray Stephens
Many, many years ago when I was 23
I was married to a widow who was pretty as can be;
This widow had a grown-up daughter who had hair of red
My father fell in love with her and soon they too were wed.
This made my Dad my son-in-law and really changed my life
And now my daughter was my mother ‘cause she was my father’s wife;
And to complicate the matter, even though it brought me joy,
I soon became the father of a bouncing baby boy.
My little baby then became a brother-in-law to Dad
And so became my Uncle, though it made me very sad…
For if he were my Uncle, then that also made him brother
Of the widow’s grown-up daughter, who was of course my step-mother.
Father’s wife then had a son who kept them on the run,
And he became my grandchild for he was my daughter’s son;
My wife is now my mother’s mother, and it makes me blue
Because although she is my wife, she’s my grandmother too.
Now if my wife is my grandmother, then I’m her grandchild
And every time I think of it, nearly drives me wild!
Because now I have become the strangest case you ever saw -
As husband of my grandmother, I am my own grandpa.
I’m my own grandpa,
I’m my own grandpa,
It sounds funny I know
But it really is so, but
I’m my own grandpa.
Many, many years ago when I was 23
I was married to a widow who was pretty as can be;
This widow had a grown-up daughter who had hair of red
My father fell in love with her and soon they too were wed.
This made my Dad my son-in-law and really changed my life
And now my daughter was my mother ‘cause she was my father’s wife;
And to complicate the matter, even though it brought me joy,
I soon became the father of a bouncing baby boy.
My little baby then became a brother-in-law to Dad
And so became my Uncle, though it made me very sad…
For if he were my Uncle, then that also made him brother
Of the widow’s grown-up daughter, who was of course my step-mother.
Father’s wife then had a son who kept them on the run,
And he became my grandchild for he was my daughter’s son;
My wife is now my mother’s mother, and it makes me blue
Because although she is my wife, she’s my grandmother too.
Now if my wife is my grandmother, then I’m her grandchild
And every time I think of it, nearly drives me wild!
Because now I have become the strangest case you ever saw -
As husband of my grandmother, I am my own grandpa.
I’m my own grandpa,
I’m my own grandpa,
It sounds funny I know
But it really is so, but
I’m my own grandpa.
Friends are the family you choose. - Jennifer Aniston
Something bad has befelt the family. - Archie Bunker
My family tree could use some pruning. - Unknown
A happy family is but an earlier heaven. - Sir John Bowring
The family is the nucleus of civilization. - William Durant
The family is one of nature's masterpieces. - George Santayana
I would give everything if I could only keep my family. - Johnny Depp
Family is not an important thing - it's everything. - Michael J. Fox
Dishtemper: What family members suffer from after dinner - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
The presidency is temporary, but the family is permanent. - Yvonne de Gaulle
I come from a family where gravy is considered a beverage. - Erma Bombeck
Acting is just a way of making a living; the family is life. - Denzel Washington
All the men in my family were bearded, and most of the women. - WC Fields
Everyone makes fun of the Redneck until the Zombie Apocalypse. - Unknown
I'm super laid back. I'm from Texas. I love my family. - Selena Gomez
Genealogy: Tracing yourself back to people better than you are. - John G. Pollard
Making the family a top priority will invariably bring success. - Zig Ziglar
People should find happiness in the little things, like family. - Amanda Bynes
Remember as far as anyone knows, we're a nice normal family. - Homer Simpson
Other things may change us, but we start and end with the family. - Anthony Brandt
Work is the least important thing and family is the most important. - Jerry Seinfeld
What can you do to promote world peace? Go home and love your family. - Mother Teresa
Having a family is like having a bowling alley installed in your head. - Martin Mull
Happiness is having a large, caring, close-knit family in another city. - George Burns
Family Tree: The only tree whose branches seek the shelter of its roots - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
For our immediate family and relatives, Canada was a land of opportunity. - Sidney Altman
I come from an Irish Catholic family, and hell-raising is part of the DNA. - Brian Dennehy
If you cannot get rid of the family skeleton, you may as well make it dance. - George Bernard Shaw
As a child, my family's menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it. - Buddy Hackett
You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't. - Jeff Foxworthy
You got to have smelt a lot of mule manure before you can sing like a hillbilly. - Hank Williams
If you're Irish, it doesn't matter where you go - you'll find family. - Victoria Smurfit
I believe in moderation. I work on genealogy only on days that end in 'y'. - Richard Thiesen
Southerners are so devoted to genealogy that we see a family tree under every bush. - Florence King
You don't choose your family. They are God's gift to you, as you are to them. - Desmond Tutu
Your family is depending on you. No better reason to bring all your game all the time. - Grant Cardone
He that has no fools, knaves, nor beggars in his family was begot by a flash of lightning. - Thomas Fuller
There's no road map on how to raise a family: it's always an enormous negotiation. - Meryl Streep
I only hope when I have my own family that every day I see a little more of my father in me. - Keith Urban
I came from a big family. As a matter of fact, I never got to sleep alone until I was married. - Lewis Grizzard
Golden Age: When the kids are too old to need baby-sitters and too young to borrow the family car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
You might be a redneck if your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather. - Jeff Foxworthy
There's a lot of baggage that comes along with our family, but it's Louis Vuitton baggage. - Kim Kardashian
You leave home to seek your fortune and, when you get it, you go home and share it with your family. - Anita Baker
When you start about family, about lineage and ancestry, you are talking about every person on earth. - Alex Haley
Why pay money to have your family tree traced; go into politics and your opponents will do it for you. - Unknown
Family faces are magic mirrors. Looking at people who belong to us, we see the past, present and future. - Gail L. Buckley
The place of the father in the modern suburban family is a very small one, particularly if he plays golf. - Bertrand Russell
Every family story has 1,000 other stories contained within it, like an unending series of nesting dolls. - Alison Pick
I've come to learn that the best time to debate family members is when they have good in their mouths. - Kenneth Cole
The roots of the problems we face in the world, in our national life, and in our family and personal lives are spiritual. - Stephen Covey
Happiness is being content with what you have, living in freedom and liberty, having a good family life and good friends. - Divyanka Tripathi
The family, that dear octopus from whose tentacles we never quite escape, nor in our innermost hearts never quite wish to. - Dodie Smith
The quality of a father can be seen in the goals, dreams and aspirations he sets not only for himself, but for his family. - Reed Markham
The quality of a father can be seen in the goals, dreams, and aspirations he sets not only for himself, but for his family. - Reed Markham
You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze
I pray for forgiveness. For help and guidance. To be a better person. For the health of my family. For the world to be a better place. - Tyson Fury
The average family spends 30 hours in front of a television, and they say they don't have the time to have a balanced, integrated life. - Stephen Covey
The family should be a place where each new human being can have an early atmosphere conducive to the development of constructive creativity. - Edith Schaeffer
I used to live an isolated existence, even in relationships, but now my family knows me for who I really am. Mostly, that's a good thing. - Tim Allen
In a big family the first child is kind of like the first pancake. If it's not perfect, that's okay, there are a lot more coming along. - Antonin Scalia
I like a quiet evening with family or friends over, great food and great discussion, and a lot of laughter. That's really what fills my tank. - Anna Eshoo
I'll paddle board, swim in the ocean, roll in the sand, soak up the sun, eat good food, be with friends and family and go fishing with my dad. - Behati Prinsloo
With the steady disintegration of the family in modern society over the last century, the role of the school in bridging the gap has become vital. - Stephen Covey
Historically the family has played the primary role in educating children for life, with the school providing supplemental scaffolding to the family. - Stephen Covey
Something bad has befelt the family. - Archie Bunker
My family tree could use some pruning. - Unknown
A happy family is but an earlier heaven. - Sir John Bowring
The family is the nucleus of civilization. - William Durant
The family is one of nature's masterpieces. - George Santayana
I would give everything if I could only keep my family. - Johnny Depp
Family is not an important thing - it's everything. - Michael J. Fox
Dishtemper: What family members suffer from after dinner - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
The presidency is temporary, but the family is permanent. - Yvonne de Gaulle
I come from a family where gravy is considered a beverage. - Erma Bombeck
Acting is just a way of making a living; the family is life. - Denzel Washington
All the men in my family were bearded, and most of the women. - WC Fields
Everyone makes fun of the Redneck until the Zombie Apocalypse. - Unknown
I'm super laid back. I'm from Texas. I love my family. - Selena Gomez
Genealogy: Tracing yourself back to people better than you are. - John G. Pollard
Making the family a top priority will invariably bring success. - Zig Ziglar
People should find happiness in the little things, like family. - Amanda Bynes
Remember as far as anyone knows, we're a nice normal family. - Homer Simpson
Other things may change us, but we start and end with the family. - Anthony Brandt
Work is the least important thing and family is the most important. - Jerry Seinfeld
What can you do to promote world peace? Go home and love your family. - Mother Teresa
Having a family is like having a bowling alley installed in your head. - Martin Mull
Happiness is having a large, caring, close-knit family in another city. - George Burns
Family Tree: The only tree whose branches seek the shelter of its roots - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
For our immediate family and relatives, Canada was a land of opportunity. - Sidney Altman
I come from an Irish Catholic family, and hell-raising is part of the DNA. - Brian Dennehy
If you cannot get rid of the family skeleton, you may as well make it dance. - George Bernard Shaw
As a child, my family's menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it. - Buddy Hackett
You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't. - Jeff Foxworthy
You got to have smelt a lot of mule manure before you can sing like a hillbilly. - Hank Williams
If you're Irish, it doesn't matter where you go - you'll find family. - Victoria Smurfit
I believe in moderation. I work on genealogy only on days that end in 'y'. - Richard Thiesen
Southerners are so devoted to genealogy that we see a family tree under every bush. - Florence King
You don't choose your family. They are God's gift to you, as you are to them. - Desmond Tutu
Your family is depending on you. No better reason to bring all your game all the time. - Grant Cardone
He that has no fools, knaves, nor beggars in his family was begot by a flash of lightning. - Thomas Fuller
There's no road map on how to raise a family: it's always an enormous negotiation. - Meryl Streep
I only hope when I have my own family that every day I see a little more of my father in me. - Keith Urban
I came from a big family. As a matter of fact, I never got to sleep alone until I was married. - Lewis Grizzard
Golden Age: When the kids are too old to need baby-sitters and too young to borrow the family car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
You might be a redneck if your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather. - Jeff Foxworthy
There's a lot of baggage that comes along with our family, but it's Louis Vuitton baggage. - Kim Kardashian
You leave home to seek your fortune and, when you get it, you go home and share it with your family. - Anita Baker
When you start about family, about lineage and ancestry, you are talking about every person on earth. - Alex Haley
Why pay money to have your family tree traced; go into politics and your opponents will do it for you. - Unknown
Family faces are magic mirrors. Looking at people who belong to us, we see the past, present and future. - Gail L. Buckley
The place of the father in the modern suburban family is a very small one, particularly if he plays golf. - Bertrand Russell
Every family story has 1,000 other stories contained within it, like an unending series of nesting dolls. - Alison Pick
I've come to learn that the best time to debate family members is when they have good in their mouths. - Kenneth Cole
The roots of the problems we face in the world, in our national life, and in our family and personal lives are spiritual. - Stephen Covey
Happiness is being content with what you have, living in freedom and liberty, having a good family life and good friends. - Divyanka Tripathi
The family, that dear octopus from whose tentacles we never quite escape, nor in our innermost hearts never quite wish to. - Dodie Smith
The quality of a father can be seen in the goals, dreams and aspirations he sets not only for himself, but for his family. - Reed Markham
The quality of a father can be seen in the goals, dreams, and aspirations he sets not only for himself, but for his family. - Reed Markham
You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze
I pray for forgiveness. For help and guidance. To be a better person. For the health of my family. For the world to be a better place. - Tyson Fury
The average family spends 30 hours in front of a television, and they say they don't have the time to have a balanced, integrated life. - Stephen Covey
The family should be a place where each new human being can have an early atmosphere conducive to the development of constructive creativity. - Edith Schaeffer
I used to live an isolated existence, even in relationships, but now my family knows me for who I really am. Mostly, that's a good thing. - Tim Allen
In a big family the first child is kind of like the first pancake. If it's not perfect, that's okay, there are a lot more coming along. - Antonin Scalia
I like a quiet evening with family or friends over, great food and great discussion, and a lot of laughter. That's really what fills my tank. - Anna Eshoo
I'll paddle board, swim in the ocean, roll in the sand, soak up the sun, eat good food, be with friends and family and go fishing with my dad. - Behati Prinsloo
With the steady disintegration of the family in modern society over the last century, the role of the school in bridging the gap has become vital. - Stephen Covey
Historically the family has played the primary role in educating children for life, with the school providing supplemental scaffolding to the family. - Stephen Covey
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