#1 humor site on the 'net

Measure Twice, Cut Once

Not quite on the cutting edge

Measure Twice, Cut Once thanks to Keith Blake

QuotaBills
No Sane man will dance. - Cicero

Surfing is attitude dancing. - Gerry Lopez

My trade and my art is living. - Michel De Montaigne

One does not marry art. One ravishes it. - Edgar Degas

It costs nothing to encourage an artist. - Kevin Smith

An art thief is a man who takes pictures. - George Carlin

Dance is the hidden language of the soul. - Martha Graham

What an artist the world is losing in me. - Nero

Every time I paint a portrait I lose a friend. - John Singer Sargent

Truth is simple, requiring neither study nor art. - Ammian

We can dance on pinheads till the cows come home. - Alastair Campbell

Life imitates Art far more than Art imitates Life. - Oscar Wilde

Love the art in yourself, not yourself in the art. - Constantin Stanislavski

Morality, like art, means drawing a line someplace. - Oscar Wilde

Dance first. Think later. It's the natural order. - Samuel Beckett

The job of the artist is always to deepen the mystery. - Francis Bacon

Art is not what you see, but what you make others see. - Degas

Life is a dance. Mindfulness is witnessing that dance. - Amit Ray

Writing about music is like dancing about architecture. - Elvis Costello

An artist is not paid for his labor but for his vision. - James M Whistler

A work of art which did not begin in emotion is not art. - Paul Cezanne

Works of art make rules; rules do not make works of art. - Claude Debussy

You can often measure a person by the size of his dream. - Robert H. Schuller

Life doesn't imitate art; it imitates bad television. - Woody Allen

The measure of who we are is what we do with what we have. - Unknown

Dancing is like bank robbery - it takes split second timing. - Twyla Tharp

The one thing that can solve most of our problems is dancing. - James Brown

Opportunity dances with those who are already on the dance floor. - Jackson Brown

What sculpture is to a block of marble, education is to the soul. - Joseph Addison

We're fools whether we dance or not, so we might as well dance. - Japanese Proverb

In an artist's life, death is perhaps not the most difficult thing. - Vincent van Gogh

The art of living lies in a fine mingling of letting go and holding on. - Henry H Ellis

Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep. - Scott Adams

Art is so wonderfully irrational, exuberantly pointless, but necessary all the same. - Gunter Grass

To send light into the darkness of men's hearts - such is the duty of the artist. - Robert Schumann

A man begins cutting his wisdom teeth the first time he bites off more than he can chew. - Herb Caen

Shopping: The fine art of acquiring things you don't need with money you don't have. - Unknown

Writing is very much a playground - an artistic playground. It's the most fun thing I do. - Shania Twain

Art is the right hand of nature. The latter has only given us being, the former has made us men. - Friedrich Schiller

I'm proud of my Irish heritage and culture and this show will feature a lot of Irish dancing. - Michael Flatley

Motivation is the art of getting people to do what you want them to do because they want to do it. - Dwight D Eisenhower

You can't dance at two weddings at the same time; nor can you sit on two horses with one behind. - Yiddish Proverb

Never pay attention to what critics say. Remember, a statue has never been set up in honor of a critic. - Jean Sibelius

I recommend that the Statue of Liberty be supplemented by a Statue of Responsibility on the west coast. - Viktor Frankl

The man who can make others laugh secures more votes for a measure than the man who forces them to think. - Malcolm de Chazal

'Healing,' Papa would tell me, 'is not a science, but the intuitive art of wooing nature.' - W H Auden

The most important measure of how good a game I played was how much better I'd made my teammates play. - Bill Russell

It is our art that has an opportunity to leave a footprint in the sand. They don't wrap fish in our work. - Hugh N Jacobsen

What's the earth with all its art, verse, music, worth -
Compared with love, found, gained, and kept? - Robert Browning

To make us feel small in the right way is a function of art; men can only make us feel small in the wrong way. - E M Forster

The crime problem in New York is getting really serious. The other day the Statue of Liberty had both hands up. - Jay Leno

Action is the highest perfection and drawing forth of the utmost power, vigor, and acitivty of man's nature. - Robert South

A designer is an emerging synthesis of artist, inventor, mechanic, objective economist and evolutionary strategist. - R. Buckminster Fuller

Don't measure yourself by what you have accomplished, but by what you should have accomplished with your ability. - John Wooden

Despite all our toil and progress, the art of medicine still falls somewhere between trout casting and spook writing. - Ben Hecht

If being an egomaniac means I believe in what I do and in my art or music, then in that respect you can call me that. - John Lennon

The biggest thing separating people from their artistic ambitions is not a lack of talent. It's the lack of a deadline. - Chris Baty

If art is to nourish the roots of our culture, society must set the artist free to follow his vision wherever it takes him. - John F Kennedy

The art of healing comes from nature, not from the physician. Therefore the physician must start from nature, with an open mind. - Paracelsus

To live is to be musical, starting with the blood dancing in your veins. Everything living has a rhythm. Do you feel your music? - Michael Jackson

The birch-bark canoe of the savage seems to me one of the most beautiful and perfect things of the kind constructed by human art. - William C. Bryant

Deals are my art form. Other people paint beautifully on canvas or write wonderful poetry. I like making deals, preferably big deals. - Donald Trump

Painting is a blind man's profession. He paints not what he sees, but what he feels, what he tells himself about what he has seen. - Pablo Picasso

Art owes its origin to nature. This beautiful creation supplied the first model, while the original teacher was that divine intelligence. - Giorgio Vasari

Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art. It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things that give value to survival. - C S Lewis


Ice Cream Rose

Wedding Pound Cake

Parking Justice

Is This Really Happening?!

The Explanation

High Strung Violinist

Deodorized Pads

Leteracy Night

Redneck Baby Carriage

Stealth Readers

Good Stuff Or Else

Productive Computers

Poodle Power

Trust Issues

Bacon Soda Sales

2021 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

My Time

Lerts

Great White Socks

That's Not A Bagpipe!

Paint Protection

Balanced Writer

Jolly Good Recovery

Tylenol Ban