#1 humor site on the 'net

Ikea Log Home

Bubba can hardly wait to put it all together!

Ikea Log Home thanks to Barry McCartney

QuotaBills
Life is puzzle unsolved. - Santosh Kalwar

Home is a refuge for all good men. - Unknown

Ideal Guest: One who stays at home - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

What is a home without children? Quiet. - Henny Youngman

Heaven is home. Utopia is here. Nirvana is now. - Edward Abbey

We can dance on pinheads till the cows come home. - Alastair Campbell

If light is in your heart, you will find your way home. - Rumi

I can't clean house and save the world at the same time. - Unknown

May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house. - George Carlin

Love ceases to be a puzzle the moment you find the missing piece. - Olaotan Fawehinmi

In my house I'm the boss. My wife is just the decision maker. - Woody Allen

When you make weirdness into a puzzle to be solved, you make LOST. - Joseph Fink

At worst, a house unkept cannot be so distressing as a life unlived. - Rose Macaulay

There's no need for a piece of sculpture in a home that has a cat. - Wesley Bates

Where we love is home - home that our feet may leave, but not our hearts. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

Preserve and cherish the pale blue dot, the only home we've ever known. - Carl Sagan

Tell her I ain't crawlin' home to her with my tail between her legs. - Archie Bunker

I bought a house on a one-way dead-end road. I don't know how I got there. - Steven Wright

Home is a place you grow up wanting to leave, and grow old wanting to get back to. - John E Pearce

A man travels the world over in search of what he needs and returns home to find it. - George Moore

If more of us cared about food and home above gold, this world would be a merrier place. - Bilbo Baggins

Be grateful for the home you have, knowing that at this moment, all you have is all you need. - Sarah B Breathnach

I'm making wine at home, but I'm making it out of raisins so it will be aged automatically. - Steven Wright

You can go other places - you can live on the other side of the world, but you can't ever leave home. - Sue M Kidd

The house smelled musty and damp, and a little sweet, as if it were haunted by the ghosts of long-dead cookies. - Neil Gaiman

Ancient Rome declined because it had a Senate.
What's going to happen to us with both a Senate and a House? - Will Rogers

When I moved out of my mom's house at 18 I was almost as sad to leave her sewing machine behind as anything else. - Beth Ditto

In every jigsaw puzzle, there is one key piece, and the only tough job is to identify that key piece from the mess out there. - Sapan Saxena

My friend Sally is a nudist. I went to her house. The closets have no doors. The walls are covered with see-through wallpaper. - Steven Wright

If there were no schools to take the children away from home part of the time, the insane asylums would be filled with mothers. - Edgar W. Howe

Every woman's dream is that a man will take her in his arms, throw her into bed... and clean the whole house while she sleeps. - Unknown

Talking is a hydrant in the yard and writing is a faucet upstairs in the house. Opening the first takes the pressure off the second. - Robert Frost

If your house is really a mess and a stranger comes to the door, greet him with, "Who could have done this? We have no enemies." - Phyllis Diller

At fifty, the madwoman in the attic breaks loose, stomps down the stairs, and sets fire to the house. She won't be imprisoned anymore. - Erica Jong

Science is built up with facts, as a house is with stones. But a collection of facts is no more a science than a heap of stones is a house. - Jules H Poincare

One of my biggest fears is that I'm going to die alone in my home, and my cats will eat me because I am too dead to open their food cans. - Kelli Jae Baeli

One night I walked home very late and fell asleep in somebody's satellite dish. My dreams were showing up on TV's all over the world. - Steven Wright

Don't lie. Life is a puzzle and we are all unique pieces. When you lie, you make it impossible to find your true place in the grand design. - Steve Maraboli

Mathematics began to seem too much like puzzle solving. Physics is puzzle solving, too, but of puzzles created by nature, not by the mind of man. - Maria G. Mayer

I went to the hardware store and bought some used paint. It was in the shape of a house. I also bought some batteries, but they weren't included. - Steven Wright


Trust Issues

Bacon Soda Sales

2021 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

My Time

Lerts

Great White Socks

That's Not A Bagpipe!

Paint Protection

Balanced Writer

Jolly Good Recovery

Tylenol Ban

In Perfect Harmony

Kiosk Hours

Borderline Stupidity

Inside Outside Thinking

Kia vs Nokia

Waterwheel Rotisserie

Fluent Sarcasm

Stork Exhaust

Music Illusion

New Fuel Gauge

Treescape

Diamond Ring TP

Treadmill Workout