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Husband Quarantine

Knitting project to pass the time away (and make him go away)

Husband Quarantine thanks to Ursula Chambers

QuotaBills
No noose is good noose. - Death Row Prisoner

That virus is a pussycat. - Peter Duesberg

Marriage is the sunset of love. - French Proverb

I married beneath me. All women do. - Lady Nancy Astor

I was so cold I almost got married. - Shelley Winters

Humanity is just a virus with shoes. - Bill Hicks

This virus just breaks all the rules. - Thomas Scott

Language is a virus from outer space. - William S Burroughs

As I get older, I just prefer to knit. - Tracey Ullman

Call no man unhappy until he is married. - Socrates

Cantaloupe: Got to get married in Church - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Give your stress wings and let it fly away. - Gerri Guillemets

Love is blind, but marriage restores its sight. - Georg C. Lichtenberg

A happy marriage is the union of two forgivers. - Ruth Bell Graham

Love - a temporary insanity curable by marriage. - Ambrose Bierce

Make love, not war... or get married and do both. - Unknown

A halo has to fall only a few inches to be a noose. - Dan McKinnon

Getting married is an incredible act of hopefulness. - Ashley Judd

Every time somebody gets the Ebola virus, it mutates. - Glenn Beck

Second Marriage: The triumph of hope over experience. - Samuel Johnson

I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury. - Groucho Marx

In Hollywood, a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk. - Rita Rudner

I want a girl just like the girl that married dear old Dad. - Oedipus Rex

Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows - marriage does. - Groucho Marx

Before you marry keep both eyes open; after marriage shut one. - Jamaican Proverb

I would rather be a beggar and single than a queen and married. - Queen Elizabeth I

We can't predict what a virus we've never seen will do. - Marc Lipsitch

The more you invest in a marriage, the more valuable it becomes. - Amy Grant

Keep thy eyes wide open before marriage, and half shut afterward. - Thomas Fuller

Marriage is but for a little while. It is alimony that is forever. - Quentin Crisp

Reality: The leading cause of stress among those in touch with it. - Lily Tomlin

The general rule is that people who enjoy life also enjoy marriage. - Phyllis Battelle

Too much homework can cause stress, depression and even lower grades. - Unknown

A happy marriage is a long conversation which always seems too short. - Andre Maurois

Marriage is better than leprosy because it's easier to get rid of. - WC Fields

I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always. - Red Skelton

There's one thing about a late marriage - it doesn't last long. - Unknown

Stress is nothing more than a socially acceptable form of mental illness. - Richard Carlson

Stress is an ignorant state. It believes that everything is an emergency. - Natalie Goldberg

Marriage halves our griefs, doubles our joys, and quadruples our expenses. - G K Chesterton

College is a place to keep warm between high school and an early marriage. - George Gobel

I've been married so long I'm on my third bottle of Tabasco sauce. - Susan Vass

Marriage is really tough because you have to deal with feelings and lawyers. - Richard Pryor

The great majority of neuroses in women have their origin in the marriage bed. - Sigmund Freud

Adopting the right attitude can convert a negative stress into a positive one. - Hans Selye

Marriage is very difficult. It's like a 5,000-piece jigsaw puzzle, all sky. - Cathy Ladman

No man is truly married until he understands every word his wife is NOT saying. - Unknown

I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine marriage and a career. - Gloria Steinem

Bachelors: Married men may have better halves, but bachelors have better quarters - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The world has grown suspicious of anything that looks like a happily married life. - Oscar Wilde

Most stress is caused by people who overestimate the importance of their problems. - Michael LeBoeuf

A journey is like marriage. The certain way to be wrong is to think you control it. - John Steinbeck

Marriage is like a bank account. You put it in, you take it out, you lose interest. - Irwin Corey

Stress depletes willpower, which diminishes your ability to control those emotions. - Roy F Baumeister

Marriage is the harmony of God synchronizing two wills with the will of the Father. - Ravi Zacharias

A long marriage is two people trying to dance a duet and two solos at the same time. - Anne Taylor Fleming

I believe in tying the marriage knot, as long as it's around the woman's neck. - WC Fields

A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person. - Mignon McLaughlin

I will continue to freak out my children by knitting in public. It's good for them. - Stephanie Pearl-McPhee

Man should not try to avoid stress any more than he would shun food, love, or exercise. - Hans Selye

Let us now set forth one of the fundamental truths about marriage: the wife is in charge. - Bill Cosby

Marriage is like putting your hand into a bag of snakes in the hope of pulling out an eel. - Leonardo da Vinci

Every time I try to make my marriage more exciting, my wife finds out about it right away. - Bob Monkhouse

I came from a big family. As a matter of fact, I never got to sleep alone until I was married. - Lewis Grizzard

Without the will, marriage is a mockery; without the emotion, it is a drudgery. You need both. - Ravi Zacharias

The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open. - Groucho Marx

Wit is the sudden marriage of ideas which before their union were not perceived to have any relation. - Mark Twain

For marriage to be a success, every woman and every man should have her and his own bathroom. The end. - Catherine Zeta-Jones

Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and just give her a house. - Rod Stewart

Marriage is the only known example of the happy meeting of the immovable object and the irresistible force. - Ogden Nash

Grandchildren don't make a man feel old; it's the knowledge that he's married to a grandmother. - G Norman Collie

The most happy marriage I can picture or imagine to myself would be the union of a deaf man to a blind woman. - Samuel Taylor Coleridge

The Irish Catholic side was married to the life of an actor and I found out acting could be a form of prayer. - Liam Neeson

Marriage is like a cage; one sees the birds outside desperate to get in, and those inside desperate to get out. - Ogden Nash

Love is an ideal thing, marriage is a real thing. A confusion of the real with the ideal never goes unpunished. - Johann Wolfgang Goethe

Properly practiced, knitting soothes the troubled spirit, and it doesn't hurt the untroubled spirit either. - Elizabeth Zimmermann

I married for love. But the obvious side benefit of having someone around to find my glasses cannot be ignored. - Cameron Esposito

I've never been married, but I tell people I'm divorced so they won't think something is wrong with me. - Elayne Boosler

Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits and then complain that he's not the man she married? - Barbara Streisand

Twenty years of romance make a woman look like a ruin, but twenty years of marriage make her something like a public building. - Oscar Wilde

After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together. - Sacha Guitry

Getting married is easy. Staying married is more difficult. Staying happily married for a lifetime should rank among the fine arts. - Roberta Flack

Animals are not our selfie props. If there's any risk that your photo is going to hurt or stress an animal, it's not worth it. - Angela Henderson

Your marriage is in trouble if your wife says, 'You're only interested in one thing,' and you can't remember what it is. - Milton Berle

One advantage of marriage is that when you fall out of love with him or he falls out of love with you, it keeps you together until you fall in again. - Judith Viorst


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