#1 humor site on the 'net

Hobbit Mail

Gandalf on his coffee break

Hobbit Mail thanks to Laryna Marsella

Gandalf is a wizard, member of the Istari order, and leader of the Fellowship of the Ring and the Army of the West in J.R.R. Tolkien's novels The Hobbit, The Lord of the Rings and The Silmarillion.

QuotaBills
Every man under his own fig tree. - Hebrew Saying

A little axe can cut down a big tree. - Jamaican Saying

My family tree could use some pruning. - Unknown

The apple will fall under the apple tree. - Greek Proverb

Time spent amongst trees is never wasted time. - Katrina Mayer

The righteous will flourish like the palm tree. - Psalms 92:12

The trees that are slow to grow bear the best fruit. - Moliere

By trying often, the monkey learns to jump from the tree. - Cameroon Proverb

Preoccupied with a single leaf you won't see the tree. - Vagabond

Life without love is like a tree without blossoms or fruit. - Khalil Gibran

I think that I shall never see
A poem lovely as a tree. - Joyce Kilmer

Native ability without education is like a tree without fruit. - Aristippus

I took a walk in the woods and came out taller than the trees. - Henry David Thoreau

I ordered a bed from IKEA and they sent me a tree trunk and a saw. - Eileen Curtright

Family Tree: The only tree whose branches seek the shelter of its roots - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The trees in Siberia are miles apart - that's why the dogs are so fast. - Bob Hope

The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now. - Chinese Proverb

Death is just a low chemical trick played on everybody except sequoia trees. - J.J. Furnas

Learn not to talk to me. You shake the tree, a leopard's going to fall out. - Kobe Bryant

Each has his own tree of ancestors, but at the top of all sits Probably Arboreal. - Robert Louis Stevenson

If we surrendered to earth's intelligence, we could rise up rooted like trees. - Rainer M Rilke

Suburbia is where the developer bulldozes out the trees, then names the streets after them. - Bill Vaughan

Transplanting the ballet to the United States is like trying to raise a palm tree in Dakota. - Lincoln Kirsten

Even if I knew that tomorrow the world would go to pieces, I would still plant my apple tree. - Martin Luther

If you reveal your secrets to the wind, don't blame the wind for revealing them to the trees. - Kahlil Gibran

The difference between a gun and a tree is a difference of tempo. The tree explodes every spring. - Ezra Pound

It's better to fall from a tree and break your back than to fall in love and break your heart. - African Proverb

Why pay money to have your family tree traced; go into politics and your opponents will do it for you. - Unknown

My wife is on a diet. Coconuts and bananas. She hasn't lost any weight, but she can sure climb a tree. - Henny Youngman

Except during the nine months before he draws his first breath, no man manages his affairs as well as a tree does. - George Bernard Shaw

He that climbs the tall tree has won the right to the fruit; he that leaps the wide gulf should prevail in his suit. - Walter Scott

Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. - Abraham Lincoln

It's in the democratic citizen's nature to be like a leaf that doesn't believe in the tree it's part of. - David Foster Wallace

You can't be suspicious of a tree, or accuse a bird or a squirrel of subversion or challenge the ideology of a violet. - Hal Borland

As the poet said, "Only God can make a tree" - probably because it's so hard to figure out how to get the bark on. - Woody Allen

If you think in terms of a year, plant a seed; if in terms of ten years, plant trees; if in terms of 100 years, teach the people. - Confucius

I think trees should bloom earlier in the spring. They act like they are on a schedule. It’s not like they have anywhere to go. - Jarod Kintz

Wolves directly affect the entire ecosystem, not just moose populations, their main prey, because less moose equals more tree growth. - Rolf Peterson

I felt my lungs inflate with the onrush of scenery - air, mountains, trees, people. I thought, 'This is what it is to be happy.' - Sylvia Plath

Love is like the wild-rose briar, friendship like the holly-tree. The holly is dark when the rose-briar blooms, but which will bloom most constantly? - Emily Bronte


Ukrainian Power Adaptor

Dementia Purse

Hedge Race Car

Quebec Stop Sign

Perkatory

Bike Storage

Playground Child Eliminator

2021 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Sidecar

Glass World - Where Plumbers Buy

Three Wise Women

Wrench Dinosaur

One More Drop

Idling Eric Idle

High Heel Diver

Rising To The Occasion

Annual Meeting of the Ontario Summer Tires Club

I See You

Get Off Your High Horse

Redneck Towing

Revenge of the Stallion

Rat Cut

Spot the Hidden Barred Owl

Smoking Hot Body