#1 humor site on the 'net

Greta on Chopsticks

Environmental activist with a Wong view on saving trees

Greta on Chopsticks thanks to Barry McCartney

Greta invited the Chinese to give up using chopsticks to save trees. The Chinese have called on her and her friends to go back to school, where they will learn that chopsticks are made from bamboo. Bamboo is grass. The Chinese invited Greta and her friends not to wipe their butt with toilet paper, because it's made from trees.

Greta Thunberg is a Swedish environmental activist who has gained international recognition for her view that humanity is facing an existential crisis arising from climate change.

QuotaBills
Glass: Chinese marijuana - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Every man under his own fig tree. - Hebrew Saying

My family tree could use some pruning. - Unknown

Trees often transplanted seldom prosper. - Flemish Proverb

What kind of man gives cigarettes to trees? - Robin Williams

Time spent amongst trees is never wasted time. - Katrina Mayer

Once there was a tree, and she loved a little boy. - Shel Silverstein

I looked up my family tree and found out I was the sap. - Rodney Dangerfield

I just love Chinese food. My favorite dish is number 27. - Clement Attlee

Keep a green tree in your heart and perhaps a singing bird will come. - Chinese Proverb

Zealotry: 1. The enemy of idealism; 2. What a tree salesman likes to do. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Death is just a low chemical trick played on everybody except sequoia trees. - J.J. Furnas

What else is there to live for? Chinese food and women. There is nothing else! - Dudley Moore

Learn not to talk to me. You shake the tree, a leopard's going to fall out. - Kobe Bryant

Someone told me I was immature. Guess who's not allowed in my tree house now? - Unknown

If we surrendered to earth's intelligence, we could rise up rooted like trees. - Rainer M Rilke

Someone's sitting in the shade today because someone planted a tree a long time ago. - Warren Buffett

There has never been a better time in history to be an environmental radiation researcher. - Steven Magee

Suburbia is where the developer bulldozes out the trees, then names the streets after them. - Bill Vaughan

Smart people that like good health spend several hours outdoors daily in the shade of trees. - Steven Magee

I want to have a bunch of kids so I can open a factory and have free labor. Beat that, China! - Jarod Kintz

The stars are like the trees in the forest, alive and breathing. And they're watching me. - Haruki Murakami

If I had six hours to chop down a tree, I'd spend the first four hours sharpening the axe. - Abraham Lincoln

The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants. - Thomas Jefferson

If you reveal your secrets to the wind, don't blame the wind for revealing them to the trees. - Kahlil Gibran

We breathe air, trees make air, homework kills trees, therefore homework is going to kill us all. - Unknown

Knowing trees, I understand the meaning of patience. Knowing grass, I can appreciate persistence. - Hal Borland

I still have my Christmas Tree. I looked at it today. Sure enough, I couldn't see any forests. - Steven Wright

It's better to fall from a tree and break your back than to fall in love and break your heart. - African Proverb

I had a meal last night. I ordered everything in French - surprised everybody, it was a Chinese restaurant. - Tommy Cooper

My big focus is China and OPEC and all of these countries that are just absolutely destroying the United States. - Donald Trump

Just because I have rice on my clothes doesn't mean I've been to a wedding. A Chinese man threw up on me. - Phyllis Diller

He that climbs the tall tree has won the right to the fruit; he that leaps the wide gulf should prevail in his suit. - Walter Scott

When anyone asks me about the Irish character, I say look at the trees. Maimed, stark and misshapen, but ferociously tenacious. - Unknown

I think trees should bloom earlier in the spring. They act like they are on a schedule. It’s not like they have anywhere to go. - Jarod Kintz

Wolves directly affect the entire ecosystem, not just moose populations, their main prey, because less moose equals more tree growth. - Rolf Peterson

Only when the last tree has withered, and the last fish caught, and the last river been poisoned, will we realize we cannot eat money. - Cree Proverb

Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it was stupid. - Albert Einstein

She's so fat she's my two best friends. She wears stretch caftans. She's got more chins than the Chinese telephone directory. - Joan Rivers

I think that I shall never see
A billboard lovely as a tree;
Perhaps, unless the billboards fall,
I'll never see a tree at all. - Ogden Nash


Tonsil Ring

Brew Haul-her - 12 Brewskies At A Time

Anon-y-moose

Redneck Beer Opener

Greek Monk

Dates For Everyone

Max Occupancy Rounded to 100

Group Photo

Awning Truck Advertising

Harley Load

Face To Face

Who Needs Physics?

Benched Puppies

Water Relief

Shot Glasses

Men in Denim

Chocolate Couch

Ant Attack

Extreme Pressure Cooker

Just Thinking

Nothing Wrong Picture

Lipstick Dog

Hair Strengthener

Whale Photobomb