Cow Vacation
Where cows dream of going for mooternity leave
QuotaBillsLaughter is an instant vacation. - Milton Berle
Organic Farm: Tilling like it is - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Never kick a cow chip on a hot day. - Will Rogers
Vice-President: A cow's fifth teat. - Harry S Truman
Milk many cows but make your own butter. - Erwin Lutzer
Milk the cow but do not pull off the udder. - Greek Proverb
Laughing Stock: Cattle with a sense of humour - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
I take my vacation on the combine and tractor. - Jon Tester
I had rather be on my farm than be emperor of the world. - George Washington
Change is like a charging cow. Don't ignore it - milk it. - Andrew Leigh
Stable: A command given to make a male cow remain in one place - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
No man needs a vacation so much as the man who has just had one. - Elbert Hubbard
Mrs. O'Leary's cow is sorry, but Cleveland burned anyway. - Archie Bunker
If Autocorrect was a person I would never go on a vacation with it. - Paula Pell
Middle age is when, wherever you go on holiday, you pack a sweater. - Denis Norden
You should never hesitate to trade your cow for a handful of magic beans. - Tom Robbins
Mankind has a free will; but it is free to milk cows and to build houses, nothing more. - Martin Luther
Valentine's Day - a nice holiday because it's the first day of the rest of your wife. - Milton Berle
I never said all actors are cattle; what I said was all actors should be treated like cattle. - Alfred Hitchcock
I was in a sushi bar and it dawned on me - how could I discriminate between a cow and a fish? - Carre Otis
Seems like Americans just want it to be Halloween all year. The holiday just keeps getting more popular. - Amity Shlaes
If I don't work, I'll be sitting on the couch watching TV, eating popcorn and getting like a cow. - Celia Cruz
I'm a farm boy. If we need five people to haul in hay, we don't take one and just work them to death. - Lincoln Davis
It used to take me all vacation to grow a new hide in place of the one they flogged off me during school term. - Mark Twain
Instead of wondering when your next vacation is, you ought to set up a life you don't need to escape from. - Seth Godin
Love is hard work. It is the hardest work I know of, work from which you are never entitled to take a vacation. - Ravi Zacharias
Airport screeners are now scanning holiday fruitcakes. Not even the scanners can tell what those little red things are. - David Letterman
I could dance with you till the cows come home...
on second thought, I'll dance with the cows till you come home. - Groucho Marx
They invented the three-day bank holiday weekend because you can't lump all the bad weather into just Saturday and Sunday. - Unknown
Hunters will tell you that a moose is a wily and ferocious forest creature. Nonsense. A moose is a cow drawn by a three-year-old. - Bill Bryson
Mancation: A man's vacation. Generally includes lots of beer, a Redneck grill, slabs of meat for cooking and a sack of fireworks. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Canada is like an old cow. The West feeds it. Ontario and Quebec milk it. And you can well imagine what it's doing in the Maritimes. - Tommy Douglas
You're supposed to eat the cows. They're great big lumbering, stupid things - they'd be everywhere if we didn't eat them. - Dylan Moran
The great outdoors is a theme with me; a walking holiday in Scotland is perfect - Culloden and the forests of Aviemore are both favourites. - Erin O'Connor
Free speech is not to be regulated like diseased cattle and impure butter. The audience that hissed yesterday may applaud today, even for the same performance. - William O. Douglas
Like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea... we are far too easily pleased. - C S Lewis
The proper behavior all through the holiday season is to be drunk. This drunkenness culminates on New Year's Eve, when you get so drunk you kiss the person you're married to. - P.J. O'Rourke
It's every man's indispensable duty to do all the service he can to his country; and I see not what difference he puts between himself and his cattle who lives without that thought. - John Locke
Should any political party attempt to abolish social security, unemployment insurance, and eliminate labor laws and farm programs, you would not hear of that party again in our political history. - Dwight D Eisenhower
If ever there was a holiday that deserves to be commercialized, it's Halloween. We haven't taken it away from kids. We've just expanded it so that the kid in adults can enjoy it, too. - Cassandra Peterson