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That virus is a pussycat. - Peter Duesberg

Beer speaks. People mumble. - Tony McGee

I work until beer o'clock. - Stephen King

Laughter is the best medicine. - Joe-kster

One doctor makes work for another. - English Proverb

Language is a virus from outer space. - William S Burroughs

I'm so mean, I make medicine sick. - Muhammad Ali

Find a purpose to serve, not a lifestyle to live. - Criss Jami

Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. - Erma Bombeck

A half doctor near is better than a whole one far away. - German Proverb

People who shop in health food stores never look healthy. - Amy Sedaris

If we become ill, modern medicine can work healing miracles. - Joseph B Wirthlin

Our health is a voyage and every illness is an adventure story. - Margiad Evans

Where there is laughter there is always more health than sickness. - Phyllis Bottome

There is no curing a sick man who believes himself to be in health. - Henri Amiel

The worst thing about medicine is that one kind makes another necessary. - Elbert Hubbard

A woman doctor is only good for women's problems - like your groinocology - Archie Bunker

People don't trust private health insurance companies for all the right reasons. - Bernie Sanders

People pay the doctor for his trouble; for his kindness they still remain in his debt. - Seneca

Most religious people accept medicine as a gift from God and reap the benefits of both realms. - Caroline Fraser

They don't make pizza or beer out of celery. And that is all you need to know about celery. - Bill Murray

Viral marketing is almost like finding love. You have to stop doing it to actually make it happen. - Tim Topham

The only equipment lack in the modern hospital? Somebody to meet you at the entrance with a handshake! - Martin H. Fischer

My doctor gave me six months to live, but when I couldn't pay the bill he gave me six months more. - Walter Matthau

Give a man health and a course to steer, and he'll never stop to trouble about whether he's happy or not. - George Bernard Shaw

My illness is due to my doctor's insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid they force down helpless babies. - WC Fields

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. - George Carlin

The best doctor in the world is a veterinarian. He can't ask his patients what is the matter - he's got to know. - Will Rogers

It is astonishing with how little reading a doctor can practice medicine, but is not astonishing how badly he may do it. - William Osler

My doctor recently told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years older already. - Milton Berle

Only one rule in medical ethics need concern you: that action on your part which best conserves the interest of your patient. - Martin H. Fischer

You end up as you deserve. In old age you must put up with the face, the friends, the health, and the children you have earned. - Fay Weldon

It is reasonable to expect the doctor to recognize that science may not have all the answers to problems of health and healing. - Norman Cousins

Let no one suppose that the words doctor and patient can disguise from the parties the fact that they are employer and employee. - George Bernard Shaw

I went to the doctor because I'd swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills. My doctor told me to have a few drinks and get some rest. - Rodney Dangerfield

I pray for forgiveness. For help and guidance. To be a better person. For the health of my family. For the world to be a better place. - Tyson Fury

Lost wealth may be replaced by industry; lost knowledge by study; lost health by temperance or medicine; but lost time is gone forever. - Samuel Smiles

Every essential oil has a healing purpose. I think it's a great gift because it's something that elevates your mood and your health. - Yolanda Hadid

A man who cannot work without his hypodermic needle is a poor doctor. The amount of narcotic you use is inversely proportional to your skill. - Martin H. Fischer

In other industries, value is defined by the ultimate stakeholder - the one who benefits, or not, from the service. We should do the same in medicine. - Dave deBronkart


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