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Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman - Christopher Walken

That virus is a pussycat. - Peter Duesberg

The first wealth is health. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Beer speaks. People mumble. - Tony McGee

Grief is itself a medicine. - William Cowper

Payday came and with it beer. - Rudyard Kipling

I work until beer o'clock. - Stephen King

Laughter is the best medicine. - Joe-kster

No doctor is better than three. - German Proverb

Germ: A little bug with influence - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Time is generally the best doctor. - Ovid

Humanity is just a virus with shoes. - Bill Hicks

Language is a virus from outer space. - William S Burroughs

Happiness is health and a short memory. - Unknown

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. - Unknown

No medicine cures what happiness cannot. - Gabriel G Marquez

Corona: A person who possesses a vehicle. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Find a purpose to serve, not a lifestyle to live. - Criss Jami

A little chocolate a day keeps the doctor at bay. - Marcia Carrington

The No. 1 cause of bankruptcies is medical bills. - Michael Moore

Let food be thy medicine and medicine be thy food. - Hippocrates

Why is it we never get our bad medicine in small doses? - Edmund H North

No man is a good doctor who has never been sick himself. - Chinese Proverb

People who shop in health food stores never look healthy. - Amy Sedaris

Ireland is a fruitful mother of genius, but a barren nurse. - Unknown

Happiness is nothing more than good health and a bad memory. - Albert Schweitzer

What two ideas are more inseparable than Beer and Britannia? - Sydney Smith

Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Wilhelm II

Medicine sometimes snatches away health, sometimes gives it. - Ovid

Medicine is a science of uncertainty and an art of probability. - William Osler

Fond of lawsuits, little wealth; fond of doctors, little health. - Hebrew Proverb

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint. - Markus Herz

Ambition is the germ from which all growth of nobleness proceeds. - Oscar Wilde

Give me a woman who truly loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Kaiser Willhelm II

My doctor said I look like a million dollars - green and wrinkled. - Red Skelton

The patient is not likely to recover who makes the doctor his heir. - Thomas Fuller

I was under medication when I made the decision not to burn the tapes. - Richard M Nixon

I do believe that laughter is the best medicine - it cures everything. - Radhika Apte

One of the major goals of health insurance reform is to bring down the cost. - Valerie Jarrett

High school is a lot like toilet paper: you only miss it when it's gone. - Unknown

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. - Ben Franklin

To array a man's will against his sickness is the supreme art of medicine. - Henry Ward Beecher

A man's health can be judged by which he takes two at a time - pills or stairs. - Joan Welsh

People don't trust private health insurance companies for all the right reasons. - Bernie Sanders

People pay the doctor for his trouble; for his kindness they still remain in his debt. - Seneca

The single biggest threat to man's continued dominance on the planet is the virus. - Joshua Lederberg

France is a country where the money falls apart but you can't tear the toilet paper. - Billy Wilder

You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx

The practice of medicine is a thinker's job, the practice of surgery a plumber's. - Martin H. Fischer

Older people shouldn't eat health food, they need all the preservatives they can get. - Robert Orben

I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places. - Henny Youngman

Physiology is the stepchild of medicine. That is why Cinderella often turns out the queen. - Martin H. Fischer

We go by the major vote, and if the majority are insane, the sane must go to the hospital. - Horace Mann

A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines. - Frank Lloyd Wright

I've just become a pensioner so I've started saving up for my own hospital trolley. - Tom Baker

Smart people that like good health spend several hours outdoors daily in the shade of trees. - Steven Magee

I wonder why you can always read a Doctor's bill but you can never read his prescription. - Finley Peter Dunne

A man has reached middle age when he is warned to slow down by his doctor instead of the police. - Unknown

I figure if I have my health, can pay the rent and I have my friends, I call it "content." - Lauren Bacall

When I was born the Doctor took one look at my face, turned me over and said, "Look, twins!" - Rodney Dangerfield

The only equipment lack in the modern hospital? Somebody to meet you at the entrance with a handshake! - Martin H. Fischer

Finish last in your league and they call you idiot. Finish last in medical school and they call you doctor. - Abe Lemons

The doctor sees all the weakness of mankind, the lawyer all the wickedness, the theologian all the stupidity. - Arthur Schopenhauer

Most ballet teachers in the United States are terrible. If they were in medicine, everyone would be poisoned. - George Balanchine

In the sick room, ten cents' worth of human understanding equals ten dollars' worth of medical science. - Martin H. Fischer

Recommending gastric bypass as a national solution for our diabetes epidemic is bad medicine and bad economics. - Mark Hyman

The New England Journal of Medicine reports that 9 out of 10 doctors agree that 1 out of 10 doctors is an idiot. - Jay Leno

When wealth is lost, nothing is lost. When health is lost, something is lost. When character is lost, all is lost. - Rev. Billy Graham

My illness is due to my doctor's insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid they force down helpless babies. - WC Fields

Following his doctor's orders, Nikita (Khrushchev) has cut his drinking in half. He's leaving out the water. - Bob Hope

Perfect freedom is as necessary to the health and vigor of commerce as it is to the health and vigor of citizenship. - Patrick Henry

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. - George Carlin

The trained nurse has become one of the great blessings of humanity, taking a place beside the physician and the priest. - William Osler

The best doctor in the world is a veterinarian. He can't ask his patients what is the matter - he's got to know. - Will Rogers

It is astonishing with how little reading a doctor can practice medicine, but is not astonishing how badly he may do it. - William Osler

You can catch health, happiness, and success from others just as easily as you can catch worries, bitterness, and failure. - Dale Carnegie

'Psychotherapy' is a private, confidential conversation that has nothing to do with illness, medicine, or healing. - Thomas Szasz

Health is the state about which medicine has nothing to say; sanctity is the state about which theology has nothing to say. - W H Auden

You end up as you deserve. In old age you must put up with the face, the friends, the health, and the children you have earned. - Fay Weldon

I went to the doctor because I'd swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills. My doctor told me to have a few drinks and get some rest. - Rodney Dangerfield

The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd druther not. - Mark Twain

I pray for forgiveness. For help and guidance. To be a better person. For the health of my family. For the world to be a better place. - Tyson Fury

When I was born the doctor came out to the waiting room and told my father, "We did everything we could... but he pulled through." - Rodney Dangerfield

A man who cannot work without his hypodermic needle is a poor doctor. The amount of narcotic you use is inversely proportional to your skill. - Martin H. Fischer

Health is the finest possession. Contentment is the ultimate wealth. Trustworthy people are the best relatives. Unbinding is the supreme ease. - Buddha


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