Corona Bug

Laughter is the best medicine. - Joe-kster

Language is a virus from outer space. - William S Burroughs

I'm so mean, I make medicine sick. - Muhammad Ali

The best medicine is having a good wife. - Kin Hubbard

Surgery is the cry of defeat in medicine. - Martin H. Fischer

The best doctor gives the least medicines. - Benjamin Franklin

The way a doctor writes out a subscription. - Archie Bunker

Beer. Now there's a temporary solution. - Homer Simpson

Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world. - Jack Nicholson

My doctor tells me I got a communications disease. - Archie Bunker

Democracy breeds the germs of its own destruction. - V I Lenin

Every time somebody gets the Ebola virus, it mutates. - Glenn Beck

After two days in hospital I took a turn for the nurse. - WC Fields

We can't predict what a virus we've never seen will do. - Marc Lipsitch

Ambition is the germ from which all growth of nobleness proceeds. - Oscar Wilde

Sleep, riches, and health to be truly enjoyed must be interrupted. - Johann Paul Friedrich Richter

There is no curing a sick man who believes himself to be in health. - Henri Amiel

The patient is not likely to recover who makes the doctor his heir. - Thomas Fuller

Confucius say: "Man who want pretty nurse, must be patient." - Unknown

The worst thing about medicine is that one kind makes another necessary. - Elbert Hubbard

In nothing do men more nearly approach the gods than in giving health to men. - Cicero

To array a man's will against his sickness is the supreme art of medicine. - Henry Ward Beecher

If you are too smart to pay the doctor, you had better be too smart to get ill. - African Proverb

Health care's not about insurance! Health care's about getting treatment. - P.J. O'Rourke

A man's health can be judged by which he takes two at a time - pills or stairs. - Joan Welsh

The art of medicine consists in amusing the patient while nature cures the disease. - Voltaire

I recently became a Christian Scientist. It was the only health plan I could afford. - Betsy Salkind

Show me a Jewish boy who doesn't go to medical school and I'll show you a lawyer. - Milton Berle

I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places. - Henny Youngman

We go by the major vote, and if the majority are insane, the sane must go to the hospital. - Horace Mann

A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines. - Frank Lloyd Wright

They don't make pizza or beer out of celery. And that is all you need to know about celery. - Bill Murray

I wondher why ye can always read a doctor's bill an' ye niver can read his purscription. - Finley Peter Dunne

My doctor gave me six months to live, but when I couldn't pay the bill he gave me six months more. - Walter Matthau

When wealth is lost, nothing is lost. When health is lost, something is lost. When character is lost, all is lost. - Rev. Billy Graham

Following his doctor's orders, Nikita (Khrushchev) has cut his drinking in half. He's leaving out the water. - Bob Hope

Medicine is the restoration of discordant elements; sickness is the discord of the elements infused into the living body. - Leonardo da Vinci

Understand the key factors in the math behind viral marketing, and use those to figure out what it takes to get viral growth. - David Skok

Not all chemicals are bad. Without hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. - Dave Barry

I worked in a health food store once. A guy came in and asked me, "If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?" - Steven Wright