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The first wealth is health. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Medicine is the best medicine. - Doctors Anonymous

Surgery is the cry of defeat in medicine. - Martin H. Fischer

Germs: The only things kids will share freely - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Democracy breeds the germs of its own destruction. - V I Lenin

Why is it we never get our bad medicine in small doses? - Edmund H North

Ah, beer, my one weakness. My Achilles heel, if you will. - Homer Simpson

People who shop in health food stores never look healthy. - Amy Sedaris

A doctor whose breath smells has no right to medical opinion. - Martin H. Fischer

A meal of bread, cheese, and beer constitutes the perfect food. - Queen Elizabeth I

Medicine is a science of uncertainty and an art of probability. - William Osler

Ambition is the germ from which all growth of nobleness proceeds. - Oscar Wilde

Where there is laughter there is always more health than sickness. - Phyllis Bottome

My doctor gave me two weeks to live. I hope they're in August. - Ronnie Shakes

Confucius say: "Man who want pretty nurse, must be patient." - Unknown

Being in a good frame of mind helps one keep in the picture of health. - Unknown

Nobody likes insurance companies, especially health insurance companies. - P.J. O'Rourke

My doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror. - Rodney Dangerfield

The good-news stories in medicine are early detection, early intervention. - Thomas R Insel

High school is a lot like toilet paper: you only miss it when it's gone. - Unknown

But we have to pass the [health care] bill so that you can find out what's in it. - Nancy Pelosi

If you want to get out of medicine the fullest enjoyment, be students all your lives. - David Riesman

You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx

The practice of medicine is a thinker's job, the practice of surgery a plumber's. - Martin H. Fischer

Older people shouldn't eat health food, they need all the preservatives they can get. - Robert Orben

I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course. - Groucho Marx

We go by the major vote, and if the majority are insane, the sane must go to the hospital. - Horace Mann

If you think health care is expensive now, wait until you see what it costs when it's free. - P.J. O'Rourke

An Irishman after trying American beer for the first time: "Put it back in the horse!" - Unknown

Finish last in your league and they call you idiot. Finish last in medical school and they call you doctor. - Abe Lemons

In the sick room, ten cents' worth of human understanding equals ten dollars' worth of medical science. - Martin H. Fischer

Moderation. Small helpings. Sample a little bit of everything. These are the secrets of happiness and good health. - Julia Child

There is no medicine like hope, no incentive so great, and no tonic so powerful as expectation of something tomorrow. - Orison Swett Marden

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. - George Carlin

Despite all our toil and progress, the art of medicine still falls somewhere between trout casting and spook writing. - Ben Hecht

The trained nurse has become one of the great blessings of humanity, taking a place beside the physician and the priest. - William Osler

You can catch health, happiness, and success from others just as easily as you can catch worries, bitterness, and failure. - Dale Carnegie

You end up as you deserve. In old age you must put up with the face, the friends, the health, and the children you have earned. - Fay Weldon

The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd druther not. - Mark Twain

Health is the finest possession. Contentment is the ultimate wealth. Trustworthy people are the best relatives. Unbinding is the supreme ease. - Buddha


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