Cord Chewing
joe-ks.com ... grounded in pun-e, current humour
Watts You See is Watts You Get
QuotaBillsTV: Chewing gum for the eyes. - Frank Lloyd Wright
Coincidences are spiritual puns. - G K Chesterton
Puns are a form of humor with words. - Guillermo C. Infante
Safety doesn't happen by accident. - Unknown
Puns are the highest form of literature. - Alfred Hitchcock
Never slap a man who's chewing tobacco. - Will Rogers
Defendit numerus: There is safety in numbers. - Unknown
In skating over thin ice our safety is in our speed. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
America is so advanced that even the chairs are electric. - Doug Hamwell
Safety Belt: The one you don't drink before driving home - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
The Internet is a telephone system that's gotten uppity. - Clifford Stoll
Heifer cow is better than none, but this is no time for puns. - Groucho Marx
Some days it's just not worth chewing through the restraints. - Unknown
The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it. - Dudley Moore
Education is not the filling of a pail, but the lighting of a fire. - William Butler Yeats
The mind moves in the direction of our currently dominant thoughts. - Earl Nightingale
My father was grounded, a very meat-and-potatoes man. He was a baker. - Anthony Hopkins
The traveler with empty pockets pursues his journey in perfect safety. - Ovid
The 3 fastest means of communication: Twitter; Telephone; Tell a woman. - Unknown
Love is an electric blanket with somebody else in control of the switch. - Cathy Carlyle
We're all just ghosts on a wire seeking the prick of an electric thought. - Robert Fanney
Actually, I comb my hair quite often. Of course, I use an electric toothbrush. - Phyllis Diller
Warm Water Theorem: When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Of puns it has been said that they who most dislike them are least able to utter them. - Edgar Allan Poe
Cashews: The nuts you should hold out for if you're currently working for peanuts. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
The first time I tried organic wheat bread, I thought I was chewing on roofing material. - Robin Williams
My uncle's dying wish was to have me sitting in his lap; he was in the electric chair. - Rodney Dangerfield
In any given moment we have two options: to step forward into growth or step back into safety. - Abraham Maslow
He was of the faith chiefly in the sense that the church he currently did not attend was Catholic. - Kingsley Amis
Bob War: (Southern) A sharp, twisted cable. Usage: 'Boy, stay away from that bob war fence.' - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Promoting self under the guise of promoting Christ is currently so common as to excite little notice. - A.W. Tozer
Individuality is either the mark of genius or the reverse. Mediocrity finds safety in standardization. - Frederick Crane
You get the best effort from others not by lighting a fire beneath them, but by building a fire within. - Bob Nelson
I was training to be an electrician. I suppose I got wired the wrong way round somewhere along the line. - Elvis Presley
How can I believe in God when just last week I got my tongue caught in the roller of an electric typewriter? - Woody Allen
Those who would give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety. - Benjamin Franklin
If this humor be the safety of our race, then it is due largely to the infusion into the American people of the Irish brain. - William Howard Taft
Middle age is when you're sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone rings and you hope it isn't for you. - Ogden Nash
The perfect date for me would be staying at home, making a big picnic in bed, eating Wotsits and cookies while watching cable TV. - Kim Kardashian
This 'telephone' has too many shortcomings to be seriously considered as a means of communication. The device is inherently of no value to us. - Unknown