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Black Plague II

I hear they're bringing it back...

Black Plague II thanks to Bruno Motley

Maybe The Donald was right after all...

QuotaBills
Flew: Plane sickness. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

That virus is a pussycat. - Peter Duesberg

The first wealth is health. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Laughter is the best medicine. - Joe-kster

Maternity Hospital: An heirport - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Logic is the anatomy of thought. - Albert Einstein

A young doctor means a new graveyard. - German Proverb

Language is a virus from outer space. - William S Burroughs

A young doctor makes a humpy graveyard. - English Proverb

God heals, and the doctor takes the fees. - Benjamin Franklin

Happiness is good health and a bad memory. - Ingrid Bergman

God is a concept by which we measure our pain. - John Lennon

Panic plays no part in the training of a nurse. - Elizabeth Kenny

Humor is the instinct for taking pain playfully. - Max Eastman

Leaders don't inflict pain; they share pain. - Max Depree

A little chocolate a day keeps the doctor at bay. - Marcia Carrington

The No. 1 cause of bankruptcies is medical bills. - Michael Moore

My doctor tells me I got a communications disease. - Archie Bunker

Before we make love my husband takes a pain killer. - Joan Rivers

The wish for healing has always been half of health. - Lucius Annaeus Seneca

Hope is medicine for a soul that's sick and tired. - Eric Swensson

Champions expect pain, endure pain, and never complain. - Unknown

A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running. - Groucho Marx

After two days in hospital I took a turn for the nurse. - WC Fields

Through pain I've learned to comfort suffering men. - Virgil

Why is it we never get our bad medicine in small doses? - Edmund H North

The two enemies of human happiness are pain and boredom. - Arthur Schopenhauer

Laughter is the tonic, the relief, the surcease for pain. - Charlie Chaplin

Happiness is nothing more than good health and a bad memory. - Albert Schweitzer

If we become ill, modern medicine can work healing miracles. - Joseph B Wirthlin

If you ignore your health for long enough, it'll go away. - Unknown

Medicine sometimes snatches away health, sometimes gives it. - Ovid

A nurse will always give us hope, an angel with a stethoscope. - Terri Guillemets

One good thing about music, when it hits you, you feel no pain. - Bob Marley

Champagne for my real friends and real pain for my sham friends. - Tom Waits

My doctor gave me two weeks to live. I hope they're in August. - Ronnie Shakes

Save one life, you're a hero. Save 100 lives, you're a nurse. - Unknown

The best way to reduce the cost of medical care is to reduce the illness. - Arlen Specter

Shared pain is lessened; shared joy, increased - thus do we refute entropy. - Spider Robinson

I liked being a teenager, but I would not go back for all the tea in China. - Rob Lowe

Faith and knowledge lean largely upon each other in the practice of medicine. - Peter Mere Latham

Find a place inside where there's joy, and the joy will burn out the pain. - Joseph Campbell

No pain, no palm; no thorns, no throne; no gall, no glory; no cross, no crown. - William Penn

Health is like money - we never have a true idea of its value until we lose it. - Josh Billings

A hospital should also have a recovery room adjoining the cashier's office. - Francis O'Walsh

You care so much you feel as though you will bleed to death with the pain of it. - J K Rowling

My mother-in-law had a pain beneath her left breast. Turned out to be a trick knee. - Phyllis Diller

I recently became a Christian Scientist. It was the only health plan I could afford. - Betsy Salkind

Poisons and medicine are oftentimes the same substance given with different intents. - Peter Mere Latham

First the Doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me. - Steve Martin

Virus is a Latin word used by doctors to mean 'your guess is as good as mine'. - Bob Hope

The practice of medicine is a thinker's job, the practice of surgery a plumber's. - Martin H. Fischer

Having insurance doesn't guarantee good health outcomes, but it is a critical factor. - Irwin Redlener

I wonder why you can always read a Doctor's bill but you can never read his prescription. - Finley Peter Dunne

We don't come to Canada for our health. We can think of other ways of enjoying ourselves. - Prince Philip

My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people. - Orson Welles

Mental health problems do not affect three or four out of every five persons but one out of one. - William Menninger

You might be a nurse if you firmly believe that "too stupid to live" should be a diagnosis. - Unknown

When I was born the Doctor took one look at my face, turned me over and said, "Look, twins!" - Rodney Dangerfield

The only equipment lack in the modern hospital? Somebody to meet you at the entrance with a handshake! - Martin H. Fischer

My doctor gave me six months to live, but when I couldn't pay the bill he gave me six months more. - Walter Matthau

To argue with a person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead. - Thomas Paine

They have gun control in Cuba. They have universal health care in Cuba. So why do they want to come here? - Paul Harvey

If my doctor told me I had only six minutes to live, I wouldn't brood, I'd just type a little faster. - Isaac Asimov

The doctor sees all the weakness of mankind, the lawyer all the wickedness, the theologian all the stupidity. - Arthur Schopenhauer

Most ballet teachers in the United States are terrible. If they were in medicine, everyone would be poisoned. - George Balanchine

My big focus is China and OPEC and all of these countries that are just absolutely destroying the United States. - Donald Trump

The more pain that's referenced or implied, the deeper the laugh can be because the laughter heals the pain. - Mimi Kennedy

Give a man health and a course to steer, and he'll never stop to trouble about whether he's happy or not. - George Bernard Shaw

Moderation. Small helpings. Sample a little bit of everything. These are the secrets of happiness and good health. - Julia Child

Just like a shoe, if someone is meant for you, they will fit just perfectly. No forcing, no struggling, and no pain. - Unknown

Sea spaghetti looks like dark fettuccine and has a similar texture - you can get it in health food stores or online. - Yotam Ottolenghi

It is astonishing with how little reading a doctor can practice medicine, but is not astonishing how badly he may do it. - William Osler

The public blabbers about preventive medicine, but will neither appreciate nor pay for it. You get paid for what you cure. - Martin H. Fischer

Health is the state about which medicine has nothing to say; sanctity is the state about which theology has nothing to say. - W H Auden

A doctor who cannot take a good history and a patient who cannot give one are in danger of giving and receiving bad treatment. - Unknown

Only one rule in medical ethics need concern you: that action on your part which best conserves the interest of your patient. - Martin H. Fischer

It's a funny relationship that makeup artists have. I always feel kind of like a dentist. People look at me and think of pain. - Rick Baker

I went to the doctor because I'd swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills. My doctor told me to have a few drinks and get some rest. - Rodney Dangerfield

I worked in a health food store once. A guy came in and asked me, "If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?" - Steven Wright

Where we always start is: What's the user's itch? What's their pain point that occurs frequently enough to build a habit around? - Nir Eyal

Health is the finest possession. Contentment is the ultimate wealth. Trustworthy people are the best relatives. Unbinding is the supreme ease. - Buddha

There are two ways you can get through pain. You can let it destroy you, or you can use it as fuel to drive you: to dream bigger, to work harder. - Taylor Swift

Nurse: 1. A woman whose business is to make sickness a pleasure; 2. A young women who holds your wrist and then expects your pulse to be normal. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Mysterious love, uncertain treasure, hast thou more of pain or pleasure! Endless torments dwell about thee: Yet who would live, and live without thee! - Joseph Addison


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