#1 humor site on the 'net

1947 X-ray Machine

X-ray Overdose - Radiation Sickness: How safe are X-rays?

1947 X-ray Machine thanks to Barry McCartney

QuotaBills
Anatomy is destiny. - Sigmund Freud

Grief is itself a medicine. - William Cowper

Logic is the anatomy of thought. - Albert Einstein

A young doctor means a new graveyard. - German Proverb

I'm so mean, I make medicine sick. - Muhammad Ali

A young doctor makes a humpy graveyard. - English Proverb

Happiness is health and a short memory. - Unknown

Where a man feels pain he lays his hand. - Dutch Proverb

No medicine cures what happiness cannot. - Gabriel G Marquez

Surgery is the cry of defeat in medicine. - Martin H. Fischer

The No. 1 cause of bankruptcies is medical bills. - Michael Moore

Three out of four doctors recommend another doctor. - Graffito

Hope is medicine for a soul that's sick and tired. - Eric Swensson

Laughter is the tonic, the relief, the surcease for pain. - Charlie Chaplin

People who shop in health food stores never look healthy. - Amy Sedaris

Ireland is a fruitful mother of genius, but a barren nurse. - Unknown

If you ignore your health for long enough, it'll go away. - Unknown

Pleasure of love lasts but a moment. Pain of love lasts a lifetime. - Bette Davis

I was under medication when I made the decision not to burn the tapes. - Richard M Nixon

Joy is more divine than sorrow, for joy is bread and sorrow is medicine. - Henry Ward Beecher

The great art of life is sensation; to feel that we exist, even in pain. - Lord Byron

My doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror. - Rodney Dangerfield

The good-news stories in medicine are early detection, early intervention. - Thomas R Insel

Faith and knowledge lean largely upon each other in the practice of medicine. - Peter Mere Latham

Oh, when I was a kid, I was ugly. When I was born, the doctor smacked my mother. - Rodney Dangerfield

Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing. - Redd Foxx

A man's health can be judged by which he takes two at a time - pills or stairs. - Joan Welsh

The practice of medicine is a thinker's job, the practice of surgery a plumber's. - Martin H. Fischer

Cheerfulness is the best promoter of health and is as friendly to the mind as to the body. - Joseph Addison

If you're not paying for it through the health plan, you pay for it in the emergency room. - David Lehman

A man has reached middle age when he is warned to slow down by his doctor instead of the police. - Unknown

My doctor gave me six months to live, but when I couldn't pay the bill he gave me six months more. - Walter Matthau

Finish last in your league and they call you idiot. Finish last in medical school and they call you doctor. - Abe Lemons

Most ballet teachers in the United States are terrible. If they were in medicine, everyone would be poisoned. - George Balanchine

Recommending gastric bypass as a national solution for our diabetes epidemic is bad medicine and bad economics. - Mark Hyman

I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster. - Joe E. Lewis

The best doctor in the world is a veterinarian. He can't ask his patients what is the matter - he's got to know. - Will Rogers

A doctor who cannot take a good history and a patient who cannot give one are in danger of giving and receiving bad treatment. - Unknown

A man who cannot work without his hypodermic needle is a poor doctor. The amount of narcotic you use is inversely proportional to your skill. - Martin H. Fischer

My Doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror. I drink too much. Way too much. My doctor drew blood. He ran a tab. - Rodney Dangerfield


Morning Saving Time

Kangaroo On Ice

Life's Choices

Olympic Torch Bearers

Lethal Weapon

Cell Shaver

Getting Goosed

No Swimming

Drift Racing

Alligators vs. Crocodiles

Cure for Internet Addiction

Seal LOL

Keyboard Seating

Illusive Dice

Cockroach Cancer

Time Management

People Crossing

Cozy Home

Redneck Faucet

Duck That Did Not Duck

Chewie, We're Home

Introducing the iPhone 20

Meateor

Ancient Shiloh