#1 humor site on the 'net

Tiny Little Bladder

What inspires you to get out of bed?

Tiny Little Bladder thanks to Chris Kane

QuotaBills
Old age comes at a bad time. - Sue Banducci

Old age is no place for sissies. - Bette Davis

Cherish youth, but trust old age. - Pueblo Proverb

Aspire to inspire before we expire. - Unknown

I want to die young at a ripe old age. - Ashley Montagu

Old age is always 15 years older than I am. - Bernard Baruch

Old age is like underwear, it creeps up on you. - Unknown

The gods bestowed on him the gift of perpetual old age. - Oscar Wilde

No one was ever great without some portion of divine inspiration. - Cicero

I'm aging like fine wine. I'm getting complex and fruity. - Unknown

Never have I enjoyed youth so thoroughly as I have in my old age. - George Santayana

Amateurs wait for inspiration. The real pros get up and go to work. - Harvey Mackay

The tragedy of old age is not that one is old, but that one is young. - Oscar Wilde

I suppose real old age begins when one looks backward rather than forward. - May Sarton

We look forward to a disorderly, vigorous, unhonored and disreputable old age. - Don Marquis

How incessant and great are the ills with which a prolonged old age is replete. - C S Lewis

Enthusiasm is excitement with inspiration, motivation, and a pinch of creativity. - Bo Bennett

Inspiration responds to our attentiveness in various and sometimes unexpected ways. - Wayne W Dyer

Poisons and medicine are oftentimes the same substance given with different intents. - Peter Mere Latham

Grave: A place in which the dead are laid to await the coming of the medical student - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The only medicine for suffering, crime, and all the other woes of mankind, is wisdom. - Thomas Huxley

More people would live to a ripe old age if they weren't too busy providing for it. - Unknown

Do we not all agree to call rapid thought and noble impulse by the name of inspiration? - George Eliot

Show me a Jewish boy who doesn't go to medical school and I'll show you a lawyer. - Milton Berle

We could certainly slow the aging process down if it had to work its way through Congress. - Will Rogers

The art of medicine consists of amusing the patient, whilst Mother Nature takes care of the cure. - Voltaire

When grace is joined with wrinkles, it is adorable. There is an unspeakable dawn in happy old age. - Victor Hugo

Success is the good fortune that comes from aspiration, desperation, perspiration and inspiration. - Evan Esar

If the universe is bigger and stranger than I can imagine, it's best to meet it with an empty bladder. - John Scalzi

I have drawn inspiration from the Marine Corps, the Jewish struggle in Palestine and Israel, and the Irish. - Leon Uris

Old age is when you resent the swimsuit issue of Sports Illustrated because there are fewer articles to read. - George Burns

In the sick room, ten cents' worth of human understanding equals ten dollars' worth of medical science. - Martin H. Fischer

The New England Journal of Medicine reports that 9 out of 10 doctors agree that 1 out of 10 doctors is an idiot. - Jay Leno

Only one rule in medical ethics need concern you: that action on your part which best conserves the interest of your patient. - Martin H. Fischer

When nature is my inspiration and subject, I am witness to an extraordinary range of color and every imaginable atmospheric condition. - Karen Casey

Lost wealth may be replaced by industry; lost knowledge by study; lost health by temperance or medicine; but lost time is gone forever. - Samuel Smiles

Aging: 1. A supposed ripening into wisdom that most Westerners attempt to delay as long as possible; 2. A one-way street with no stoplights. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Old age has a great sense of calm and freedom. When the passions have relaxed their hold you have escaped, not from one master, but from many. - Plato

One of the first duties of the physician is to educate the masses not to take medicine... Soap and water and common sense are the best disinfectants. - William Osler

In other industries, value is defined by the ultimate stakeholder - the one who benefits, or not, from the service. We should do the same in medicine. - Dave deBronkart


Bomb Squad Prank

Redneck Waterslide

Wailea Beach

Apple Art

Origin of the Whoopee Cushion

Better Lawyer

Laundry Goat

Meat Loaf

Better With A Beard

Fat Twin Sisters

Breathe in the Ocean

Tel Aviv Luxury Penthouse

Caffeine Boosters

Head Path

Proper English

Reese Witherspoon

Phones At Six

It Was A Dark And Stormy Night

Mega Samurai Sudoku Puzzles

Whiskey Lurks Good

Tetris Couch

Canadian Alphabet

Love Rocks

Benadryl Cumquat