#1 humor site on the 'net

Tent Pole Dancing

Finding ways to disappoint your father

Tent Pole Dancing thanks to Keith Blake

QuotaBills
An old man in a house is a good sign. - Benjamin Franklin

A riot is the language of the unheard. - Martin Luther King, Jr.

The eyes have one language everywhere. - George Herbert

Either dance well or quit the ballroom. - Greek Proverb

All dancing girls are nineteen years old. - Japanese Proverb

To watch us dance is to hear our hearts speak. - Indian Proverb

A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing. - Clive James

You can dance anywhere, even if only in your heart. - Unknown

Life is a foreign language; all men mispronounce it. - Christopher Morley

Wives are people who feel they don't dance enough. - Groucho Marx

I would believe only in a God that knows how to dance. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

Language exerts hidden power, like a moon on the tides. - Rita Mae Brown

A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory. - Steven Wright

The art of communication is the language of leadership. - James Humes

Talking about music is like dancing about architecture. - Steve Martin

Nothing burns more calories than dancing in 5-inch heels. - Ariana Grande

How do they get the deer to cross at that yellow road sign? - George Carlin

Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain. - Lily Tomlin

If you wouldn't write it and sign it, don't say it. - Earl Wilson

Dancing is like bank robbery - it takes split second timing. - Twyla Tharp

The one thing that can solve most of our problems is dancing. - James Brown

We need a president who's fluent in at least one language. - Buck Henry

There is no language like the Irish for soothing and quieting. - John Millington Synge

Reality can be lost when reason and language have been violated. - Ravi Zacharias

We're fools whether we dance or not, so we might as well dance. - Japanese Proverb

If you're already walking on thin ice, you might as well dance. - Proverb

Changes in language often reflect the changing values of a culture. - Ravi Zacharias

England and America are two countries separated by a common language. - George Bernard Shaw

Too long they've been gettin' the short end of the totem pole. - Archie Bunker

If you're a good numbers person, you're a bad language person. - Frank Luntz

Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see. - Mark Twain

The sign said "eight items or less." So I changed my name to Les. - Steven Wright

Symptoms are the body's mother tongue; signs are in a foreign language. - John Brown

It is often a sign of wit not to show it, and not to see that others want it. - Suzanne Necker

Dance isn't something that can be explained in words; it has to be danced. - Paige Arden

Optimism and self-pity are the positive and negative poles of modern cowardice. - Cyril Connolly

We dance in a circle and suppose, while the secret sits in the middle and knows. - Robert Frost

The most beautiful words in the English language are "cheque enclosed". - Dorothy Parker

Dance till the stars come down from the rafters! Dance, Dance, Dance till you drop! - W H Auden

When a man falls into his anecdotage, it is a sign for him to retire from the world. - Benjamin Disraeli

We really have everything in common with America nowadays except, of course, language. - Oscar Wilde

Great literature is simply language charged with meaning to the utmost possible degree. - Ezra Pound

Never make fun of someone who speaks broken English. It means they know another language. - H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

My tent doesn't look like much but it is air-conditioned and has exceptional location. - Fennel Hudson

The first man to use abusive language instead of his fists was the founder of civilization. - Sigmund Freud

I think those neighborhood signs that say 'slow children playing' are so very mean. - Zach Galifianakis

Master Kenobi, you disappoint me. Yoda holds you in such high esteem. Surely you can do better! - Count Dooku

The sign of intelligent people is their ability to control emotions by the application of reason. - Marya Mannes

If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss bank. - Woody Allen

Sometimes I have kept my feelings to myself, because I could find no language to describe them in. - Jane Austen

Human language appears to be a unique phenomenon, without significant analogue in the animal world. - Noam Chomsky

I saw a sign: "Rest Area 25 Miles". That's pretty big. Some people must be really tired. - Steven Wright

If you're not failing every now and again, it's a sign you're not doing anything very innovative. - Woody Allen

It's a sign of age if you feel like the morning after the night before and you haven't been anywhere. - Unknown

The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us. - Bill Watterson

Pain is a sign that we are alive. Problems are a sign that we are strong. Prayer is a sign that we are not alone. - Unknown

Life is one big road with lots of signs. So when you're riding through the ruts, don't complicate your mind. - Bob Marley

I could dance with you till the cows come home...
on second thought, I'll dance with the cows till you come home. - Groucho Marx

The protean nature of the computer is such that it can act like a machine or like a language to be shaped and exploited. - Alan Kay

I was not naturally talented. I didn't sing, dance or act, though working around that minor detail made me inventive. - Steve Martin

He who would learn to fly on day must first learn to stand and walk and run and climb and dance; one cannot fly into flying. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

The nine most terrifying words in the English language are,
"I'm from the government and I'm here to help." - Ronald Reagan

The greatest sign of success for a teacher is to be able to say, "The children are now working as if I did not exist." - Maria Montessori

Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at different speeds. A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing. - William James

Always try to use the language so as to make quite clear what you mean and make sure your sentence couldn't mean anything else. - C S Lewis

"I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence? - George Carlin

Heard about the young deaf boy who used sign language?
One day he told his mother a dirty joke and she washed his hands out with soap. - Red Skelton

Music is a language that doesn't speak in particular words. It speaks in emotions, and if it's in the bones, it's in the bones. - Keith Richards

Just be good and kind to your children. Not only are they the future of the world, they're the ones who can sign you into the nursing home. - Dennis Miller

Mathematicians are like Frenchmen: whatever you say to them they translate into their own language and forthwith it is something entirely different. - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe


Sons Of Arthritis

Husband Colors

Soccer Watch

Finger Lickin' Good!

Scottish Variant

Knight Room

FIFA HQ

Spot The Surfer

Finally Got The Sink Fixed

Antique iPhones

Spongebob Suarez

Auto Correct Passing

Computer Resuscitation

PonyTale

Husband of the Year

Child Disarma-meant

Ancient Greek Stormtrooper

Ferrous Wheel

Dese Are My Bebies

Mega Samurai Sudoku Puzzles

Big Boots To Fill

Redneck Dog Kennel

Mom Posting

Flying is so Overrated