#1 humor site on the 'net

Noah Called

Feeling rained out lately?

Noah Called thanks to Wayne Nowazek

QuotaBills
My soul is in the sky. - William Shakespeare

Into the sky to win or die. - Christopher Paolini

Women hold up half the sky. - Mao Zedong

The sky already fell. Now what? - Steven Wright

The story of Noah and the whale. - Archie Bunker

Manners are love in a cool climate. - Quentin Crisp

I talk to God but the sky is empty. - Sylvia Plath

If the sky falls, hold up your hands. - Spanish proverb

Knock on the sky and listen to the sound. - Zen Saying

It wasn't raining when Noah built the ark. - Howard Ruff

I started out as a gaseous cloud. Then I cooled. - Jack Nicholson

A cloudy day is no match for a sunny disposition. - William Ward

Weekend forecast: crafting with a chance of chocolate. - Unknown

He who has the property in the soil has the same up in the sky. - Latin Proverb

Archive: Where the two bees stayed after Noah brought them aboard - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Conversation about the weather is the last refuge of the unimaginative. - Oscar Wilde

Work and pray, live on hay, you'll get pie in the sky when you die. - Joe Hill

Thank God men cannot as yet fly and lay waste the sky as well as the earth. - Henry David Thoreau

News events are like Texas weather. If you don't like it, wait a minute. - Jessica Savitch

Marriage is very difficult. It's like a 5,000-piece jigsaw puzzle, all sky. - Cathy Ladman

Advice from your friends is like the weather, some of it is good, some of it is bad. - Unknown

I don't make plans, because life is short and unpredictable - much like the weather. - Al Roker

I'm leaving because the weather is too good. I hate London when it's not raining. - Groucho Marx

I have to dream and reach for the stars, and if I miss a star then I grab a handful of clouds. - Mike Tyson

The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing. - Steven Wright

I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly. I'll do what it takes till I touch the sky. - Unknown

The visions are fragmented and a dark cloud spreads like spilt ink across the pages of possible futures. - Garth Nix

Be careful not to complain about anything, even the weather, since I am the Author of your circumstances. - Sarah Young

A bank is a place where they lend you an umbrella in fair weather and ask for it back when it begins to rain. - Robert Frost

There are a zillion variables to a hamburger. What part of the animal went into it. What coarseness. What temperature. - Danny Meyer

That black cloud is coming from the direction the wind is blowing, now the wind is coming from where the black cloud is. - Ray Illingworth

The practical importance of the preservation of our forests is augmented by their relations to climate, soil and streams. - John Muir

They invented the three-day bank holiday weekend because you can't lump all the bad weather into just Saturday and Sunday. - Unknown

A cloudy day or a little sunshine have as great an influence on many constitutions as the most recent blessings or misfortunes. - Joseph Addison

I glanced out the window at the signs of spring. The sky was almost blue, the trees were almost budding, the sun was almost bright. - Millard Kaufman

The trouble with weather forecasting is that it's right too often for us to ignore it, and wrong too often for us to rely on it. - Patrick Young

The long, dull, monotonous years of middle-aged prosperity or middle-aged adversity are excellent campaigning weather for the devil. - C S Lewis

Men may change their climate, but they cannot change their nature. A man that goes out a fool cannot ride or sail himself into common sense. - Joseph Addison

NBC News just called it "The Great Freeze" - coldest weather in years. Is our country still spending money on the global warming hoax? - Donald Trump

Even after all this time, the sun never says to the earth, "You owe me." Look what happens with a love like that. It lights the whole sky. - Hafez


Great Quotes (B)

Wayne's Fish

If You're Happy And You Know It

Deer Hunter Tattoo

Nope, Didn't See A Thing

Man Sues Wife Over Make-Up

Down Under Bronco Riding For Kids

Re-Ewes Me

It's A Keeper

Plankstanders

Millionaire Women

Laptop Cooler

Scan Scam

Motorcycle Taxi

I've Got Time

Clangeroo

Redneck Cooler

Instead Of Flowers

Mt. Rushmore from the Canadian Side

I Love Summer

Karma Towing

Salmon-chanted Evening

Hands On Tree

Fart Facts