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Fine Mess

Political humor in the United States

Fine Mess thanks to Tim Smith

QuotaBills
Good government is good politics. - Richard J. Daley

Politics makes strange red-fellows. - Will Rogers

Voters want a fraud they can believe in. - Will Durst

Man is not free unless government is limited. - Ronald Reagan

Politics is just show business for ugly people. - Jay Leno

Politics is not a game. It is an earnest business. - Winston Churchill

God writes comedy but sometimes has a slow audience. - Garrison Keillor

I love a dog. He does nothing for political reasons. - Will Rogers

I greet you in the name of peace, democracy, and freedom. - Nelson Mandela

You can't get rich in politics unless you're a crook. - Harry S Truman

It's a terrible shame that politics has become show business. - Sydney Pollack

The most important political office is that of the private citizen. - Louis D. Brandeis

All I need to make a comedy is a park, a policeman, and a pretty girl. - Charlie Chaplin

Politics is the chloroform of the Irish people, or, rather the hashish. - Oliver St. John Gogarty

Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for. - Will Rogers

To lodge all power in one party and keep it there is to insure bad government. - Mark Twain

No man's life, liberty, or property is safe while the legislature is in session. - Mark Twain

I am on your Walk of Fame in Toronto. My sense of humour is Canadian. But I can't vote. - Donald Sutherland

Patriotism is supporting your country all the time and your government when it deserves it. - Mark Twain

A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. - Robert Frost

I confess I enjoy democracy immensely. It is incomparably idiotic, and hence incomparably amusing. - H L Mencken

A little government and a little luck are necessary in life, but only a fool trusts either of them. - P.J. O'Rourke

I must study politics and war that my sons may have the liberty to study mathematics and philosophy. - John Adams

Our life's a stage, a comedy: either learn to play and take it lightly, or bear its troubles patiently. - Palladas

Give me the liberty to know, to utter, and to argue freely according to my conscience, above all liberties. - John Milton

I believe in only one thing: liberty; but I do not believe in liberty enough to want to force it upon anyone. - H L Mencken

Idealism is like a castle in the air if it is not based on a solid foundation of social and political realism. - Claude McKay

The hardest thing about any political campaign is how to win without proving that you are unworthy of winning. - Theodor Adorno

The crime problem in New York is getting really serious. The other day the Statue of Liberty had both hands up. - Jay Leno

Give me a Murphy bed, a Lazy Susan, a grandfather clock and a bulldog, and I will show you the meaning of comedy. - Jonathan Goldstein

Love, like democracy, can survive almost any attack - except neglect, indifference and maybe an arrow in the back. - Unknown

Only government can take perfectly good paper, cover it with perfectly good ink and make the combination worthless. - Milton Friedman

Frankly, I'd like to see the government get out of war altogether and leave the whole field to private industry. - Joseph Heller

In politics it is necessary either to betray one's country or the electorate. I prefer to betray the electorate. - Charles de Gaulle

Canada's political parties spend a few years in opposition and then govern as if it's permanent payback time. - Bob Rae

What is politics but persuading the public to vote for this and support that and endure these for the promise of those? - Gilbert Highet

It is not in the nature of politics that the best men should be elected. The best men do not want to govern their fellowmen. - George MacDonald

The nine most terrifying words in the English language are,
"I'm from the government and I'm here to help." - Ronald Reagan

The workers' and peasants' government proposes to all warring peoples... negotiations leading to a just, democratic peace. - Lenin

In general, the art of government consists of taking as much money as possible from one party of the citizens to give to the other. - Voltaire


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