#1 humor site on the 'net

Chess Set Ring

Preparing for a relationship checkmate

Chess Set Ring thanks to Louise Alcott

QuotaBills
Candlestine romance - Archie Bunker

Solomon: Jamaican bachelor - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Fame is the thirst of youth. - Lord Byron

Death ends a life, not a relationship. - Jack Lemmon

Life is a relationship between molecules. - Linus Pauling

I could not get the ring without the finger. - Thomas Middleton

English Wrestling Champion: A lord of the ring - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Every time a bell rings, an angel gets his wings. - It's a Wonderful Life

Some guys play hockey. Gretzky plays 40-mph chess. - Lowell Cohn

I failed to make the chess team because of my height. - Woody Allen

Onion Rings: Worn by vegetables when they get married - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The ring always believes that the finger lives for it. - Malcolm de Chazal

Never trust a husband too far, nor a bachelor too near. - Helen Rowland

I think "Hail to the Chief" has a nice ring to it. - John F Kennedy

Fame: The advantage of being known to those who do not know us. - Sebastien Chamfort

I must decline your invitation owing to a subsequent engagement. - Oscar Wilde

I don't really get romance. Bring me fish or moose, not flowers. - Eden Robinson

The most important thing in communication is hearing what isn't said. - Peter F Drucker

Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship. - Sharon Stone

Fame is only good for one thing - they will cash your check in a small town. - Truman Capote

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing. - Emo Philips

Key Ring: A handy little gadget that allows you to lose all your keys at once - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Never knock on death's door. Ring the bell and run away. Death hates that. - Matt Frewer

John Wooden was a hall of fame character long before he was a hall of fame coach. - John C Maxwell

Marketers need to build digital relationships and reputation before closing a sale. - Chris Brogan

The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place. - George Bernard Shaw

We learn the most from imperfect relationships - things like forgiveness and compassion. - Andrea Thompson

Why do dogs always race to the door when the doorbell rings? It's hardly ever for them. - Harry Hill

Of all sound of all bells... most solemn and touching is the peal which rings out the Old Year. - Charles Lamb

Somehow a bachelor never quite gets over the idea that he is a thing of beauty and a boy forever. - Helen Rowland

Romance is thinking about your significant other, when you are supposed to be thinking about something else. - Nicholas Sparks

Pigeons are gentle and smart and have complex social relationships. Their hearing and vision are both excellent. - Ingrid Newkirk

Valentine's Day: Rubbing singles' noses in their lack of a mate and the noses of couples in their lack of time. - Emma McLaughlin

My idea is to make moves to bring chess back to the world's map, to make it part of the world's geography again. - Anatoly Karpov

Middle age is when you're sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone rings and you hope it isn't for you. - Ogden Nash

A kind of banalization of celebrity has occurred: we are now offered an instant, ready-to-mix fame as nutritious as packet soup. - J G Ballard

A problem occurs when people want the benefits of a relationship with God without the responsibilities of a relationship with God. - Jim Herring

I used to live an isolated existence, even in relationships, but now my family knows me for who I really am. Mostly, that's a good thing. - Tim Allen

I formed a new group called Alcoholics-Unanimous. If you don't feel like a drink, you ring another member and he comes over to persuade you. - Richard Harris

Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There's no doubt about it. Anytime you have a romance, your wife is bound to interfere. - Groucho Marx


Sinus Remedy - How To Clear Out Your Nostrils

Auto Strap

Never Run a Red Light

Bee Safe

Hummers Only Look Tough

Tactical Texas

Defence Budget Cuts

Welfare State

No Flies On Me

Stick Family Meal

Wet Floor

Lord Of The Watch

Close Encounters of the Whale Kind

Military Watch Tower

No Go Intersection

Public Transportation In Scotland

Guarded Nights

Financial Meltdown

Fox Kabob

Microwaved Bulb... Watts You Won't See

Saks-e Parking Job

Griller Bees

Texting While Cycling

Redneck Manicure