#1 humor site on the 'net

Breakfast, Lunch, and Dinner Burrito

Mexican meal for big appetites

Breakfast, Lunch, and Dinner Burrito thanks to Keith Blake

QuotaBills
Tacos are the food of genius. - Heather Brewer

Fine words do not produce food. - Nigeria Proverb

Everything goes better with tacos. - Rachel Caine

The French: Germans with good food. - Fran Lebowitz

A party without cake is just a meeting. - Julia Child

The most dangerous food is wedding cake. - James Thurber

Afternoon Snack: The pause that refleshes. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

There ain't no such thing as wrong food. - Sean Stewart

What poison is to food, self-pity is to life. - Oliver C. Wilson

She did not so much cook as assassinate food. - Storm Jameson

Queuing tips for fans: wrap up and bring food! - Niall Horan

Life is too short not to order the bacon dessert. - George Takei

Chocolate is more than a food, but less than a drug. - R J Huxtable

Food tastes best when you eat it with your own spoon. - Denmark Proverb

Jello: The only food your husband has ever learned to cook - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Food is not rational. Food is culture, habit, craving and identity. - Jonathan S Foer

Cooking Tip: Wrap turkey leftovers in aluminum foil and throw them out. - Nicole Hollander

A great empire, like a great cake, is most easily diminished at the edges. - Benjamin Franklin

The best comfort food will always be greens, cornbread, and fried chicken. - Maya Angelou

The maxim that the "best is the cheapest" does not apply to food. - W.O. Atwater

I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick - not wounded - dead. - Woody Allen

What else is there to live for? Chinese food and women. There is nothing else! - Dudley Moore

When I get a little money, I buy books. If any is left, I buy food and clothes. - Erasmus

This is a Jewish cake - they give this to a Jewish kid before he gets circumscribed. - Archie Bunker

Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water. - WC Fields

When men reach their sixties and retire, they go to pieces. Women go right on cooking. - Gail Sheehy

If not for me being stoned and clinging to a taco, it would have been terribly romantic. - Richelle Mead

A recipe is only a theme, which an intelligent cook can play each time with a variation. - Madame Benoit

I need to tone up, as I eat a lot of fast food. I love Maccy D's, Subway and Domino's. - Amy Childs

I like spaghetti bolognese, I like baked beans on toast. I hate French food. I hate fancy food. - Simon Cowell

The shoe that fits one person pinches another; there is no recipe for living that suits all cases. - Carl Jung

Malenutrition: The practice of depriving a man from food for more than a couple of hours - or during a football game - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

If you maintain a healthy diet, or at least are smart about your food choices, you'll still see the pounds come off. - Misty May-Treanor

When you're stressed, eat ice cream, cake, chocolate and sweets. Why? Because stressed spelled backwards is desserts. - Unknown

I like simple food, seasoned with just salt, pepper, oil and vinegar. Complicated food and complicated lives are never good. - Sirio Maccioni

How come if you mix flour and water together you get glue? And when you add eggs and sugar you get cake? Where does the glue go? - Rita Rudner

It's a piece of cake until you get to the top. You find you can't stop playing the game the way you've always played it. - Richard M Nixon

One of my biggest fears is that I'm going to die alone in my home, and my cats will eat me because I am too dead to open their food cans. - Kelli Jae Baeli

I like a quiet evening with family or friends over, great food and great discussion, and a lot of laughter. That's really what fills my tank. - Anna Eshoo

I'll paddle board, swim in the ocean, roll in the sand, soak up the sun, eat good food, be with friends and family and go fishing with my dad. - Behati Prinsloo


Mexorcist

Vegetarian MissSteak

VW Owner

Zoo Invitation

Robbie Knievel Tickets

Carb Cutter

Women's Rights

False Teeth

2021 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Rabbit or Duck?

Radar Replacement

I Shoot People!

Evolution and Philosophy

Owl Get Around To It

Redneck Piton

The World Is Going Down The Drain

First Dodge Ram

Moldy Bible

Aussie Definition of 'Lucky'

Church on Wheels

Hungry Tree

How We Played Online Before The Internet

Soda Bottle Boat

Princess Parking