Bathroom Smoker

Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar. - Sigmund Freud

Hollywood is like Picasso's bathroom. - Candice Bergen

Always go to the bathroom when you have a chance. - King George V

Smoking means always having to say you're sorry. - Tom Ferguson

Love is an exploding cigar that you willingly smoke. - Lynda Barry

A woman is only a woman, but a good cigar is a smoke. - Rudyard Kipling

I would rather sleep in a bathroom than in another hotel. - Billy Wilder

The kitchen. The bathroom. The yin and yang of the household. - David C. Holley

There's a lot involved in going to the bathroom for women. - Leah Remini

My grandmother took a bath every year, whether she was dirty or not. - Brendan Behan

Most of the time he sounds like he has a mouth full of toilet paper. - Rex Reed

Running is an unnatural act, except from enemies and to the bathroom. - Unknown

I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and radio. - Rodney Dangerfield

I phoned my Dad to tell him I had stopped smoking. He called me a quitter. - Steven Pearl

I threw the kitchen sink at him, but he went to the bathroom and got his tub. - Andy Roddick

When I was younger I used to lock myself in the bathroom and read in the dry tub. - Karen Russell

There are two things that Jack Bauer never does. Show mercy, and go to the bathroom. - Kiefer Sutherland

I'd rather be able to face myself in the bathroom mirror than be rich and famous. - Ani DiFranco

France is a country where the money falls apart but you can't tear the toilet paper. - Billy Wilder

The cure for a broken heart is simple, my lady. A hot bath and a good night's sleep. - Margaret George

Smoking kills. And if you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life. - Brooke Shields

Jitterbug: 1. A Scotchman in front of a pay toilet; 2. Insect that's had too much coffee. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

There must be quite a few things a hot bath won't cure, but I don't know many of them. - Sylvia Plath

Basically my wife was immature. I'd be in my bath, and she'd come in and sink my boats. - Woody Allen

Castro couldn't even go to the bathroom unless the Soviet Union put the nickel in the toilet. - Richard M Nixon

I do like to read in bed, but because I have two kids I'm often forced to read in the bathroom. - Eoin Colfer

If you don't want your dog to have bad breath, do what I do: pour a little Lavoris in the toilet. - Jay Leno

Cigarette sales would drop to zero overnight if the warning said, "Cigarettes contain fat." - Dave Barry

For marriage to be a success, every woman and every man should have her and his own bathroom. The end. - Catherine Zeta-Jones

I could juggle anything in my day: balls, cigar boxes, knives. But I could never juggle my income tax. - WC Fields

Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times. - Mark Twain

It was really strange to see all these apes standing around eating popcorn, smoking, wearing sunglasses. - Estella Warren

I sleep with a light on in the bathroom so I can see where I'm at, because I wake up and have no clue. - Carrie Underwood

If you resolve to give up smoking, drinking and loving, you don't actually live longer; it just seems longer. - Clement Freud

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck

It's like running a marathon race. We train all hours of the day. When you are taking a bath, you are thinking of the flight. - Kalpana Chawla

I wish I had a nickel for every song that I've left in the bathroom, written down on a matchbox, or just totally forgotten about. - Tommy Shaw

Take a music bath once or twice a week for a few seasons, and you will find that it is to the soul what the water bath is to the body. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman - or a bad woman - it depends on how much happiness you can handle. - George Burns

I've got this thing for spicy stuff. Now, if you give me hot chocolate with chili pepper, a book and a bubble bath, I'm a happy girl. - Shiloh Walker