Bathroom Smoker

Hollywood is like Picasso's bathroom. - Candice Bergen

Smoking cures weight problems... eventually. - Steven Wright

Smoking is one of the leading causes of statistics. - Fletcher Knebel

Smoking means always having to say you're sorry. - Tom Ferguson

Love is an exploding cigar that you willingly smoke. - Lynda Barry

Igloo: 1. An icicle built for two; 2. An Alaskan toilet. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I never feel so much myself as when I'm in a hot bath. - Sylvia Plath

Endangered forests are being slaughtered for toilet paper. - Daphne Zuniga

The kitchen. The bathroom. The yin and yang of the household. - David C. Holley

I have made it a rule never to smoke more than one cigar at a time. - Mark Twain

Every bathroom in my house will ultimately have a Toto bidet in it. - Ken Marino

Running is an unnatural act, except from enemies and to the bathroom. - Unknown

I started singing in the bathroom. Nothing was coming out. It was ghastly. - Rod Stewart

High school is a lot like toilet paper: you only miss it when it's gone. - Unknown

I'm at the age now where just putting my cigar in its holder is a thrill. - George Burns

When I was younger I used to lock myself in the bathroom and read in the dry tub. - Karen Russell

I'd rather be able to face myself in the bathroom mirror than be rich and famous. - Ani DiFranco

At Disneyland, you never go 'backstage' - even when you're in the bathroom. - Hideo Kojima

France is a country where the money falls apart but you can't tear the toilet paper. - Billy Wilder

Hiring someone to write your autobiography is like hiring someone to take a bath for you. - Mae West

I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance - waiting for the bathroom. - Bob Hope

Music Lover: A man, who upon hearing a soprano in the bathroom, puts his ear to the keyhole - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Smoking kills. And if you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life. - Brooke Shields

Jitterbug: 1. A Scotchman in front of a pay toilet; 2. Insect that's had too much coffee. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

There must be quite a few things a hot bath won't cure, but I don't know many of them. - Sylvia Plath

Castro couldn't even go to the bathroom unless the Soviet Union put the nickel in the toilet. - Richard M Nixon

With every bathroom renovation, there are three areas that I focus on: budget, function and style. - Candice Olson

Field hockey is my strongest sport, and if I lose a game, I take a long, hot bath and moan about it. - Emma Watson

Cigarette sales would drop to zero overnight if the warning said, "Cigarettes contain fat." - Dave Barry

I could juggle anything in my day: balls, cigar boxes, knives. But I could never juggle my income tax. - WC Fields

Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times. - Mark Twain

It was really strange to see all these apes standing around eating popcorn, smoking, wearing sunglasses. - Estella Warren

I sleep with a light on in the bathroom so I can see where I'm at, because I wake up and have no clue. - Carrie Underwood

If you resolve to give up smoking, drinking and loving, you don't actually live longer; it just seems longer. - Clement Freud

The best measure of a man's honesty isn't his income tax return. It's the zero adjust on his bathroom scale. - Arthur C. Clarke

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck

I wish I had a nickel for every song that I've left in the bathroom, written down on a matchbox, or just totally forgotten about. - Tommy Shaw

I worked in a health food store once. A guy came in and asked me, "If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?" - Steven Wright

I've got this thing for spicy stuff. Now, if you give me hot chocolate with chili pepper, a book and a bubble bath, I'm a happy girl. - Shiloh Walker

My wife was a make-up artist, and she's a total product junkie. Our bathroom is packed full of lotions and potions so I end up trying them out. - Robert Carlyle