#1 humor site on the 'net

No Wash Feet

Far East restroom restrictions

No Wash Feet thanks to Wayne Nowazek

QuotaBills
When you pray, move your feet. - African Proverb

A closed mouth gathers no feet. - Unknown

Always go to the bathroom when you have a chance. - King George V

I write poems like some people sing in the bathroom. - Amit Bhatia

I would rather sleep in a bathroom than in another hotel. - Billy Wilder

It is better to die on your feet than to live on your knees. - Emiliano Zapata

The kitchen. The bathroom. The yin and yang of the household. - David C. Holley

There's a lot involved in going to the bathroom for women. - Leah Remini

He who has imagination without learning, has wings and no feet. - Joseph Joubert

My mom always said normal is just a cycle on the washing machine. - Wynonna Judd

My grandmother took a bath every year, whether she was dirty or not. - Brendan Behan

Running is an unnatural act, except from enemies and to the bathroom. - Unknown

Forget aging. If you're six feet above ground, it's a good day. - Faith Hill

I always thought a yard was three feet, then I started mowing the lawn. - C.E. Cowman

Watermelon - it's a good fruit. You eat, you drink, you wash your face. - Enrico Caruso

I feel like a midget with muddy feet had been walking over my tongue all night. - WC Fields

I've had a lot of luck. If I didn't I'd be washing bottles in Russia. - Marat Safin

When I was younger I used to lock myself in the bathroom and read in the dry tub. - Karen Russell

The foolish man seeks happiness in the distance. The wise grows it under his feet. - James Oppenheim

If you play a tune and a person don't tap their feet, don't play the tune. - Count Basie

There are two things that Jack Bauer never does. Show mercy, and go to the bathroom. - Kiefer Sutherland

At Disneyland, you never go 'backstage' - even when you're in the bathroom. - Hideo Kojima

A man's feet should be planted in his country, but his eyes should survey the world. - George Santayana

In the hopes of reaching the moon men fail to see the flowers that blossom at their feet. - Albert Schweitzer

Hiring someone to write your autobiography is like hiring someone to take a bath for you. - Mae West

I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance - waiting for the bathroom. - Bob Hope

There must be quite a few things a hot bath won't cure, but I don't know many of them. - Sylvia Plath

At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom. - George Carlin

I do like to read in bed, but because I have two kids I'm often forced to read in the bathroom. - Eoin Colfer

Forget not that the earth delights to feel your bare feet and the winds long to play with your hair. - Khalil Gibran

Field hockey is my strongest sport, and if I lose a game, I take a long, hot bath and moan about it. - Emma Watson

Show me a man with both feet firmly on the ground, and I'll show you a man who can't get his pants off. - Unknown

The best measure of a man's honesty isn't his income tax return. It's the zero adjust on his bathroom scale. - Arthur C. Clarke

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck

Take a music bath once or twice a week for a few seasons, and you will find that it is to the soul what the water bath is to the body. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

Life is a child playing around your feet, a tool you hold firmly in your grip, a bench you sit down upon in the evening, in your garden. - Jean Anouilh

I've got this thing for spicy stuff. Now, if you give me hot chocolate with chili pepper, a book and a bubble bath, I'm a happy girl. - Shiloh Walker

My wife was a make-up artist, and she's a total product junkie. Our bathroom is packed full of lotions and potions so I end up trying them out. - Robert Carlyle

Dogs display reluctance and wrath
If you try to give them a bath;
They bury bones in hideaways
And half the time they trot sideaways. - Ogden Nash

This is love: to fly toward a secret sky, to cause a hundred veils to fall each moment. First to let go of life. Finally, to take a step without feet. - Rumi


Proper English

Winter SOS

Canadian Driving Perk

Radio Shack Closes Down

Lunch Apple

Country Office

Pre Tsunami

Olive Weather Forecast

2020 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars (3)

Flood Float

Mud Pie

Double Your Vision

Piano Ring

Extra Safe Lock

Believe In Yourself

Kid Search

UFO Cloud

Indecisive Shopper

Bar Code Casualty

Only In Texas

Eastern Screech Owl

International Sign of Marriage

Soccer Watch

Science Project Turmoil