#1 humor site on the 'net

How To Tweet Others

... as you would like to be Tweeted

How To Tweet Others thanks to Ken Ward

QuotaBills
My friends are my estate. - Emily Dickinson

The media made it unsexy to be hairy. - Russell Peters

Friends are God's apology for relatives. - Hugh Kingsmill

Friends don't let friends use Comic Sans. - Unknown

Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer. - Michael Corleone

Treasure your relationships, not your possessions. - Anthony J. D'Angelo

Flatterers looks like friends, as wolves like dogs. - George Chapman

The ornament of a house is the friends who frequent it. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

America has no permanent friends or enemies, only interests. - Henry Kissinger

Only your real friends will tell you when your face is dirty. - Sicilian Proverb

God gave us our relatives; thank God we can choose our friends. - Ethel Mumford

Champagne for my real friends and real pain for my sham friends. - Tom Waits

He hasn't an enemy in the world, but all his friends hate him. - Unknown

In prosperity our friends know us; in adversity we know our friends. - J. Churton Collins

A quarrel between friends, when made up, adds a new tie to friendship. - Saint Francis de Sales

A wise man gets more use from his enemies than a fool from his friends. - Baltasar Gracian

The first resistance to social change is to say it's not necessary. - Gloria Steinem

Good friends are hard to find, harder to leave, and impossible to forget. - Unknown

Money can't buy you friends, but you can get a better class of enemy. - Spike Milligan

Prosperity is no just scale; adversity is the only balance to weigh friends. - Plutarch

People who have good relationships at home are more effective in the marketplace. - Zig Ziglar

I can trust my friends. These people force me to examine myself, encourage me to grow. - Cher

If you want to make peace, you don't talk to your friends. You talk to your enemies. - Moshe Dayan

When the media ask George Bush a question, he answers, "Can I use a lifeline?" - Robin Williams

We learn the most from imperfect relationships - things like forgiveness and compassion. - Andrea Thompson

Never make excuses. Your friends don't need them and your foes won't believe them. - John Wooden

Institutions that once had to go through media to deliver information are now themselves media. - Andrew Nachison

Health is the greatest gift, contentment the greatest wealth, faithfulness the best relationship. - Buddha

There's a thing that keeps surprising you about stormy old friends after they die: their silence. - Ben Hecht

It takes a great deal of bravery to stand up to our enemies, but just as much to stand up to our friends. - J K Rowling

There is not Communism or Marxism, but representative democracy and social justice in a well-planned economy. - Fidel Castro

As yet, Bernard Shaw hasn't become prominent enough to have any enemies, but none of his friends like him. - Oscar Wilde

Friendship with one's self is all important, because without it one cannot be friends with anyone else in the world. - Eleanor Roosevelt

Call it a clan, call it a network, call it a tribe, call it a family. Whatever you call it, whoever you are, you need one. - Jane Howard

If another one of my Whole Food friends says my wife should have a home birth, I am going to punch all the soy on the planet. - Patton Oswalt

The longer we live the more we think and the higher the value we put on friendship and tenderness towards parents and friends. - Samuel Johnson

A lot of times, I run a thought experiment: 'If I were not at Facebook, what would I be doing to make the world more open?' - Mark Zuckerberg

Facebook was not originally created to be a company. It was built to accomplish a social mission - to make the world more open and connected. - Mark Zuckerberg

You don't develop courage by being happy in your relationships everyday. You develop it by surviving difficult times and challenging adversity. - Epicurus

We spend precious hours fearing the inevitable. It would be wise to use that time adoring our families, cherishing our friends and living our lives. - Maya Angelou


One At A Time

Shofar So Good

Temple Car

Closing Time

Wine Glass Lanyard

Awning Truck Advertising

Plugged In

Org Chart - Simplified Version

Extreme Value

Instant Acrophobia

How To Hire Engineers

Business School Basics

Waterwheel Rotisserie

Elephant Bus

Promote Yourself

Time Machine

Redneck Engagement Ring

Forever Clean Toilet

Edible Clock

Up-Set & Hungry Trucks

Bear Pinata

Swim Vacation

What Are Your Skills?

Portable Barber Shop