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Home Invasion Kit

Liberal way to defend your home

A liberal friend asked me what I thought he might need in order to defend his home and family from home invasion. I suggested a couple of clips, a 9mm, and a box of shells. A few days later he sent me this picture and asked me how to make it all work.
Home Invasion Kit thanks to Jim Serritella

QuotaBills
I only direct in self-defense. - Mel Brooks

People use irony as a defense mechanism. - David Byrne

Humor is just another defense against the universe. - Mel Brooks

Every survival kit should include a sense of humor. - Unknown

Man has no nobler function than to defend the truth. - Mahalia Jackson

Protect your enthusiasm from the negativity of others. - H. Jackson Brown Jr.

There is no defense against criticism except obscurity. - Joseph Addison

We cannot defend freedom abroad by deserting it at home. - Edward R. Murrow

Denial is a useful defense mechanism until it's not. - Rosalind Kaplan

A sense of humor is a major defense against minor troubles. - Mignon McLaughlin

A woman's best protection is a little money of her own. - Clare B Luce

There is no security in this life. There is only opportunity. - Douglas MacAurthur

I would uphold the law if for no other reason but to protect myself. - Thomas More

We spend our time searching for security and hate it when we get it. - John Steinbeck

An invasion of armies can be resisted, but not an idea whose time has come. - Victor Hugo

He prefers the security of known misery to the misery of unfamiliar insecurity. - Sheldon B. Kopp

Idealism, alas, does not protect one from ignorance, dogmatism, and foolishness. - Sidney Hook

There's no better book with which to defend the Bible than the Bible itself. - Dwight L. Moody

A memorandum isn't written to inform the receiver, but to protect the writer. - Dean Acheson

I wear a fun sock when I travel to give the security staff a well-deserved chuckle. - Chelsea Peretti

Age does not protect you from love. But love, to some extent, protects you from age. - Jeanne Moreau

Of all the tasks of government, the most basic is to protect its citizens from violence. - John Foster Dulles

A man's own good breeding is the best security against other people's ill manners. - Lord Chesterfield

It is easier for a woman to defend her virtue against men than her reputation against women. - French Proverb

I cannot think of any need in childhood as strong as the need for a father's protection. - Sigmund Freud

There is no defense against adverse fortune which is so effectual as an habitual sense of humor. - Thomas W. Higginson

I do not think there is any silver bullet to solving the technology side of the security equation. - John W. Thompson

Humour is our way of defending ourselves from life's absurdities by thinking absurdly about them. - Lewis Mumford

Relying on the government to protect your privacy is like asking a peeping tom to install your window blinds. - John P Barlow

The only security men can have for their political liberty, consists in keeping their money in their own pockets. - Lysander Spooner

Tariff: A scale of taxes on imports, designed to protect the domestic producer against the greed of his consumer. - Ambrose Bierce

It might be pardonable to refuse to defend some men, but to defend them negligently is nothing short of criminal. - Marcus Tullius Cicero

Physicians and politicians resemble one another in this respect, that some defend the constitution and others destroy it. - Unknown

As an experienced artist, I carry my work like a secret pregnancy. I am always aware of inner life and the need to protect it. - Julia Cameron

Accountant: 1. A noble insect; 2. A dutiful book balancer whose role within a corporation is to protect it from creative ideas. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Sir, your remarks are repugnant to me, and I disagree with your viewpoints. But I will defend to the death your right to express them. - Voltaire

Politics is the gentle art of getting votes from the poor and campaign funds from the rich, by promising to protect each from the other. - Oscar Ameringer

Love as powerful as your mother's for you leaves its own mark ... to have been loved so deeply ... will give us some protection forever. - J K Rowling

In a world of complex threats, our security and leadership depends on all elements of our power - including strong and principled diplomacy. - Barack Obama

Social Security's not the hard one to solve. Medicare, that is the gorilla in the room, and you've got to put all of it on the table. - Joe Biden


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