Grandma's Cell Phone

If the phone doesn't ring it's me. - Jimmy Buffett

The days of the digital watch are numbered. - Tom Stoppard

Stop all the clocks, cut off the telephone. - W H Auden

He's breaking his grandpa's sacrolificat. - Archie Bunker

Humor is the affectionate communication of insight. - Leo Rosten

I thought talk was cheap until I saw our telephone bill. - Henny Youngman

Well, if I called the wrong number, why did you answer the phone? - James Thurber

Extremists think 'communication' means agreeing with them. - Leo Rosten

If it’s the Psychic Network, why do they need a phone number? - Robin Williams

Now Bart, since you broke Grandpa's teeth, he gets to break yours. - Homer Simpson

The most important thing in communication is hearing what isn't said. - Peter F Drucker

Most of life's great moments happen when your phone is in your pocket. - Unknown

Sometimes the best communication happens when you're on separate bikes. - Unknown

If we are a country committed to free speech, then why do we have phone bills? - Steven Wright

My favourite place to eat is my grandma's kitchen. She makes a mean crab cake. - Karlie Kloss

Marketers need to build digital relationships and reputation before closing a sale. - Chris Brogan

The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place. - George Bernard Shaw

My wife likes to talk on the phone during sex. She called me from Chicago last night. - Rodney Dangerfield

That's the great thing about a tractor. You can't really hear the phone ring. - Jeff Foxworthy

Good communication is as stimulating as black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after. - Anne Morrow Lindbergh

I like the map feature on the iPhone that tells me where I am, because I travel a lot. - Gary Shteyngart

A gorilla with a cellphone riding a bicycle is bound to generate some clever captions. - Steve Breen

No matter how big and bad you are, when a 2-year-old hand you a toy phone, you answer it. - Unknown

For three days after death hair and fingernails continue to grow but phone calls taper off. - Johnny Carson

E-mails are letters, after all, more lasting than phone calls, even if many of them r 2 cursory 4 u. - Anna Quindlen

Carry your courage in an easily accessible place, the way you do your cellphone or your wallet. Courage is the ultimate career move. - Anna Quindlen

She's so fat she's my two best friends. She wears stretch caftans. She's got more chins than the Chinese telephone directory. - Joan Rivers

Blind dates are treacherous. You don't know who this person is. You wonder, "Should I call my grandma during coffee to get out of this?" - Alan Alda

This 'telephone' has too many shortcomings to be seriously considered as a means of communication. The device is inherently of no value to us. - Unknown